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OH EM EFF GEE.

Does anyone else remember that PSA from the late 70s, early 80s where a dowdy little girl gets taken to a bunch of stores by her dad and she gets a complete new look from head to toe? Hair to shoes and everything in between? And it's about her dad spending time with her? Okay, PoS message, I know, but - I was having that day today.

Mr. S gave me carte blanche to have a "feel pretty" day today. I'll put it like this: the first pair of jeans I tried on were MAGNIFICENT. Jeans. And the word "magnificent." Like... I should have bought a lottery ticket. Oh, and they were on sale. My ass looks like a brick-shit house in them. GREAT DAY. Good sushi, CDs I wanted on sale... PERFECT.

Last part of the day: haircut and color. I only needed a trim, say a half-inch, because I JUST got a cut three weeks ago.

She took off 6 inches. I wear glasses. I can't fucking SEE when I get a haircut. Yeah, I know: it grows back. I AM A LEO. DO NOT FUCK WITH MY HAIR. I feel naked and fat-faced and MAD and I didn't let her do my color, and because I have it ingrained in me, I TIPPED HER ANYWAY. But, ha ha, only 12%.

*crawls under the blankets and takes hair-gro and has a thoroughly Anne moment*

Sue: it barely brushes my shoulders! I'm a dork, I know, but I'm SAD. I am ASLAN on the STONE TABLE. GOD I AM PATHETIC. *doesn't frickin' CARE*

Comments

( 52 comments — Leave a comment )
julia_here
Jan. 9th, 2006 01:43 pm (UTC)
Six inches? ARGH!

(writes down new reason I love contact lenses)

Julia, random
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:10 pm (UTC)
GAH. Okay. In the grand scheme of things, I feel frickin' ridiculous. People have no FEET in the world.

But in my world I had good hair.

WHY didn't I wear my contacts? Bah.
tinpanalley
Jan. 9th, 2006 01:44 pm (UTC)

I AM A LEO. DO NOT FUCK WITH MY HAIR.

Yes! Leos unite! I'm the same way! What was she thinking?!!

*hugs you to me* Remember that Matthew still thought Anne was the prettiest girl with short hair! :)
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:11 pm (UTC)
*bawls* Matthew!! If only mr. S wasn't out of town he could comfort me!

*has a small smile from Matthew love shared*
_divya_
Jan. 9th, 2006 01:46 pm (UTC)
No! NO NO NO. You're not pathetic. That's something that even a good-ass day can't fix.

::PETS OMG::
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:12 pm (UTC)
BAH. I really need to watch PBS news and get the fuck over myself.

(By Di! My HAIR.)
*nuzzles*
crayonbreakygal
Jan. 9th, 2006 01:47 pm (UTC)
Oh crap. Been there, done that. That's a lot. I hate when that happens. It sucks.

**grow hair, grow hair, grow hair, grow hair**

At least you found great jeans. That can be worth lots.
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:13 pm (UTC)
JEANS. I pulled them out and admired them and stayed AWAY FROM THE MIRROR.

JEANS. Dude - why didn't I buy a lottery ticket? They fit! Like - I didn't have to wriggle or nuthin!
going_not_gone
Jan. 9th, 2006 01:50 pm (UTC)
Remember, no one will be looking at your hair, they'll be too busy admiring your ass in the new jeans. You just have to keep wearing your new jeans till your hair grows back.

I bet you look cute.

*hugs*
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:14 pm (UTC)
*cough* I did buy a new "chip clip" for my hair, so I think it will be getting a lot of use until I get used to the fly-away layers of shortness.

*hides* I'm such a dope.
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gracielu
Jan. 9th, 2006 01:56 pm (UTC)
Ok, not to belittle the HAIR WOE, because as an Aries, I understand the Do Not Fuck With My Hair message, and go you one further to say DO NOT FUCK WITH ANY PART OF ME. EVER. BUT. Since I've seen the pictures, I can tell you that there's no way for you to look fat, m'dear. It's just not possible, so go get a mirror and look at your magnificent ass for awhile ~ your hair should be all grown out by the time you get tired of it. =D
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:15 pm (UTC)
(No, no - fat FACED. Round cheeks of doom.) Okay, so I *did* also find some black lace hipsters at Victoria's Secret... Maybe I can distract the Mister with those and wear a paper sack over the DUMB HAIR.

Heh. He'll probably never notice. *leans against you*
ropo
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:01 pm (UTC)
You shoulda done what I did the last time I told a guy to take off an inch and he took of 3.5 inches. I was at a cheapy Supercuts type of place, and the cut cost maybe $10. I tipped him $1, and he looked at me like "that's all you're giving me?" so I ripped that dollar bill out of his hand and flounced out.

