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Pirates and my To Do list

I don't think I'm wanting to see the new Pirates movie after all the hinting around online. floweringjudas? I think I'm with you. (Except for boycotting HP7 - are you insane? Hahaha, I kid.) DO NOT SPOIL ME, PEOPLE, OR I WILL GO BANANAS. But seriously, Norrington was the most fleshed out character (taking in to consideration the deleted scenes, which UNFORTUNATELY, we fangirls have to, thanks Ted-n-Terry) in the whole series. And... they forgot who their characters were! We had hope in Dead Man's Chest that more of Norrington's nobility and sense of honor would be showcased after all: he's the Han! (Sometimes Sparrow is the Han, I mean, he even has a bucket of bolts! Ahahaha. Ahem.) If you'll indulge me for a minute (or scroll on by) here's why Norrington is ESSENTIAL to the plot/themes:



  • Without a moral compass (Norrington) you have no reason to care what motivates the pirates/their actions.

  • Without Norrington and his sense of duty (to the subjects of the crown), there's no counter to Sparrow's sense of duty (and he has one - it's to himself.)

  • Norrington and Sparrow are on the same coin - opposite sides, but the same coin

  • Honestly, I don't think anyone freaking CARES if Will/Elizabeth struggle to "make it work." AGAIN. We all know they'll be the Happily Ever After and we'll sigh and roll our eyes when it happens (or bite our lips if Orlando is half naked and sweaty.) That was accomplished better than anything that can be done in this movie by Norrington sacrificing his own happiness for her sake in PotC1.

  • You can't have snarky banter without Norrington being true to his sense of duty and Sparrow niggling at that. They're the Angel/Spike of the pirate world!

  • Norrington is almost as accomplished with the blade as Will is (in canon), so you can't have an awesome duel without Norrington. See: rolling ball sword fights part one and two in DMC.

  • JACK. DAVENPORT. I'm sorry, sometimes I like to say his name loudly. Then watch scenes from This Life where he's naked and tied to a bed. Rawr.

  • Big explosions do not equal big moments. Give us the kiss we know has been building between Sparrow and Norrington for years, thanks. Hahahahaha. RIGHT. >:(



I'm going to get my heart broken, aren't I? Damn you, Ted-n-Terry. Well, that's why we have fanfiction, huh? *sticks to PotC tags online, woe*



  • make ortho appointment for the boy
  • clean the house - no really, Laura. Stop reading books/frittering about. CLEAN.
  • oppress by existing DONE.
  • read a book and ignore the housework
  • finish that bad flower bed and get the plants in before you leave on vacation
  • get Em new shoes
  • walk Sally BoBally
  • turn in that FREAKING COREYS MOVIE TO NETFLIX, sheeeeesh. I mean, I've had it for MONTHS. How sad am I? Don't answer that.
  • call Tiff - catch up
  • finish The Sopranos - OMG DON'T SPOIL ME, I've only seen three episodes of this last stretch, gaaaaaah!
  • walk away from the computer NOW.

  • Now. DO IT.



Finally, MY MOST FAVORITE MACRO EVER EVER, AHAHAHAHAHA.

Comments

( 43 comments — Leave a comment )
pernickety
May. 24th, 2007 01:59 pm (UTC)
Yesterday I was counting down minutes till the movie comes out and after an hour online today I try to ignore that it even exists. Why do the writers hate Norrington so? Built him up just to tear him down. Grrr...

*is oppressed by your existence* You can put a check mark next to that one already. :D
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 02:05 pm (UTC)
I KNOW. I wish I hadn't clicked anything on LJ. BAH.

NORRINGTON!! Why would they initially create such a great character, and then... LEAVE HIM ON THE WAYSIDE?! GAH.

*checks off one thing from my list, ha ha!*
moosesal
May. 24th, 2007 02:19 pm (UTC)
I don't think you can fully cross off that third item yet. I don't feely thoroughly oppressed.

And OMFG, the Piv is in Lucas? I didn't remember that. Holy shit.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 02:22 pm (UTC)
*WORKS HARDER AT OPPRESSING YOU OMG*

Hahahahaha, I just said the SAME THING!! Heee! <3
moosesal
May. 24th, 2007 02:24 pm (UTC)
OMG you are sooooooo mean. Stop oppressing me or I'll start some wank.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:16 pm (UTC)
HAHAH, TOO LATE. I've been called an asshole and bitch for ONE WHOLE WEEK, whatev.
moosesal
May. 24th, 2007 03:21 pm (UTC)
Oh please. You know you'll be devastated when I defriend you. You won't know how to continue living.

And since I'm a nice girl, I won't defriend today because I wouldn't want to be the reason you kill yourself.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:25 pm (UTC)
Pssssh, I have SOOOOO many other reasons to kill myself, like I would REALLY WORRY about you, whatev.

