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I have a MILLION things I want to talk about/ask/etc. and absolutely no time to do it. I've missed birthdays (Szandara, my lovely MARI, aka dusty273 - ACK!) and I'm supposed to meet another stroller jogger in fifteen minutes, then my INLAWS to help them plan a new garden (oh, god - if no one hears from me by this afternoon, the MIL has killed and eaten me) and then I have to research summer activities because I suck and have JUST REALIZED my children will be out of school as of FRIDAY.

Also- my head is swimming with tales of college, courtesy of Floweringjudas (see? I don't even have time for HTML!), which will give me laughs all day long. And I'm making NOTE CARDS for my panel at WriterCon - Bringing the Funny: EVERYONE COME, omg!! because I am so excited to talk about FUNNY WRITING and may be overdoing it, eep.

GAAAAAAAAH!! (chicken + head cut off = me) Comment with a soothing story to CALM ME DOWN, OMG. Or something funny so I get super amped and EXPLODE. That may be better for mankind at this point.... *bounces*

(also: Darthanne killed and BROUGHT HOME a jackrabbit. THANKS. Now I have to bleach my back porch. EWWWWWW. Not bunny, JACKRABBIT. Holy crap.)


( 25 comments — Leave a comment )
May. 24th, 2006 06:55 am (UTC)
You have the killingest cats I have ever seen. A JACKRABBIT?!?!?! Damn.

Rascal has been all about the kill lately. There was a birds nest on our fence with three baby birds in it. One fell out and Rascal grabbed it. I was able to get it free and it seemed to be doing fine, but Mama Bird attacked us both. There's another bird who is without fear. He uses Rascal's water dish and watches Rascal, who is in his hunting stance, the whole time. He hasn't been caught yet, but I have had to clean up three dead birds in the last month.
May. 24th, 2006 11:55 am (UTC)
THE KILLINGEST. She is named Darthanne for a REASON. Yipes.

Rascal!! Noooooo! *loves Rascal, all the same*
May. 24th, 2006 06:58 am (UTC)
A little ball of fluff perched on Dawn's knee, curled up into a tight black ball. Dawn was holding unnaturally still, focused on the book balanced on her other thigh -- but her eyes kept flickering. A few words, then a glance, then another few words. Then a glance.


Dawn very carefully did not jerk at the sound of Tara's voice. "Hi." Her eyes were still red-rimmed, a permanent feature by now, her nose flushed from blowing it too often. She'd lost a little of the pasty color, though, pink riding high in her cheeks as her gaze slipped back down to her left knee.

"What're you reading?" Tara moved carefully, not wanting to bump either occupant of the bed; the aging mattress jostled easily. "Is that homework?"

"Willow gave it to me. It's a book on meditation."

That explained the lotus position she'd folded her flexible body into, at least. Tara tried not to be jealous. "That's good. Meditation can be really helpful, Dawnie."

Dawn nodded, more the suggestion of the motion so not to shake her body too much. "She's so warm," she said, faintly like she wasn't aware that she was speaking aloud. "And her heart beats so fast."

Tara smiled and folded her hands in her lap. Miss Kitty loved being petted, of course, but Tara didn't want to do anything to disturb her. She'd been trying to get her to go to Dawn for a week, now - the one real downside to cats as opposed to dogs who would've sensed Dawn's sadness and gone to her unprompted - and she wasn't going to risk destroying this tableau.

"She's still little," Tara said. "Just a baby, really. She won't be a year old for, um, another month."

"Can we have a party for her?" Food had become something Dawn only flirted with, her face losing the plump curve of baby fat, thinning into something older, more somber. But right then, she looked as young as Miss Kitty Fantastico, an innocent who wanted only to be reassured.

Carefully, Tara reached out to stroke Dawn's hair, starting at her forehead the way she'd seen Buffy do, once upon a memory. "Definitely a party."
May. 24th, 2006 12:02 pm (UTC)
*sniffles* For me?!


I love how motherly Tara is when you write her. So hugable and loving and trusting, and it makes me feel oodles better. Lovely. Thank you, my sweet!
May. 25th, 2006 06:38 am (UTC)
Is for you, love although, okay, I cleaned it up and reposted it so it's better, but yes, still for you

*love you liek whoa*
May. 24th, 2006 07:35 am (UTC)
For a moment I thought Darthanne was you MIL. Stoney, I thought your MIL killed and brought home a jackrabbit -- presumably so you could cook it for her.

Okay, I go put paper bag over my head again.
May. 24th, 2006 11:56 am (UTC)

My MIL wouldn't be able to kill me with physical means. She'd whine and complain and fret until I hung myself. :D

Heeee! *makes you tea*
(Deleted comment)
May. 24th, 2006 11:57 am (UTC)
GAH. MIL rode in the backseat with Em (so I could navigate with FIL) and she GASPS every time he changes lanes, or cries out, "Watch out, -FIL-! A ___ on the ___!" With FEAR. All the time fear.

FUCK!! We are NOT GOING TO DIE, unless you don't SHUT UP and let him CONCENTRATE on driving!!

Ahem. Sorry. :D
May. 24th, 2006 10:18 am (UTC)
Will MIL bury you in her backyard? hehehe We'll pray for your safety.

