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IASiP: Twins Can't Marry [kris10_icons]
ETA (I just uploaded a ton of icons for this show and I'm super happy about it, even though we are a small group, apparently. (Where's the IASiP fandom??)

Due to our ongoing ice storms here, I spent yesterday re-watching all of Seasons 3 and 4 yesterday of IASiP and this idea wouldn't go away. It's been a long time since I've wrote fic, and an even longer time since I tried to write balls-out funny fic. I got my fingers crossed on this one. Throw your boundaries out the window before reading, please. Links to watch full eps are in the A/N, btw.

Title: Dennis and Dee Go All The Way
Author: Stoney321
Fandom: It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia
Summary: The Gang will do anything for a fast buck.
Spoilers The show doesn’t really work like that, but I’d say up through the McPoyles holding the Gang hostage.
A/N: This is TV-MA, but the family that actually enjoys this sort of thing isn’t the Reynolds. Also, if you’re not watching this show, why on earth not? Is it because every single person is reprehensible, dishonest, and antagonistic? Pfft. That’s what makes it so funny. Twincest is implied, as is mutual non-con, just try and figure that out. It's nothing that isn't already implied in the show, though.





11:23 PM

* * *

On a Wednesday

* * *

Philadelphia, PA




“Hell, yeah I would.”

“Charlie, are you trying to tell me that you would drink an entire quart of motor oil for a hundred bucks?”

“Dude, I’ve done that for nothing, a hundred bucks would just be gravy.”

Charlie popped the cap off his beer on the counter top and pointed it back at Mac. “Okay, okay, your turn. Would you eat a urinal cake for a grand?”

“How much?”

“A thousand- a thousand bucks, man, would you do it?”

“Eat a urinal cake?”

Dennis came around the bar and joined Mac and Charlie at the booth.

“I don’t know about a thousand dollars, I mean, is it used?”

Charlie thought for a minute. “Yeah, it’s used. It’s a month old.”

Dennis and Mac both reared back with looks of disgust on their faces.

Mac shook his head. “No less than three thousand, I’m not an idiot.”

Dennis took a long pull off his beer and waved with his free hand. “Do me, do me. My turn.”

Mac and Charlie sat thinking for a minute; Sweet Dee came back into the bar wiping her hands. Charlie’s face lit up. “Would you do your sister for three thousand dollars?”

Dennis turned in his seat and watched his sister lean over the bar, swinging her hand back and forth to try and reach a towel laying over the bourbon bottles, her shirt soaking up a spilled beer Dennis had left on the counter.

“That’s insulting.”

Mac leaned in, intense. “Ten thousand.”

“Cash?”

Mac and Charlie looked at each other and smiled. Dee walked over and sat down next to Dennis. “What’s up, boners?”

Mac put on his business face. “Sweet Dee, what do you think about getting paid ten large to do a little something.”

“Hey!” Dennis was affronted. “Trust me, it’s not little.”

Dee ignored her brother’s preening. “What do I have to do?”



“Dennis and Dee Go All The Way“




“No way. Uh uh. That’s disgusting! Also, I think it’s illegal outside of Tennessee.” Dee got up and poured herself three fingers of whiskey, reconsidered, and dropped the shot into a mug of beer and downed it.

“Dee, you’re being selfish,” Mac joined her at the bar for another beer. “Ten grand. You’re going to throw ten grand away for what? Something dumb like not boning your brother? I’ve never heard of anything so selfish. What about us, Dee? What about our dreams? Charlie? You ever hear of anything so selfish?”

Charlie flew out of his seat and over to them at the bar. “Dee, dammit, come on! You can’t always be the useless one.”

Dee’s jaw dropped. “I am not being selfish! Besides, Dennis doesn’t do anything for me, he’s not my type.”

Dennis sauntered over to the gang and whipped his shirt off, flexing his lean but lithe torso. “Dee, that’s ridiculous. I’m every woman’s type. You’re not even making sense anymore.”

“I’m not making sense? You’re the one that wants to do me!”

“See?” Dennis laughed sadly and threw his hands in the air, then pulled his fists down, flexing his biceps. “Guys? She’s being ridiculous, right?”

“Stupid.”

“A complete dumb ass.”

“Oh, I’m the dumb ass, Charlie? I’m the dumb ass? You‘re the one that eats out of the dumpster.”

“That’s perfectly good food they’re throwing away! You‘re the one throwing away ten thousand bucks, dumb ass!”

Dennis tried to get control back of the conversation. “Dee, let’s be honest here. No one wants to ‘do you,’ least of all me. And guys,” he begrudgingly turned away from his reflection, “make it twenty Gs and I’m in.”

“No! Nobody’s in! Nobody’s getting in!”

Mac patted her shoulder in what he thought was a soothing manner. “They haven’t for a long time, have they?”

“That’s not true, I-”

“Hey what are we talking about here?” Frank walked in, zipping his pants up.

Mac moved over to make room for him. “Dennis is going to bang Sweet Dee for twenty large.”

Frank adjusted his glasses, his gaze fixed on his former children. “Who’s your agent?”


*****


Dee tossed her empty coffee cup into a trashcan on the street corner. Charlie threw his behind his shoulder without looking.

“Hey!” some stranger yelled out.

“All I’m saying is, you’ve gotta keep an open mind about this.”