*cuts your name into my thigh to feel ALIVE*
moosesal
May. 24th, 2007 03:42 pm (UTC)
OMG, UR totally OBSESSED with me. You're carving MY name into your thigh. You're like totally in love with me or something. You can't deny it.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 04:02 pm (UTC)
I am carving your name into my flesh so I can cut it OFF and BURN IT.

(Ahahaha, the Slow Clap just happened on Lucas! HEEE.)
moosesal
May. 24th, 2007 04:05 pm (UTC)
(As I watched, I was reminded of how annoyed I was about him not having his helmet strap attached and that they let him run around with the helmet falling off. Bad refs!!)

You know you love me. You want to do me, baby.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 04:07 pm (UTC)
And how many miles away are you? HENCE THE CARVING AND BURNING IN FRUSTRATION.

(Ooooh, I'm looking forward to watching it - I went on a walk with Sally Derg and only caught the intro/ending. LUCAS!\o/)

A great titleboard for the end of that movie would read: And no nerd was ever bullied again!
moosesal
May. 24th, 2007 04:26 pm (UTC)
Man, if only. I remember seeing this and having hope that life wouldn't be so bad. I was such a nerd. I'm always amazed when people say they'd love to go back to high school or whatever. Me? No way. I wouldn't go back in time to any earlier than age 25 and even that I'm not sure about.
beer_good_foamy
May. 24th, 2007 02:37 pm (UTC)
finish The Sopranos - OMG DON'T SPOIL ME, I've only seen three episodes of this last stretch, gaaaaaah!

This is me not spoiling except to say that there ARE things to spoil. Seriously. It's a huge fuckin' boulder rolling towards the finish line, slowly but crushing everything in its path.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:26 pm (UTC)
I KNOW! Someone has unfortunately) spoiled me to a BIG MOMENT, but I know nothing about how we get there, etc. AND I DON'T WANT TO KNOW. I'm spoiler free girl. *bites nails*
kurukami
May. 24th, 2007 02:45 pm (UTC)
(or bite our lips if Orlando is half naked and sweaty.)

Actually, I was hoping more that we'd be seeing Keira half naked and sweaty, but I'll take what I can get. *grin*

And you're so right concerning Norrington. It just won't be the same if he, and his tarnished honor and sense of duty, aren't there. But I've seen no spoilers at all, so... *crosses fingers*
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:28 pm (UTC)
Keira does nothing for me - I'm more a Kate Winslet girl. *g* (honestly, until Orli was tied up and beaten, he did nothing for me as a pirate, either. Now, as an elf? Heee!)

NORRINGTON!! Oh, my Commodore... I'm staying spoiler free, I just don't like all the ominous cut tags appearing on my flist, eeek!
kurukami
May. 24th, 2007 04:39 pm (UTC)
I used to be drawn to Kate Winset, but not so much now as I used to be. And I've had a crush on the Natalie Portman phenotype for a while now -- lean, decently muscled, high-cheekboned, and not an anorexic skinny-armed fashion model -- since I was a youthful teenager. *grin*

Besides, I can totally see Keira as a kicking-ass-and-taking-names elf. ; )
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:29 pm (UTC)
I'm going to see it, too, I'm just going to be prepared to find fanfic that soothes me after. EEEEP. *sticks fingers in ears* I don't wanna know I don't wanna know....

Oh, IF ONLY. We're leaving Sunday morning, and I cannot leave this house in such disarray, you know? Geh. Why did I buy new running shoes instead of hiring a maid!? ;)
cityphonelines
May. 24th, 2007 02:54 pm (UTC)
You can't have snarky banter without Norrington being true to his sense of duty and Sparrow niggling at that. They're the Angel/Spike of the pirate world!

I DARE you to write that. I wants me a Angel/Spike pirate story.

clean the house - no really, Laura. Stop reading books/frittering about. CLEAN.

Seriously, you and me? Same boat. But it's a lovely boat. Possibly a yacht.

oppress by existing DONE.

OPPRESSOR!! *throws you in opinion!prison*
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:31 pm (UTC)
Shoot, if I have an idea pop in the old noggin, I'd TOTALLY write that! (You might like the long SParrington gen fic I wrote last year - You Had a Charming Air All Cheap and Debonair - it's very cat and mouse S/A. *g*)

I need OFF the boat because I'm getting to where I'm embarrassed to open the door. YICK.

<3
crevette
May. 24th, 2007 03:11 pm (UTC)
We all know they'll be the Happily Ever After

Actually, no. I think what happens to them is tragic in a way.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:32 pm (UTC)
IRENE I AM SPOILER FREE!!!!!

And if you mean "tragic" because Orli isn't writhing under (or over) YOU? I AGREE.
crevette
May. 24th, 2007 03:45 pm (UTC)
I AM NOT TELLING YOU ANYTHING ELSE!!!

