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D'oh!

The mystery to the inability to keep the internet working at my house was solved today. Four and a half years this took. GAH. (Answer: our home security system. The guys that set it up forced the system to bypass the phone lines so if a burglar broke in and took the phone off the hook/cut the line, that wouldn't prevent the security company from being notified. Well, that's nice and all, but it's screwing up our home phone and internet, which we use far more than our lovely answering dudes at the security office. So. Resolved.)

1. I slammed the tip of my middle finger in my husband's truck so badly that my whole finger turned BLACK within minutes. That is some seriously bad pain, and I've delivered a baby naturally and passed a kidney stone. Tonight is the first time I've been able to use my finger. Well, in the manner for which it was intended. (That sounds dirty. I didn't mean it to...)

2. An old high school boyfriend caught up with me from Facebook today, and I'm STILL glowing. Here's why (Kita: OH. MY. GOD.) He looks like Vincent Kartheiser from "Another Day in Paradise." That scene? Where's he's walking in the leather jacket and smoking? That's how he looked in high school. He sent me a picture of him, just taken on a trip to Amsterdam, and he looks THE EXACT SAME. But you know, in his 30s. *bites fist* Now, I'm not saying I'm going to cheat on my husband. I'm just saying that in my fantasy world, Vincent Kartheiser in the form of one of the nicest and sexiest guys I ever dated, thinks I'm hot and wants to "hook up for drinks" some time and catch up, I do. Cheat. But only in the fantasy world, honest engine! Ahahaha. Ahem. *tugs collar*

3.



HAHAHAHAHAHA! It's subtle, if you're not getting it. Bill Stickers is innocent! [/random]


4. I owe emails to Lee and Sue - they're coming! (Sue: I didn't get the package mailed in time because a) I suck and b) I found... something that needed to go in. It's going out tomorrow. *g*)

5. There's a salon at my gym and I got my hair done after a workout today and I feel faaaaaaaabulous. Life, although unbearable hot currently, is pretty sweet, y'all.

[ETA] 6. Because I'm forgetful. LYNNE: I watched something earlier this week that has had me think of you over and over, because I know you would laugh and quote with me: "I AM NATURE'S GREATEST MIRACLE!!!" (I know you're not a fool, because my mother taught me never to kiss a fool! ...Karl!)

Comments

( 44 comments — Leave a comment )
kita0610
Jul. 21st, 2008 11:42 pm (UTC)
#2- OMG PHOTOS PHOTOS PHOTOS PHOTOS PHOTOS.

HOLY SHIT, woman. PHOTOS.

Edited at 2008-07-21 11:43 pm (UTC)
stoney321
Jul. 21st, 2008 11:57 pm (UTC)
Kita, I may have moaned when I opened his picture. It hitme like a ton of bricks: I FIND THIS HOT. AND HAVE FOR 20 YEARS. Ungh.

I'll put them up in a locked post soon. Rawr.

(He's an artist. He sculpts women's bodies. *passes the fuck out*)
kita0610
Jul. 21st, 2008 11:58 pm (UTC)
OH MY FGOD.
thebratqueen
Jul. 21st, 2008 11:52 pm (UTC)
Have you seen the Robot Chicken where they cover how does the Kool-Aid man handle it when he's outside?
stoney321
Jul. 21st, 2008 11:58 pm (UTC)
That sounds so familiar... I'm going to YouTube RIGHT NOW.

OH YEAH.
brunettepet
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:00 am (UTC)
Thank goodness the internet mystery is finally solved. That's been frustrating.

Yikes to the finger. Why do we get so distracted when closing tailgates or heavy ass doors? I have a tendency to catch my baby toes on table and dresser legs. It's not like the furniture hasn't been in the same damn place for a decade or more!

Hahaha! How would you even fashion that costume. I have short arms and legs, but a hand made outfit would be a mean feat of engineering.

