?

Log in

Previous Entry | Next Entry

First request/prompt FILLED.

Oh holy crap one of my most favorite people ever is lettered Yes, Ru and Sue, I am TOTALLY cheating on you both. Her prompt: Chewbacca, masturbation drabble.

I AM SO TOTALLY PUTTING THIS BEHIND A CUT, ALTHOUGH IT IS ROMANTIC, PEOPLE.



Chewbacca watched as his lover and confidant climbed into the spacecraft and waved farewell with his walking stick. Yoda was small in stature, but in Chewie's heart, he was a giant. Speaking of giant, Chewbacca widened his stance allowing his cloaca to open, his fur-covered penis springing forth.

The breeze ruffled his fur, heightening his pleasure; his massive paw stroked his erection. As images of Yoda performing tai-chi, his voice whispering, "Love you, I do," coupled with the passion in his heart, it brought forth a pained wail as the contrailed evidence of his need stained the woodland floor.



And I welcome concrit. I'm hoping you feel I've captured their voices.

Comments

( 83 comments — Leave a comment )
tinpanalley
Feb. 2nd, 2006 11:25 am (UTC)

Soul has broken in half, but...EEE! Gilbert!!! *shoves Josie Pye out of the way while he gives Anne her much deserved stadning ovation*
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 11:28 am (UTC)
Ahahaha!! Using Gilbert Blythe for this icon is sacreligious, I know, but he's so PROUD of his Carrots!!

*trips Josie for good measure* Those Pyes.
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 11:28 am (UTC) - Expand
entrenous88
Feb. 2nd, 2006 11:30 am (UTC)
Hahahahaha!!! I think I'll never be able to watch episodes IV-VI again!

Oh, and my version of my Xander/Connor prompt is up here. :D
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 11:33 am (UTC)
SO FAST!! I only have 300 words... MUST WRITE FASTER.

*zoooooms*

(What - no concrit? :D )
... - entrenous88 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 11:36 am (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:08 pm (UTC) - Expand
beadattitude
Feb. 2nd, 2006 12:35 pm (UTC)
Oh. my.

::am both shocked and admiring::
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:04 pm (UTC)
That should be on my tombstone: both shocked and admiring. -ed. Whatever.

:D
bitchygrrl
Feb. 2nd, 2006 12:39 pm (UTC)
ROFL . . . I mean a tender and sweet portrait of unrequit- . . .No I mean ROFL.
Your brokeness(sp?) Makes me smile. :) Goes to pimp the insanity.
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:04 pm (UTC)
Hahaha! WARNING: WOOKIE WANK.

You made me laugh out loooooouuuud. Heee!
... - bitchygrrl - Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:16 pm (UTC) - Expand
sweptawaybayou
Feb. 2nd, 2006 12:49 pm (UTC)
*is speechless*

...contrail of evidence of his need stained the woodland floor.

Contrail? Contrail?

There are just ... no words.

*flails*

xoxo
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:07 pm (UTC)
Well, I asked a loooong time ago for someone to write "rooster tail of semen" or "contrails of semen" in a pull-out or masturbation fic, but no one stepped up to the challenge. I HAD TO DO IT MYSELF.

Also: I am in the middle of a Jake Gyllenhaal/Vincent Kartheiser fic and am dedicating it to you. Hopefully this is a good thing. :D
... - lettered - Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:34 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - sweptawaybayou - Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
crayonbreakygal
Feb. 2nd, 2006 12:57 pm (UTC)
That was just so dirtybadwrong. Of course, I did click, now didn't I? More, more.
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:07 pm (UTC)
Okay, this is the most cracked out one I'm doing. The others I am taking SERIOUSLY.

marlo
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:17 pm (UTC)
D:
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

::horrified::
::in an amused way::

Have you seen this?
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:38 pm (UTC)
Re: D:
LAUGH IT UP, FUZZ BALL.