And, well, yeah. Because once the Stockholm Syndrome sets in, he'll be HAPPY, DAMNIT!
floweringjudas
May. 24th, 2007 03:18 pm (UTC)
I mean everyone on my flist who's seen it already has sounded fuckin' DEPRESSED. Which. THEY'RE PIRATE MOVIES. THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SWASHBUCKLING AND FUN, NOT THE UNBEARABLE LIGHTNESS OF FUCKING BEING.

I'm sorry, I'm really hacked off. And it's not just the Norrington thing (though it's mostly the Norrington thing). It just sounds like they've sucked all the JOY out of the characters and the show, and that's what I loved so much about the first two, the WHEEEEE! rollercoastery vibe of them.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 03:33 pm (UTC)
YES YES YES YES!!! I don't like hearing the woe coming back. ACK.

Good hell, did they forget the brilliant shot of Sparrow on his ship (boat) and it's SINKING? The fun? The glee? THE DONKEY? *cries*
floweringjudas
May. 24th, 2007 03:40 pm (UTC)
*hugs* THE DONKEY. The drunken BLACKSMITH! The EUNUCH JOKES! "I dated a eunuch!" The code being more guidelines than actual rules, AND UNDEAD MONKEY, and the two Abbott & Costello-y redcoat guys (who were so much funnier than Pintel & Ragetti, come on), and Jack needing his hat, and Will saying "AVAST!"

WHAT HAPPENED. *tears of anguish*
crevette
May. 24th, 2007 03:46 pm (UTC)
the two Abbott & Costello-y redcoat guys

I hear they're in this one, actually.
thepiratequeen
May. 24th, 2007 03:54 pm (UTC)
HI!

AND ARGH!

And I will see the movie on Friday b/c I suck like that. Jack Davenport is the kind of name that needs to be said loudly. I do it quite often myself.

And now I'm off to continue planning the bridal shower of dooooooom.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 04:01 pm (UTC)
I will most likely see it, too, because I need closure! Also, JACDAV, hello.

Ooooooh, GOOD LUCK!
lynnenne
May. 24th, 2007 04:00 pm (UTC)
You exist, yet I do not feel oppressed. I'd say your work is NOT done.

Or maybe you don't really exist! *checks for sockpuppets*
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 04:03 pm (UTC)
I WILL GET BACK TO THE OPPRESSION.

*hides my thirteen other journals that always comment with LOVE*

I MEAN, ignore those asterisks...
a2zmom
May. 24th, 2007 04:50 pm (UTC)
I know nothing about PoC3 other than this one makes the last one look like a model of coherancy.
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 04:57 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I'm almost surprised to not see: MICHAEL BAY or JERRY BRUCKHEIMER across the credits. o_0
demonqueen666
May. 24th, 2007 05:15 pm (UTC)
Yes yes yes and YES to your many "Why I Need Norrington Like I Need Oxygen" list reasons (especially the banter. and, uh, the naked Jack Davenport). I haven't been spoiled and REEEALLY don't wanna be because the "spoilers" that came out in Round One: The First Spoiling (aka RIGHT AFTER the second one came out *rolleyes*) had me terminally depressed and DEAD INSIDE. So right now I'm plastering on a smile, content that NOTHING can be as bad as all that.

(Plus: BARBOSSA. AND TIA. AND PINTEL & RAGETTI. How can that NOT be made of awesome??)

Oh, and I am totally going to be seeing the movie with my Renn Guild members. For FREE. In my pirate garb. So I PWN ALL OF YOU NEENER NEENER XD
stoney321
May. 25th, 2007 01:01 pm (UTC)
We're going to sneak out in an hour or so and see it, too, WHOOOO! Oh, JACK. I'm prepared for anything they throw at me - my Norrington love will not waver!

Have fun, yourself!
harmonyfb
May. 24th, 2007 07:13 pm (UTC)
Deleted scenes from this film, or from one of the previous films? ::lives under rock::
stoney321
May. 24th, 2007 09:01 pm (UTC)
*slips you cookies and booze under the rock*

The deleted scenes mainly from PotC1, and a few from PotC2. Norrington had far more depth of character (and an actual arc!) based on that.
harmonyfb
May. 24th, 2007 10:34 pm (UTC)
Oooo. Got a link?
stoney321
May. 25th, 2007 12:03 am (UTC)
You know, I have no idea if they're online! I've just watched them over and over on the DVDs. I'll go check YouTube...

:*
elessil
May. 25th, 2007 10:45 am (UTC)
*squees at your Jamie list*
stoney321
May. 25th, 2007 01:02 pm (UTC)
Oh, JAMES. *clings to him* I'm off to see AWE in a few. MEEP!!
( 43 comments — Leave a comment )

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Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

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