Oh, and I'm with the above comment. PICTURES!
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:05 am (UTC)
Isn't that crazy that in almost five years, that turned out to be the answer? At least it's solved, yeesh!

As for the finger, his door has a hinge that lets it open to a certain point, and my finger was caught on the edge of the door and the side-view mirror of the car parked next to it. *cries*

Pictures will come!
fiveandfour
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:01 am (UTC)
That picture is hilarious - I love it!

And, oh, I'm so glad we still get to be master of our own thoughts and fantasies and can take ourselves off to happy fantasy realms that have no basis in reality whatsoever (in one of my alternate universes, I know just what to say *at the moment I need to say it*), then come on home to ourselves. It can be both a way to relieve the stresses of daily living and come to understand all the ways in which you are truly blessed. Fantasies are necessary.
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:06 am (UTC)
Isn't that funny? I love quick-witted people that do stuff like that.

Yes to master of our fantasy worlds! I've *cough* been thinking of all the ways that it would be acceptable for me to, well. You can see where I'm going here. *G*
southernbangel
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:05 am (UTC)
#1. Holy shit, dude!

#2. Uhm, nice. Very, very niiiiiiiiiice. (I would like some pictures, kthanx.)

#3. It took me a second but AHAHAHA.

So. M and I were talking the other day about when we can arrange a visit out to see you. (Is the thing in August still on in ATL?) I'm thinking, if you're up for it, another trip to Big Tex, and this time I won't get sick!

ILUSTONEY. <3 <3 <3
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:08 am (UTC)
1. I KNOW! Gah.
2. Holy shit, Lee. Let's just say that he was hot when we were kids and just got better looking. (Plus: he's an ironman triathlete. HELLO.)
3. Oh, Yeah!!!

It's still in ATL on that day, but I'm thinking it might be more trouble than it's worth. I TOTALLY want you two to come any time, State Fair would be great, too!! (What if I could pull off a trip there before then? Are you swamped and that's a bad idea?)

ILU LEE!! I miss you, cookie pants! <3
southernbangel
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:13 am (UTC)
If coming out for the ATL doesn't work out, maybe I (and M if her schedule allows) can come out for a quick visit (since I haven't seen you since JANUARY. THAT IS ALL KINDS OF WRONG.) in August, and then back out for Big Tex in October.

I THINK THIS PLAN COULD WORK.
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:20 am (UTC)
THAT IS ALWAYS ACCEPTABLE. ALWAYS. *grabby hands!!*
pernickety
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:06 am (UTC)
Hehe Took a while till I saw the Kool-Aid poster, but then I couldn't stop laughing for five solid minutes. :D

Ouchie finger! Your description gave me phantom pain omg
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:09 am (UTC)
HEEEEEEEEEEE!! So funny. Oh, and that was me that friended you over on Facebook, in case you were wondering who that stranger was.

My finger!! It's horrible looking even after four days. :((((

But what about YOU? You had a fantastic past few days!
marenfic
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:14 am (UTC)
Hahahaha! Hilarious pic.

I'm glad you got your internet solved sweetheart. I miss you.

ETA: YOUR FINGER! Youch. I was this close to making a tasteless joke about it, but I think I'll save it for email :)

Edited at 2008-07-22 12:15 am (UTC)
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:20 am (UTC)
I MISS YOU, TOO. Waaaah.

And pffft, I'm ALWAYS up for a tasteless joke. It's like you don't even know me!! (Um, I may need to come out there soon, just to see your face. WAAH.)
bitchygrrl
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:22 am (UTC)
1. Aww damn girl. Did you let a doctor look at that. *mothers your finger* That sounds wrong doesn't it.
2. OMG he sounds hot, but you know if you wanted to show us a pic of him I would not mind at all not even a little bit. Yes fantasies away men like that are what fantasies are made of.
5. A salon at the gym that's pretty nifty.
3. CTFU *is slow* OH YEAH!