(BWAH! That link is AWESOME!)
lettered
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:33 pm (UTC)
Walking Carpet/Yoda As Spastic Gerbil = OTP. 4eva.

Call me Fuzzball. DO IT. Why? Because I am. Laughing. It. Up.

Omg, so beautiful, and I demand a sequel.
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:39 pm (UTC)
Ahahahahaha!!!

No. Because you are a scruffy looking NERF HERDER.

BWEEE!!! It's the contrails that got you, right?
... - lettered - Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:43 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:44 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - lettered - Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:49 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:55 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - lettered - Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:23 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - lettered - Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:45 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - lettered - Feb. 2nd, 2006 09:31 pm (UTC) - Expand
sp23
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:37 pm (UTC)
::choke:: It's, well, it's just beautiful, man! ::sob::

his fur-covered penis

First thing that popped into my mind? Yoda hacking up a furball. Assuming, of course, that the two lovers engage in fellatio. ;P
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:40 pm (UTC)
OF COURSE they do fellatio. It took FOREVER for yoda to learn how to let the force help him relax his gag reflex.

Plus, he force choked Chewie a bunch to remind him about the courtesy tap.
cherusha
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:39 pm (UTC)
*single tear* That was beeeyoootiful!

You saw the blatant Chewie/Yoda subtext in RotS, didn't you! The REAL romance of the film! Such tragedy!
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:41 pm (UTC)
I am so wrong. WHYYYYYY do you still care for me?

*clings*
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:41 pm (UTC)
*cackles and rubs my hands together*

I AM GOING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD.
... - hellziggy - Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:42 pm (UTC)
ANNE I AM SO SORRY.
_divya_
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:52 pm (UTC)
::dies of love for you::

Chewie/Yoda! My new OTP! OMG it is so hawt!
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:42 pm (UTC)
It's the imagery, isn't it?
... - _divya_ - Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:48 pm (UTC) - Expand
mightymoosh
Feb. 2nd, 2006 01:56 pm (UTC)
*slithers over from bitchygrrl's LJ*
This was hillarious...I nearly wet myself. I was told to share this comment with you...

Did Chewie say *NaaaaaaaaaaaAAAaar* when he came.
;)
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:43 pm (UTC)
AHAHAHA!! no.

Remember when they were on the ice planet Hoth and Han was out looking for Luke, and they shut the sheild doors and Chewie howls, then follows it with: rrrhaaahn rrhaann?

Like that.
hellziggy
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:35 pm (UTC)
Wow.
0_o

Yeah, that's about all I can say right now.

Wow.

Dude, you are soooo broken inside. I think I shall have to pimp this out to my friends. They may never forgive me...
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:44 pm (UTC)
HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU PEOPLE I'M BROKEN BEFORE YOU BELIEVE ME??
... - hellziggy - Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:23 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - scubagrrl - Feb. 3rd, 2006 09:16 am (UTC) - Expand
... - hellziggy - Feb. 3rd, 2006 09:34 am (UTC) - Expand
... - scubagrrl - Feb. 3rd, 2006 09:48 am (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 3rd, 2006 10:38 am (UTC) - Expand
... - scubagrrl - Feb. 3rd, 2006 02:13 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:53 pm (UTC)
And I hope you know JUST HOW I said "JEsus Christ" outloud, because yes, I do read all of my comments out loud. WHAT.

Speaking of giant...
menomegirl
Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:18 pm (UTC)
Dude. I'm speechless and very impressed.
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:24 pm (UTC)
I'm very very sorry. And also a little proud.
... - menomegirl - Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
dedra
Feb. 2nd, 2006 03:57 pm (UTC)
I do think that you captured the characters perfectly, you sick, sad woman....lol
images of Yoda performing tai-chi perfect!

WTF is a cloaca? I thought that was something that only chickens had? I didn't know that it was inter-species???

I agree with *sp23's* furball mental image, and I raise them an anal razor-burn....

