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Waahh! Friends are gone...

Got back from taking Sue and Caza back to airport. Lots of fun was had. Drinks were poured, laughter ensued, and by the way... America! FUCK, YEAH!! If you haven't seen Team America: World Police... holy holy holy crap. So funny. I've been working on my marionette walk all day. They so perfectly spoof the boorish nature of our current government, and skewer Jerry Bruckheimer action movies so well. You know what? When marionettes puke, I laugh like a hyena.

The battery on my camera went out, so the pictures aren't the best. But you can find them here. There are 5 in all. I think I look fat. Also? Sue has the BEST HAIR IN THE NATION. Thick chestnut brown, and if I knew her better, I would have given her teeny little braids all over it. Then brushed them all out. Fabulous hair.

Our favorite fic writer has a new chapter up JUST FOR ME! Okay, probably not, but it's like she's writing for a specific audience. An audience of illiterate 13 year old boys who saw a booby once.


  • "She needed to give her pussy a rest. It was sore. The remedy required soaking in a hot tub and chocolate ice cream." It's Buffy's private version of IcyHot! But it leaves me feeling too sticky.

  • "'Are you ready for dessert, luv?' Elizabeth smiled knowing the comment had some hidden meaning." But she couldn't figure out WHAT that meaning was. Her instinct was that he was saying something dirty, but similies and metaphors are HARD. Ooh! Pretty shoes!

  • "'Let me dry you.' William started at her feet, kissing and licking her toes." I don't know about you, but being licked dry is HAWT. Because you don't get dry. And having the opposite of what you think is going to happen ACTUALLY happen... That is fucking awesome. But sticky. And then you smell like breath.

  • "'I love your beautiful cock.' 'And I love your sweet cunny...'" A/N: note to self... look up obscure regionalisms and insert often. Make sure they are NOT sexy words to keep the readers on their toes.




And now from the author's Angelus/Faith fic

  • "He plunged into her without direction." Talk about an eyeful/earful/ass load! Ba dum bum ching!

  • "I may be a vampire, but I'm still a man." Well... technically no. You are either one or the other.

  • "I remember the first time I saw her. My cock jumped up in my throat." Dear Santa Claus, I would like to have a man under my tree with a cock that reaches to his own mouth while standing so I don't have to be bothered on "headache night" anymore to suck it for him. I've been a very good girl this year. Signed, Stoney




Buffy looked at William's [object from a boat, meaning his penis]. William [action verb] at her. Buffy [liquid, used as a past tense verb] in her pants. William said, "[come-on line not even a 16 year old boy would use to a prostitute]." Buffy spread her [body part] while William commented on it's [adjective].

"[child's interpretation of love talk]"
"[idiot's repsonse]"

William put his [body part, described in metaphor] on her [genitalia, as referred to in similie] while exclaiming, "[horribly inappropriate fishery terminology]."

*Truck pulls up with Buffy's shipment of Gatorade and Astro-glide, our two lovers motion the crates to the kitchen, and continue [verb to describe sex act, preferably in the words of a German tourist visiting the Grand Canyon for the first time.]*

So that's really hard. There IS talent there. A weird and strange talent, but it's there. Somewhere...

Comments

( 37 comments — Leave a comment )
cityphonelines
Oct. 23rd, 2004 05:33 pm (UTC)
I think I look fat
Big.As.A.House. Nah, you're all very lovely and not at all one dimesional stick figurey looking. Nope. Not at all.

Nerd.

Is your kidlet having Caza withdrawal symptoms?



stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 05:39 pm (UTC)
She was when they left, according to Mr. Stoney. However, he gave her some ice cream and she promptly forgot her new friend. That was evil of him. (I think he was getting a little jealous of how enamored with Caza wee Emily was becoming...)

I don't have black hair, BTW. I don't know why my camera does that. It's light brown with blonde streaks! Weird.
cityphonelines
Oct. 23rd, 2004 05:47 pm (UTC)
Must be a glare or somethin'. Trick of light sort of thing.

And, y'know, call me crazy, but I've never seen a beautiful cock in my like. They're kinda... not beautiful as a rule. But Eau de Breath is the new Chanel no.5, hadn't you heard?
cityphonelines
Oct. 23rd, 2004 05:48 pm (UTC)
that should be 'life', not 'like'. Someone must have changed it so it would be wrong. Hmmm...very strange...
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 06:03 pm (UTC)
The same person who screwed with my camera's batteries, to be sure.

And yeah. dicks? Not pretty. Useful. Fun. Tactile. But beautiful? Only in theory.

And I like Spit, the new fragrence by Calvin Klein.
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 05:40 pm (UTC)
Well, I've been sticking to a diet, so I think it really shows in those pics. :-) Plus, A-line dresses really help hide many flaws.

This author is my new favorite thing. It's my crack!!
(Deleted comment)
ropo
Oct. 23rd, 2004 05:48 pm (UTC)
You're a fantastic photographer! You even managed to get yourself in all the pics!
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 06:05 pm (UTC)
Oh, thank you, Mr. Dandy, for the applause! I have this SWEET tripod, and my camera has a timer. That's how I was able to be in them all. And it has a "random moment" setting, so I could take pics even while passed out. Nikkon. Check it out.

Tee Hee! Get home okay? Chi-town treat you well?
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 06:53 pm (UTC)
Zazu!!
you're raTAHded. No YOU ah.

I don't know how we were able to suspend our Charisma Nipples in the air like that. And the camera caught the image PERFECTLY. Perspective is a douche!!

YOURS!!!
(Deleted comment)
paynbow
Oct. 23rd, 2004 06:53 pm (UTC)
I can't see the pictures! I don't know why, but they don't show up *sobs* I wanna see them!!! *breaks down into a pathetic pool of goo...*

Ok, I'm gonna see if I can immitate these skills of an artist...TROGDOOOR!!!...*ahem* Wrong skills...

Buffy looked at William's shroud. William jiged at her. Buffy shat in her pants. William said, "Are you Jamaican? Cause jamaican me crazy..." Buffy spread her toes while William commented on it's width.

"I wuv woo shmoopy-bear."
"Woo is my sunshine, honey-poo!"


William put his giant cucumber on her cunt that looked like a cantelope cut in half while exclaiming, "Cor, luv-ducks! I bloody love your steak and kiney pie!"

*Truck pulls up with Buffy's shipment of Gatorade and Astro-glide, our two lovers motion the crates to the kitchen, and continue their uber-holing.*

That was kinda hard...and now I'm in her mental space! I need to go wash out my brain!
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:01 pm (UTC)
"Uber-holing?" That. Is. AWESOME!
Seriously? The link doesn't take you to villagephotos.com? See what I can do about that... TROGDOR!! Burninating the peoples in their thatched roof cottages!!! Thatched roof cottages!!! I love you a little more.

Ahhhh SNAP!! I'm Marshie!

I love your fic. You should post it and see how many people fall in love with yoru stile cuz OMFG U R HAWT. this mad me cum N mi pants.
paynbow
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:08 pm (UTC)
Re: "Uber-holing?" That. Is. AWESOME!
well, you said: verb to describe sex act, preferably in the words of a German tourist visiting the Grand Canyon for the first time. *g* I should post this story...I could probably make it longer...but that would require being in her mindspace for longer...*shudder* Of course...causing people to egress in their panties...hmmm...

The link takes me to the page, but all I see are these little red x's...it's probably my internet server *gares at Telus modem* They tend to suck...and not in the good Las Vegas way...
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:27 pm (UTC)
Re: "Uber-holing?" That. Is. AWESOME!
emailed you the pics. don't want you missing out! I am BEAUTIFUL. But I do not have black hair, like the picture makes you think...

LasVegas sucking. Mmm.
paynbow
Oct. 23rd, 2004 08:08 pm (UTC)
I SEEEEE you
Heh...great pics! You guys are soooo bu-ti-ful. Man, I wish I was that hot. I can really see that the diet is paying off! I also loved caza's soul-patch...the camera caught all the details!
elcazavampiros
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:11 pm (UTC)
Caza sad
I loved the pics. You look great!

Don't let Emily forget Caza.

I'm recumbent with my dog, Max. He enjoyed his vacation with grandma and grandpa.

crazydiamondsue and I had oodles of fun.

Pearl Harbor sucked and we miss you.
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:20 pm (UTC)
Re: Caza sad
Pearl Harbor sucked almost as much as I miss YOU!!

CazaandSue: FUCK YEAH!!
elcazavampiros
Oct. 23rd, 2004 08:51 pm (UTC)
Re: Caza sad
Gratuitous icon post
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 08:57 pm (UTC)
Re: Caza sad
Wheeee!!!!
likeadeuce
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:36 pm (UTC)
hah, those pictures really capture you guys!

have you posted the recipe for a Charisma Nipple? I'm going to the Kerry-Joss fundraiser tomorrow, and I'd like to bring uniquely Buffyverse party-items, recipes.

any suggestions, those or otherwise?
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:47 pm (UTC)
CHARISMA NIPPLE RECIPE
equal parts to be poured into shot glass:
Vanilla vodka (Smirnoff is nummy)
Bailey's
Butterscotch Schnapps

I like how Caza's mini-goatee was picked up in the pics.
lynnenne
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:38 pm (UTC)
"He plunged into her without direction."

Go left! Left! No, the other left!!! *hands him a compass*

"I remember the first time I saw her. My cock jumped up in my throat."

There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could...

stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 07:51 pm (UTC)
I can't tell you how many times I stopped and shook my head.

And LIMRICKS!! Wheee!!! (I want to see your version of the Bad!Fic mad-libs! You'll come up with some great ones...)

But what rhymes with Nantucket? Bucket? Duck hit? Oh. I see. Har!!
lynnenne
Oct. 23rd, 2004 09:09 pm (UTC)
Buffy looked at William's [sternwheeler]. William [spun it] at her. Buffy [swam] in her pants. William said, "[I'll give you half my allowance to let me swim in there with you]." Buffy spread her [channel] while William commented on its [briney ocean blueness].

"[Oh, daddy, sail into the sunset with me.]"
"[Soon as I get the mast raised, baby.]"

William put his [greek-god-like nose] on her [bobbing life-preserver] while exclaiming, "[Good God, woman, you smell like a hatchery! When was the last time you showered?]."

*Truck pulls up with Buffy's shipment of Gatorade and Astro-glide, our two lovers motion the crates to the kitchen, and continue [gape at the hugeness of the chasm in their Birkenstocks.]

Whew! That WAS hard work!
stoney321
Oct. 23rd, 2004 09:12 pm (UTC)
See what I mean? She has TALENT, baby. Those malapropisms flow from her lips like beer flows at a frat house, a frat house rife with rufies and hot young men who egress into their pants, all the way home.
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2004 08:24 am (UTC)
I'm reading your new chapter right now!!!
Fertile flow!!! I COMPLETELY forgot that one. You see, I take notes when I read her. I have so much to learn... She cross posts at SpuffyRealm and people have been giving her a lot of grief, some are trying to help her (which is terrific. She obviously LOVES writing) but most people are just being mean about it, which isn't nice.

but wait, Stoney... Isn't that what YOU are doing? Yes, but not to her face. I'm doing it to her back!
/is shamed.

I think the camera really captured my 3 year old's disdain at having strangers come over. Hee hee!!
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2004 08:42 am (UTC)
Re: I'm reading your new chapter right now!!!
I KNOW!! I saw that and immediately made a post in my LJ asking if any of those reviewers were there because of me to stop. Nothing wrong with concrit, but telling someone they are stupid? We are just having good clean fun over here with no names...

She was VERY gracious to those who insulted her. But then she immediately posted a chapter about fertile flow. And I knida can't forgive her for her menstrual fics. *shudder* Don't even go there, Jen. I read it so you don't have to.
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2004 08:51 am (UTC)
Re: I'm reading your new chapter right now!!!
two bee honest, I didt'n notice it. :-) And I am the QUEEN of tot he, so I have no room to speak. That needs to be an icon...

On this day of sacrifice, it is the least I can do. (I'm feeling the flames licking at my feet...)
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2004 11:24 am (UTC)
Are you trying to say that the pain of separation depicted in my photos is FUNNY??!! :-)

My husband is working on an invention: hit an "oh, shit!" key (to be determined by user) to pull up a spreadsheet/database/word doc to cover up any pictures of porn, or bad words, and hide the program on your task bar. Let's make naughty stuff work-safe!
jamalov29
Oct. 24th, 2004 11:14 pm (UTC)
Hi Laura, I see that you had wonderful fun with your lj friends; I wasn't able to watch the pictures.. And I was so eager to see them !
Perhaps you can fix it ?
I left home to go in the country , two hours of car driving from here.
The weather was especially nice , and we had several walks in the forest - it was a symphony of colors - , we even picked some mushrooms.
It was a nice week-end.

The children are at home for the next ten days , so I won't have free computer access as much as usual. But I will be here!
stoney321
Oct. 25th, 2004 06:14 am (UTC)
Hello! *waves*

What a lovely weekend you had. I'm looking forward to spending a week in the woods and skiing in November. Four more weeks...

Hmm. If the hotlink didn't work, try going there by this link:
http://www.villagephotos.com/viewpubimage.asp?id_10336474
violethamster
Oct. 25th, 2004 05:43 am (UTC)
You look so thin in those pictures! And both of you have fabulous hair. Although I think my favorite picture was the evil sleepy cat.

Oh, and [horribly inappropriate fishery terminology].

I think I will post all my comments in the form of Mad Libs in the future.
stoney321
Oct. 25th, 2004 06:17 am (UTC)
I have good hair. Sue's hair is FABULOUS. I'm unsure of how the rules for cyber friends work, so I resisted the urge to climb on her shoulders and dig my hands in. Little freaky? Um.... yeah.

The evil sleepy cat is EVIL!! SHe killed a bunny outside my window last night! Then walked in and laid down in a C trying to show me how sweet and non-evil she is.

I want to see your skills of an artist! Fill out the Mad-Libs portion. A couple of girls have done it and it is cracking me up! MEMEMEMEME!! Oh. YOUYOUYOUYOU!
( 37 comments — Leave a comment )

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Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

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