Edited at 2008-07-22 12:23 am (UTC)
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:32 am (UTC)
Nah, it was only the tip, so all they'd do is wrap it in athletic tape. I didn't feel like paying for that. :)
2. Rawr. Possible pictures in a locked post soon. :)
3. Isn't that? And massages!! That's the next service I feel I need to take advantage of.
4. HEEEEEEEEEEE.
dovil
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:01 am (UTC)
I'M COMING IN TO YOUR HOUSE TO STEAL YOUR COMPUTER!
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:42 pm (UTC)
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

(I'm bringing it *and* my movie to NYC so we can watch it, if you want, incidentally)
dovil
Jul. 23rd, 2008 02:25 am (UTC)
I'm assuming that it's a laptop or otherwise that you've got bulging arms of muscle and generous carry on baggage rules.

Hmmmm, let me think about....YES, it goes without saying that I can't WAIT to see your movie! There better be popcorn.

Did your mangled bloody finger fall off yet? Thank god your new bootiful hair will distract people from seeing it and screaming for the baby jesus to save them. (hope it's okay, if not get one of the kids to whip something up with playdoh.)
stoney321
Jul. 23rd, 2008 02:32 am (UTC)
Yes, 'tis a laptop. I am strong, but I am not that strong.

I just had images of us being drunk and happy in NYC, btw. This may or may not be in relation to the massive portions of wine I've drunk tonight.

My finger is still intact, although hideous. If all else fails, I've loads of modeling clay and can fashion something interesting. (And smuggle my drugs! Hahaha, Mr. FBI man! I KID.)
lynnenne
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:28 am (UTC)
2. Um. Pictures? Now please?

6. Hahahahahaha. "Stand naturally, Mr. Simpson. Let it all hang out. You: Disguise it." What did you see that reminded you of me that?

*kisses your poor blackened finger*
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:43 pm (UTC)
2. I'm trying to find the best one! I mean, *I* think he's hot and looks like VK, but will you? *frets*

6. I saw that episode! Well, listened to it in the car. We were one a road trip and the kids were watching S1 on the DVD player. you are my Simpsons connection, you know. :D

And now I want an icon that has Homer screaming "I AM NATURE'S GREATEST MIRACLE!!"
mere_ubu
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:29 am (UTC)
Owww! *hands you ice pack* Feel better soon, badfinger!

Man, all that ever happens to me on Facebook is that people I never wanted to see again track me down and try to friend me. Plus my boss and all my nieces/nephews are on it, so I'm now Officially Flunking Facebook.

Hahahahaa! That would be a fabulous costume but sitting/peeing/walking through doorways would be an issue. (But not walls. Heh.)
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:44 pm (UTC)
There are streaks of flesh color showing through the ick, so I am on the mend!

I only have something like four or five people friended on Facebook. I find the forma irritating and useless, personally. I like LJ: you can communicate, instead of just sticking random shit out there, you know?
mere_ubu
Jul. 22nd, 2008 02:14 pm (UTC)
You'll be up to full bird-flipping power in no time! ::cues up Rocky theme for badfinger training montage::

I work at a college, so I'm mostly on there b/c the younguns are always like, "ZOMG, Sarah, you have to be on Facebook so I can invite you to my toga party/bake sale for the anime club/ritual sacrifice." Ah, youth. And yes, I agree that the format sucks. The Buffy trivia add-on is its only saving grace. ;)
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 03:24 pm (UTC)
Ahahahahaha, this whole comment has me laughing. YAY!!!

*puts sweats on my finger and tells it I'm gonna make it eat lightning and crap thunder!*
mere_ubu
Jul. 22nd, 2008 03:37 pm (UTC)
*lol* I want you to chase this little chicken!