Asking for .5 inches and losing 12 times that much is a prisonable offense, if you ask me. Not only would I have not tipped - I wouldn't have paid for the haircut and would make them give me another one free, from another stylist of course.

Don't ever mess with a Gemini's hair, either. *g*

Meanwhile, I bet your ass and your boobs and your hair all look great anyway, 'cause you're a hottie.
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:19 pm (UTC)
SHE SHOULD GO TO PRISON! TO HAIR JAIL. WHere she has to style inmate's hair with a rat tail comb and her TEETH.

(And normally I like sassy women! She was sassy! And jokey! And from Trinidad! And she said, "Someone yesta-day say I try to BOOTCHER he's har. Eh. It gonna grow back, man.")

That should have been my clue.

Aslan came back more glorious, didn't he? *pines for mane*
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amybnnyc
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:32 pm (UTC)
GACK! ::moment of Leo hair-importance solidarity:: I'm so sorry!

But yay! for jeans, though, and sushi, and CDs!

::offers chocolate and booze::
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 02:40 pm (UTC)
*saves the chocolate for later, goes straight for the booze*

Girls are the best. They know JUST what to do.

*fondly recalls the excellent seaweed and salmon skin sushi from lunch. Mmmmmm. and my cute waitress who beamed at me.*
allegraconbrio
Jan. 9th, 2006 03:03 pm (UTC)
Leos, Aslan - the glorious shorn mane. I am sighing and wishing you a much better hair experience next time with someone DIFFERENT! Poor you...the tipping thing - gawd, I have that too. My last shearing was traumatic, still trying to grow it out 7 weeks later, and woe. Not that I ever really loved my hair, but woe.

This does call for booze. ASAP. The jeans, however? Rock on, Stoney. Cloud, lining, yada yada... nice day of you time, hurrah. Work that bootie, babe. :)
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 03:19 pm (UTC)
I'm going to wear those damn jeans to bed. After drinking a bottle of champagne and buying a new ball-cap.

:D
entrenous88
Jan. 9th, 2006 03:37 pm (UTC)
Oh, sweetie! I just fear hairdressers for that reason -- I used to get all kinds of "but I didn't want that haircuts as a kid. I'm sure you look gorgeous, but of course it's not right that she didn't pay attention to what you asked for.
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:03 pm (UTC)
GAH. I had some HORRIBLE haircuts as a girl - mostly after my parents' divorce and my dad was in charge of things. Ha. Boys.

(and she broke a comb in my hair!)
zyrya
Jan. 9th, 2006 03:51 pm (UTC)
Oh, baby darling sweetie, I feel for you.

::assassinates the hairdresser::
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:04 pm (UTC)
*climbs into your lap, gets you to tie the headscraf in the back for me*
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trepkos
Jan. 9th, 2006 03:54 pm (UTC)
You tipped her?
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:05 pm (UTC)
I KNOW.

I KNOW. I can't help it. Unless I'm set on fire I will ALWAYS leave a tip. (Man, I used to work for tips. It's ingrained.)
cherusha
Jan. 9th, 2006 04:35 pm (UTC)
*cuddles*
I spent five minutes trying to figure out why you wouldn't be able to see anything.

I wear glasses.

I AM a DORK!


Hmmm, I'm also a Libra and love to have my hair fucked with - oh baby, fuck it hard and fuck it goooood. Shave it all off, why don't you, and just let me wear a wig for the rest of my life. It shall be GLORIOUS.
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:06 pm (UTC)
Okay, if I'm going to get my hair wacked off? Sure. I used to have a trimmer on a one blade in the back - but I've been cultivating this mane... And it's the most unflattering length EVER for me.

AND WHY ARE YOU MOCKING ME?!?! *falls to the floor, bereft and ALONE*
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terilyn4
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:02 pm (UTC)
oh wow!!! 6 inches? I can sympathize... a few years ago, my hair was down to my waist and I loved it. went for a trim and the stylist said I had dead ends and she'd need to trim off a few inches to get all of them... she turned me away from the mirror while she was cutting it...when she turned me back around, my hair was barely past my shoulders!!! My mom claims my shriek of outrage could be heard 5 blocks over!!! grrrrrrr, took me over a year to grow it back out and several tons of ice cream to soothe me
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:07 pm (UTC)
Dear god! That's a hell of a shock. I mean, I've done that very thing on purpose and was still wobbly-chinned, but whoa.