Ewwww. Jackrabbit? Bad kitty. Yuck. *hands you a scrub brush*

The kids will be out on Friday? You poor soul. We still have a few more weeks. Then older son, teenager, will be at home with me most of the summer. I may just have to lock him up in his room if he drives me crazy.
May. 24th, 2006 11:58 am (UTC)
I am not dead! I didn't commit suicide after being in her presence!

What is the DEAL with this early release?!?! Let them go through June, then start up after Labor Day! (I think they're going to move back to that next year, whew!)
(Deleted comment)
May. 24th, 2006 12:01 pm (UTC)
Darthanne is TINY. Like, she was obviously the runt of a stray cat's litter, and never got very big. Like... a bit bigger than a Chihuahua. And she has a murderous raging FIRE within that must be sated! WOW.

Tooth Fairy! We finally gave up and just give the kids money, without the pretense. Mostly because I kept forgetting to "play TF." Because I suck at motherhood.

As for Summer stuff... tennis, swimming, golf for the boy, Invention Camp in July, which should be fun, and LOTS and LOTS of trips to the library and pool. And "quiet, in your room alone" time so mommy doesn't go on a murderous Darthanne-esque killing spree. :D
(Deleted comment)
May. 24th, 2006 12:54 pm (UTC)
Yes! Camp Invention! We've also done "Kidz Science" which was a MONSTER hit. Dinosaur camp! NICE.

Honestly, I hate a lot of planned activities in the summer. I suck. I'm a big believer in kids having a lot of downtime in the summer months. We have friends who are NEVER HOME during the day. Class after class after class... I feel terrible for their kids! They never get to just hang out and lay around and dream and talk and be little. (Not to say you are doing that at all. You know what I'm talking about, I'm sure.)

And yes, Darthanne may very well be otherworldy. (She climbed our 8 foot security fence with it in her JAWS. Then laid under the trampoline and went to town. Ewwwww.)
(Deleted comment)
May. 24th, 2006 01:20 pm (UTC)
Ooooh. Good idea with the "nanny." We call those "mother's helpers" and tend to be girls old enough to be good with kids, but maybe not old enough to watch your kids without an adult? Like 11 - 13?

We are three blocks from the pool, so we walk there and hang out A LOT in the summer. Tennis is a few blocks further, and it's a two-week class, then opened to "graduates" in a block. Golf is a weekend activity with dad at Hank Haney. Otherwise, books, trampoline, kids on the street that happen to be home.

Oh, and Cartoon Network. :D
May. 24th, 2006 01:29 pm (UTC)
Oh, one last thing: if you think of it, check out Lynn Miles' CD, Love Sweet Love. I think you'd really like her. Clear, sweet voice, a little folksy, little country-ish.

May. 24th, 2006 01:24 pm (UTC)
Sorry about your back porch, but as I am surrounded by masses of wild rabbits that destroy gardens, I say Hooray for the Kill-Cat of Doom. Although, at least my kitty has the manners to store his leftovers under the porch.
May. 24th, 2006 01:27 pm (UTC)
No, no, let me be clear. I Loooooooove my evil cat. I'm a gardener, and enjoy my plants more than I feel they need to nibble on them.

Just... nothing like finding entrails at your back door first thing, is all. Bleh. (I know she's telling me she loves me, but glech.) :D
May. 24th, 2006 02:24 pm (UTC)
I never doubted that you loved your kitty. I figure if you were bothered by the death of a ferocious, garden-nibbling fiend, then you would have said something to the effect of "ooh, poor bunny" instead of pointing out it was a hare and now you need to remove bloodstains. Perhaps I should have used some sort of cheerful emoticon... :D

Though, entrails? Eww. Here's hoping you didn't step in them.
May. 24th, 2006 02:54 pm (UTC)
It's 07.20 here and I'm all bleary and checking my flist before a conference with the bricklayers and breakfast. I'm nowhere near up to speed for your glarghing torrent! Half my brain is still in my still-warm, flannel-sheeted bed, all soft and toasty and dark.

School holidays start this week? Holy cow! When do they go back? When I was in school in the US we broke up near the end of June, not May!
May. 24th, 2006 03:02 pm (UTC)
*sends some of our very, very hot weather your way*

This new school district we're in breaks at the end of May, then starts back up in AUGUST. Unholy. Enough people have raised a ruckus, the new year will begin after Labor Day (first of September) and close in June, mid-to-late. Which is AS IT SHOULD BE!

*refreshes your coffee*
May. 24th, 2006 09:15 pm (UTC)
Seeing you on a panel at Writercon is reason enough to attend, that's for sure!

I'll try not to snicker too loudly at the stroller-jogging as I sit on my ass eating pizza. Yummy.

p.s. My icon isn't directed at you. I just never get to use it and figured it wouldn't offend you.
May. 25th, 2006 05:39 am (UTC)
Snickering at yourself, right? Snickering at yourself? :D Puh. I have a kick-ass jogging stroller! Shocks, ATV wheels, one hand steering, we ROCK the block! Hahaha!

(Of course not! I have icons I never get to use, either. *displays one*) Yay!! Can't wait to see you at WriterCon!
( 25 comments — Leave a comment )


Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

Time Wot It Is

April 2017
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