I'm thinking that a teeny-tiny sweatband with "Stoney" on it is in order. We could probably just skip that whole raw egg thing, though, cause ewww. Ya can't be a champeen with salmonella!

chantal87
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:56 am (UTC)
Have I been living under a rock?? I did't know you had a facebook thingy. I have one too. I tried to find your profile. I am a dork and couldn't find it.
Mine is http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=528437876
I am just as dorky on facebook as I am in real life.

I have missed you. I'm sorry you have a black finger. That's just...well it's gross that's what it is.
I loved the picture. I can always use a giggle.
Anyhoo. I just wanted to say hey.

stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:46 pm (UTC)
HI LADY!!! *hugs you to bits* I'll friend you, and then you'll have my handle, too. :D

I have missed you, too. I'm hoping that things are starting to mellow out a bit at your end. If not, here's a silver lining for you: I bought school supplies yesterday. The end is nigh!!

<3 <3 <3
moosesal
Jul. 22nd, 2008 02:07 am (UTC)
That picture is hilarious. Sorry about your finger. Yay for the internet and VK lookalikes.

Love you.
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:48 pm (UTC)
Oh, yeah! The other thing I loved was "Punchy," from Hawaiian Punch. "Hey Punchy! How about some Hawaiian Punch!" *smacks them to give them...juice?* Yeah, that makes sense.

Love you, too! I watched a show on Colorado yesterday which meant I had you on the brain. <3 (Are you watching The Two Coreys? They were crying and holding each other in therapy. Haim was wiping tears off Feldman's cheeks with the back of his hand, like that was the norm. BECAUSE IT IS. Dude.)
moosesal
Jul. 22nd, 2008 02:03 pm (UTC)
Crying? Shit. I forgot about the damn DVR. No, I haven't been watching the Corey. Must torrent. Making myself a note now. Grr.

Hawaiian Punch is NOT juice. Sorry, Stoney, but no. Not juice. I know you don't let your kids drink that crap. Right?
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 03:23 pm (UTC)
YOU HAVE TO WATCH, OMG.

We weren't allowed to drink Hawaiian punch when I was a kid, either. It's nasty, imo. (My kids drink milk and water. Sometimes a little apple/cranberry juice or orange juice, but mostly milk and water. I'm a horrible, mean mother. *g*)
moosesal
Jul. 22nd, 2008 03:27 pm (UTC)
Hee. So mean. I drank a lot of Kool-Aid (sugar-free pink lemonade) and Pepsi (my mother was a pepsi addict for years). She did make me have milk with dinner though.

I will be torrenting all the eps. Probably will torrent s1 too just so I have them for reference. *face palm*
botias
Jul. 22nd, 2008 02:57 am (UTC)
That picture was great! Now the t-shirt:

http://www.noisebot.com/we_finally_got_him_t-shirt.htm

I have to admit, I want to see pictures too...
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:49 pm (UTC)
Hahahahahaha - I love that! Oh, funny people of the world: I love you all.

I'm trying to find the best one, actually....
kseenaa
Jul. 22nd, 2008 06:34 am (UTC)
Good to hear the internet-mystery is solved. Finally. Most feel good, no? :-)
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:49 pm (UTC)
Feels SO GOOD. I've gone through THREE modems/routers in less than a month! That's craziness!
kseenaa
Jul. 22nd, 2008 04:26 pm (UTC)
Wow.... That is indeed scary... o.O
drusplace
Jul. 22nd, 2008 12:40 pm (UTC)
Sorry about the finger. I've done that. It isn't fun.

And can I just say one thing about this post? All I can think about is how, when you posted the "Bill STickers is Innocent" post it took me a whole day TO GET THE JOKE!!! Hee!
stoney321
Jul. 22nd, 2008 01:50 pm (UTC)
Yes - it is the very opposite of fun! :(

HAHAHAHAHA - Bill Stickers. That was one of the funniest things I've cme across. Let's see:

Top Three Random Funnies:
1. Bill Stickers
2. "Look at this Fucking Dog"
and 3. OH YEAH! :D
( 44 comments — Leave a comment )

Tags

Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

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