GUH!
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:19 pm (UTC)
No, see the anal penetration is SOFTENED and CUSHIONED by his slickened fur.

*And don't be knocking my cloaca. Which some fish have, as well. HE IS FROM OUTER SPACE, OKAY?*
... - dedra - Feb. 2nd, 2006 07:45 pm (UTC) - Expand
paynbow
Feb. 2nd, 2006 04:16 pm (UTC)
Love you, I do

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! (but quietly becuase my roommate is sleeping. "Heather, what's so funny that you woke me up?" "Erm...a hilarious story about masturbating wookies..." ". . ." /scene)

evidence of his need stained the woodland floor

*snarffle* too funny! And now there's this mental picture that won't. get. out!

stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:18 pm (UTC)
HAHAHA!!

BEAT THAT, WORLD!
allegraconbrio
Feb. 2nd, 2006 04:35 pm (UTC)
contrails? cloaca?

and a poor pained Wookie wail. *sniff*

Fine, fine work Stoney.

:snerrrrrk:
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:18 pm (UTC)
Rrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnrrrrr.

girlpire
Feb. 2nd, 2006 05:09 pm (UTC)
dude. last weekend i met the guy who played chewbacca.

*shudder*

the cloaca makes sense, even though he's a mammal. i mean, wookiees don't wear pants, so they gotta keep it tucked up somewhere.
hellziggy
Feb. 2nd, 2006 05:15 pm (UTC)
LOL! Yes, no matter how disturbing the image Stoney gave us of Chewbacca, it is infinitely better than an image of Peter Mayhew doing the same thing. He is just not a pretty man!
... - girlpire - Feb. 2nd, 2006 07:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - hellziggy - Feb. 2nd, 2006 07:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:17 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - girlpire - Feb. 2nd, 2006 07:18 pm (UTC) - Expand
yin_again
Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:21 pm (UTC)
You have desecrated many a good word in that there drabble, my lady.

"Cloaca" in particular, and I do believe "contrail" will never recover.

There is simething so very wrong with you.
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:24 pm (UTC)
I'll assume the extra "i" is due to your lips being pursed in a mueue of distaste?

I PUT IT BEHIND A CUT!!

The thing about wookies masturbting: the fur muffles the steady *thwokthwokthwokthwokthwok*, so it helps on long, interstellar flights when the need strikes.
... - yin_again - Feb. 3rd, 2006 06:10 am (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Feb. 3rd, 2006 06:28 am (UTC) - Expand
ely_jan
Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:42 pm (UTC)
OMGLOVESOPURECAPSLOCK

I don't know if it's your work, or the bottom of the bottle I'm reading this through, but I've never been so moved.

*bites lip*
stoney321
Feb. 2nd, 2006 06:56 pm (UTC)
*gently holds the forest litter with Wookie spunk sparkling like fresh dew to your sensitive nose*

Breathe it in. Taste the rainbow. For it is the smell of love.
... - ely_jan - Feb. 2nd, 2006 07:12 pm (UTC) - Expand
fish_23
Feb. 5th, 2006 03:34 am (UTC)
Chewoda forever! or Yeacca, which is kind of the noise I'm making thinking of them having sex. Sorry, making love.

F'ing beautiful man! *thumps heart*
stoney321
Feb. 5th, 2006 07:04 am (UTC)
Rrrrrrrrraaaaahhhhhhhhhhnnnnnn haahhhhhnnnnnrrrrrr.
stretfordditto
Oct. 12th, 2006 03:01 pm (UTC)
OMg! Lmao.
stoney321
Oct. 12th, 2006 03:04 pm (UTC)
*hands you your ass for safe-keeping* Put that on ice so the doctors can sew it back on.

Hee! Thanks for coming by and laughing.
( 83 comments — Leave a comment )

Tags

Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

Time Wot It Is

April 2017
S M T W T F S
      1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30      
Powered by LiveJournal.com