Why don't they listen to us?! And why didn't I just wait until my normal girl came back?
lynnenne
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:34 pm (UTC)
Sorry about the hair, sweets. But I got distracted by the jeans comment. You found jeans that actually FIT? And that make your ass look GREAT? Where are these magic jeans, and where can I find some???
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:58 pm (UTC)
OH MY GOD. YES. And it was two pair, but I didn't want to brag.

The awesome pair that required NO WRIGGLING to get in: Tommy Hilfiger (which usually don't fit me right), low-rise, boot-cut, medium wash with an AWESOME embroidered detail on the back pockets in blues. Pockets are KEY to jeans.

The other was a pair of Lucky Brand, which is hands down the best pair of jeans out there. They make ANY ass look good. (but I got a size smaller than usual! Dude! I can wear a ponytail, but JEANS! SMALLER EVEN!!)
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bitchygrrl
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:39 pm (UTC)
6 inches :O !@#$%^&* *shaves stylist bald*
*pets stoney* You are still hawt as ever I'm sure :)
stoney321
Jan. 9th, 2006 05:59 pm (UTC)
BAH! Ponytail city here I come. Good thing I LIKE ballcaps.

:D
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(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Jan. 10th, 2006 06:09 am (UTC)
It is LAYERED to hell. Yes, it'll be great in six months when I've recovered my length, but for now I feel like Leather Tuskadero. (i would let you. I would let you cut my hair.)

BAH.

But the jeans are AWESOME. Macy's + winter sale = JOY.
chantal87
Jan. 9th, 2006 09:36 pm (UTC)
Oh honey I can sympathize with the hair ordeal.

I went to a hairdresser once and asked for a trim. I dont know what she was thinking Maybe she thought I said "I wanna look like him" at the same time she was looking at a random halloween display. She cut my hair. The end result was not pretty. I looked like I had the hair of Frankenstein nope, not the bride of, Freakin' Frank.

It was horrible. I ran home and hid in my bathroom. (I was 18)
Unexpected haircuts suck!
But woohoo! on the jeans find.
stoney321
Jan. 10th, 2006 06:12 am (UTC)
Oh GOD! How awful. Why do they do this to us? Why do we care? Well, because we do, I suppose.

*hides in your bathroom*
paynbow
Jan. 10th, 2006 01:38 am (UTC)
ARG! I ried to comment and LJ ATE it! I FEEL your icon! *g*

I am squishing the hairdresser's head...which is messing up their hair...KARMA!!!

Embrace the jeans, for good jeans are fleeting in this world... *whah*
stoney321
Jan. 10th, 2006 06:13 am (UTC)
*SHALES FIST AT LJ*

I'm feeling the support - to the extent that I feel shame for whining!

If the jeans weren't so damn awesome, I'd make a pillow out of them and hug them until I didn't look like Leather Tuscadero anymore.
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(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Jan. 13th, 2006 05:35 am (UTC)
UGH. Lj again with the lack of notification. BOOO!

I would take you shopping! Dallas is the shopping MECCA. Seriously. Everything is here, and lots of it.

As to the hairdresser? I think she just likes cutting. SHE JUST WOULDN'T STOP. SHe's addicted to the snip, snip. After a few days, though, I'll say that my hair is super healthy - all the dry/damaged bits are gone, but it's MOM hair. I had sexy hair and now I have MOM hair.

I'm such a spazz. Now come see me and let's go shopping!!
sweet_ali
Jan. 10th, 2006 09:57 pm (UTC)
HOLY CRAP! How did they misinterpret "trim" to 6 inches?!

Damn.

However, I'm sure it looks adorable and I'll just tell you that again and again until you get used to it *smooch*
stoney321
Jan. 13th, 2006 05:36 am (UTC)
GAH. LJ JUST sent me this. Was not ignoring!!

Well... on the positive side, my hair is REALLY healthy now. *wry grin* And THANK YOU. *gives you extra scoop of ice cream*
mskakaako
Jan. 12th, 2006 10:42 pm (UTC)
Oh dear.
Six inches and it wasn't even party time? Hahah.

*ahem* Girlfriend, I mourn with you. To be fair though, Aslan probably had more than six inches taken off, but I get the imagery. I do! With you being a Leo and the most wonderful creature in all the land. This, I do not joke about.

I have a sneaking suspicion that you look adorable, hot even, but I will curse the stylist along with you.

I LOVE YOU and not just because you have a brick-shit house ass. I don't even know what that means.
stoney321
Jan. 13th, 2006 05:38 am (UTC)
I AM ASLAN AND YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO HUG MY SIDE AND WEEP FOR ME. *criez*

And Oh, My Kako... I heart you very very much and miss you. There will be phone calls this weekend! Unless you are not home? In which case there will be voice mail this weekend! :*
( 52 comments — Leave a comment )

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