“Oh, I need an open mind.”

“Yes, that’s what I’m saying.”

“I need an open mind. You want me to bone my brother. That’s sick!”

“Was it sick when Leia kissed her brother?”

“Actually, yes. His face was all jacked up.”

“Okay, then, was it sick when Princess Diana had those two mutants with Prince Charles?”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

Charlie stopped in his tracks. “Aren’t they brother and sister?”

“No!”

“I thought all those royal types were like, related and that’s why they looked like that…”

Dee rolled her eyes and kept walking. Charlie caught up with her at the next street corner.

“Okay, famous brother-sister ‘duos.’ Donnie and Marie-”

“Oh, they were so doing it,” Dee conceded.

“The Carpenters. Those tennis chicks, I swear to god, that one is a dude, I’ve been saying that for years.”

“They are n-”

“Every one of those Brady bunch kids were banging, you know that, right?”

“Ew, yeah.”

“Those kids in Flowers in the Attic.”

“That was a book, Charlie.”

“What’s the difference? Oh! Oh! The Arquettes. There’s no other way to explain it.”

“Okay, I’ll give you that one.”

Charlie looked up at Dee with a huge grin, his hands out and open. “See? See? Come on, we can do this!”


******


Mac was rubbing Dennis’ shoulders while giving him a pep talk.

“You know you’re going to have to get shit-faced to go through with it, right?”

“Hey, that’s my sister you’re talking about!”

“She’s not the easiest on the eyes, bro, you know it. I mean, we‘re talking about The Aluminum Monster, naked.”

Dennis gave a small nod, his face queasy.

“So here’s the plan. I serve up the booze until you’re almost blind, we get Dee to wear this,” he held out a paper bag, “and Frank records it all for posterity.”

Frank, his back turned to them, gave a curt wave as he continued rigging up the tripod for the camera. The over-head lights were already in position behind the bar.

“Boom! Pay day,” Mac punched his open palm hard. “Okay, buddy? We got it all covered, what could go wrong?”

Dennis nodded, a small smile on his face.


*****


“Charlie, cut it out. I’m not doing this!”

“Dammit, Dee, come on! Can’t you think about someone other than yourself?”

Charlie stood impatiently in front of the door until Dee held it open for him. He breezed past her and slapped his hands flat onto the counter.

The Waitress rolled her eyes and sighed. “You just came in here.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Charlie flailed his hands in the air. “Is there some kind of rule about me buying more than one cup of coffee?”

The Waitress pointed to a piece of paper taped up to the door that read:

Charlie Kelly is only allowed
One coffee per hour on my shifts.
And he has to drink them outside.

~W


“What is that? What the shit is that!? Okay, you wanna play like that? FINE!”

Dee paid for her coffee, took a sip and followed Charlie to the door. “I’m not having sex with Dennis, I don’t care how much you offer me.”

“Wait, who’s having sex with Dennis?” The Waitress had Dee’s elbow in her hand and a mixture of panic and excitement in her eyes.

Dee looked the Waitress up and down.

Charlie looked between the two for a minute then shouted, “Oh, no! No way! NO WAY!”

Dee’s face broke into a mischievous grin. “Oh, I think way.” She smiled down at the girl and put on a sweet expression. “How would you like to have sex with my broth-”

“Okay!!”

“-er? Alright then! Be at the bar tonight by 10. And don’t dress so slutty.”

The Waitress looked down at her cardigan layered over a tee shirt.

“Dee, this is NOT happening!”

“Oh, it’s happening.” She turned towards the bar and crossed the street, all the pent up frustration of being the lesser twin fueling her determination.


****


“Come on, Dennis, you’ve only had fourteen beers, you gotta have at least twenty in you before you attempt this.”

The bar was mostly empty with the exception of two homeless guys shredding some of Frank’s documents in a dark corner. Mac had set up a bed with candles burning on stands around it, and Frank had the camera mounted on the bar.

“I think I’m gonna need a few more, too,” Frank pulled a bottle of bourbon from behind the counter and drank straight from the neck.

“Frank, they’re not your kids anymore, what do you care? Dennis, I need you to focus,” Mac grabbed Dennis by the shoulders and held him up. It took a second for Dennis’ eyes to lock onto Mac’s.

“Dennis, now I’ve put some costumes back in the office for you two to wear. Why don’t you go back there and put yours on, Dee should be here any minute, and then it’s Go Time.” He sang a bass guitar lick while thrusting his pelvis in the air. “Dude, this is going to be so hot.”

“I don’t know about that…”

“Frank? I don’t need you editorializing. Dennis? Here, take this,” he shoved a water glass filled with vodka in Dennis’ slack hand. “Drink up buddy, you’re about to become rich.”

Dennis staggered into the back office. Charlie and Dee came in arguing.

“I can’t believe you’re going to-”

“If you don’t shut it, Charlie, I’m not going to give you a cut!”

“Oh, I’m getting a cut!”

“For what? I’m the one that has to have sex with Dennis! It’s my money!”

“I’m getting a cut of something, god dammit!”

“Ho, ho, you two,” Mac had his hands out to defuse the fighting, “I’m trying to set a mood here. Charlie? Get the lights. Dee? I’m going to need you to put on a little number I picked up for you down at the prison-”

“Oooh, good call, Mac. