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*CRIES* and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Thanks SO MUCH, anelith!! Nightmares for WEEKS.

DO NOT CLICK IF BIG GIANT SPIDERS SCARE YOU. I AM NOT JOKING. Do not even think you can be mad at me if you click.

....you're totally going to click aren't you? (This makes me think of "There's a Monster at the End of This Book!" with my pal Grover.)

THAT, my friends, was what spun a web outside my front door, wanting to catch my FACE and EAT IT.

Comments

( 62 comments — Leave a comment )
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redbrickrose
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:12 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I totally clicked that despite my deep abiding arachniphobia. If that was outside my front door I would NEVER LEAVE MY HOUSE AGAIN. You're braver than me.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:15 pm (UTC)
*CLINGS!*

Waaaaaaaaah!! Isn't that awful??? I never thought of one eating a BIRD. Poor little thing. :(
lettered
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:14 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry for your face. But that *is* a really cool spider!
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:16 pm (UTC)
It is cool IN THEORY. When you have to limbo underneath its web to keep it from stabbing your eyes out and shooting a sac of eggs in the bleeding hole, it's not so cool.

(hahaha, melodrama, huh?)
enigmaticblues
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:18 pm (UTC)
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I am going to make my boyfriend promise to lay down his life in my defense against that thing or any other spider like it. Otherwise, all bets are off.

I may be a feminist, but I expect protection from nasty things like that.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:20 pm (UTC)
I MEAN ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!??!

Those pictures make my non-existant prehensile tail curl over my butt. WAAAAAH!
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:20 pm (UTC)
Me, neither!! Not a poor, pretty BIRDY!! :(
kseenaa
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:20 pm (UTC)
Ew. But also... Interesting. Must be some seriously strong web that spider spins... Hmm.... But ew. I would not like that around my house, thank you very much.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:21 pm (UTC)
Now, I'm a biologist. I appreciate their importance, their engineering, all of that.

BUT IT COULD LEAP ON YOUR FACE. Climb up your nostril and lay its babies in your sinus cavity, then your skull would explode with baby spiders! *cries and cries and cries*
... - kseenaa - Oct. 24th, 2008 08:57 pm (UTC) - Expand
lawperry
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:21 pm (UTC)
We leave all our Golden Orb Weavers up in the yard (except the ones who weave on our porch) and name them all Ursula. LOL

I had no idea they could *ever* grow *that* big. Dang!!! Birds??

I'm seriously impressed. Except for your head part. That would be unfortunate; you're pretty - as evidenced by your pic the other day! And funny, too!

I'd miss you. But I'd still be impressed by the spider. :::snerk and poke:::
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:26 pm (UTC)
They get MASSIVE here, but I've never seen that!! Then again, we have raptors and Great Horned owls, so maybe they've trained the spiders to stick to bugs...

I would miss being missed! (LOL) hogod, do not let the sharp pointy hungry spider eat my face meat....

*herds them all to your front door* ;)
... - lawperry - Oct. 24th, 2008 08:33 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Oct. 24th, 2008 08:40 pm (UTC) - Expand
tricksterquinn
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:27 pm (UTC)
I hate you so much. You know us so well.

Though I admit that was sort of REALLY COOL. As was the mouse killing the viper (and I like snakes but not spiders, so who knows?)
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:29 pm (UTC)
I SAID NOT TO CLICK!!!!

I've nto seen the mouse killing the viper! Was it all Riki Tiki Tavy getting rid of the cobra? ;)
... - tricksterquinn - Oct. 24th, 2008 08:30 pm (UTC) - Expand
kwizbit
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:35 pm (UTC)
OMG wtf, did we not just have this conversation this morning? I thought you were going to put those scarecrow tarantulas up to drive these things away! GAH!

How did you get rid of it??? The thing eats BIRDS for godsakes!!
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:37 pm (UTC)
I KNOW!! I was sent an email by a very close friend, even! And I had to share with others, because it lessens my pain.

I KNOW!! Shotgun?
mireille719
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:35 pm (UTC)
Holy cow. You know, this is why I like living in a cold climate: fewer CREEPY THINGS THAT WILL EAT YOUR EYEBALLS.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:38 pm (UTC)
I will never ever ever ever ever ever go to the Amazon rainforest. No matter how many fantastic things I'm fascinated by that exist there, I prefer discovering things in a laboratory, NOT by them leaping onto my flesh.
soundingsea
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:36 pm (UTC)
I am SO not going to click. Ugh, spiders. *shudder*
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:39 pm (UTC)
DO NOT.

Seriously. Say, how 'bout that weather? Just right for pumpkin butter, eh? ;)
... - soundingsea - Oct. 24th, 2008 08:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
chantal87
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:49 pm (UTC)
Damn it, L!
My Aunt had a big freakin' spider from hell in her garden. He had a humming bird trapped in the web. My Uncle saved the bird before the spider got to it.
Sometimes nature just fucks my shit up.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 09:08 pm (UTC)
Oh, poor hummer!! I'm so glad it was saved from the jaws of death!
bu_doodlebug
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:52 pm (UTC)
This was my thought process:

"Eh. I'm okay with spiders. Little ones. Sometimes. I'm tough. I can handle it." *click* "OMG."

Poor bird. You should buy a shotgun. I am. Good for spiders AND zombies.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 09:09 pm (UTC)
YEAH. That is a DEATH SPIDER. J, those spin webs across my fron porch EVERY YEAR. *cries*

I have a shotgun, rifle, semi, and four handguns. (Where do you think they got all the weaponry for Blood on the Highway? *G*)
heather_berry78
Oct. 24th, 2008 08:55 pm (UTC)
HOLY CRAP!
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 09:09 pm (UTC)
I KNOW!!!
thebratqueen
Oct. 24th, 2008 09:25 pm (UTC)
HOLY MOTHER OF ALL THINGS WHY DOES GOD HATE US?????
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 09:29 pm (UTC)
PROBABLY BECAUSE OF SOMETHING YOU DID!!

UNDO IT! UNDO IT!
chosen0112
Oct. 24th, 2008 09:53 pm (UTC)
Y'know what scares me more than that spider? It comes from Queensland Australia. WHERE I AM.
Eeep.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:01 pm (UTC)
IT'S CALLING FROM INSIDE YOUR HOUSE!!!!

(We have them here in Texas, too. Then again, Texas is just Australia with a different accent. *G*)
... - chosen0112 - Oct. 25th, 2008 02:26 am (UTC) - Expand
crevette
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:01 pm (UTC)
I WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:02 pm (UTC)
CONSTANT VIGILANCE!!

(Take two bricks to bed. One for your face, the other for your husband's. It pays to be prepared!)
siapom
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:01 pm (UTC)
I would never leave my room. The other rooms might be too close to the front door, and it could sneak in on the wind when someone else came in... *shudders*

And that poor birdie! :(
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:02 pm (UTC)
I am sad for the birdie, too! :(
dampersnspoons
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:04 pm (UTC)
I took this picture of your hand while you were sleeping last night. Think he'll come back this evening?
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:11 pm (UTC)
I FUCKING HATE YOU BETH.

Why do you hate me so much? I've been nothing but good to you. Except for when I threatened to flush your Barbies down the toilet.
wolfshark
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:46 pm (UTC)
AAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!


*pantpantpant*

*sobs* Why did I click????
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 11:24 pm (UTC)
I don't know!!! I told you not to click!!! *cries with you*
ruthless1
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:47 pm (UTC)
I didn't click.
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 11:24 pm (UTC)
*crowns you with the I Am Smart tiara of wisdom!*
ellid
Oct. 24th, 2008 10:53 pm (UTC)
Jesus H. CHRIST. That thing is ENORMOUS!
stoney321
Oct. 24th, 2008 11:24 pm (UTC)
i mean, it's no clocky, but I don't want this on my wall, either. YIPES.
paperdoll156
Oct. 25th, 2008 12:15 am (UTC)
Holy fuck! Here I was thinking that the tarantula outside my house was huge!

I understand the fear of giant spiders eating your face. Ever since I was little, I've had nightmares of plate size spiders coming down from the ceiling of my bedroom. I always wake up as soon as their first leg touches my face.

Ngh..sorry. *cringes*
stoney321
Oct. 25th, 2008 02:14 pm (UTC)
*ptes pets pets* :(((( Those are TERRIBLE dreams, poor baby!!
timba
Oct. 25th, 2008 12:45 am (UTC)
I am NOT going to click, but I am sorry that you had (what I am assuming) is a giant person-eating spider outside your house today.
stoney321
Oct. 25th, 2008 02:14 pm (UTC)
Not this summer, thank goodness! But they'll be back next year. *cries*

(Smart girl for not clicking!!)
samsom
Oct. 25th, 2008 01:10 am (UTC)
Why did I click? Why did I click? Why? Why? Why?

*stomps feet and shudders and shudders and shudders*

Why didn't someone put that poor birdy out of its misery? Like in the Last of the Mohicans when the English soldier takes Cora's place getting burned alive and Hawkeye shoots him to put him out of his misery? *sobs*

Poor little birdy. :(
stoney321
Oct. 25th, 2008 02:15 pm (UTC)
I was able to read the article with my hand over the picture - the bird was dead, so it wasn't sitting trapped, struggling, if that helps any.

(And hahahaha! If it *had* been, the Last of the Mohicans scenario DEF. should have happened! *starts the dramatic violin interlude*)
xochitl42
Oct. 25th, 2008 01:24 am (UTC)
I LIVE IN QUEENSLAND!

(Nowhere near that far north, but GAH!)
stoney321
Oct. 25th, 2008 02:15 pm (UTC)
BE EVER VIGILANT!!!!!

*frets*
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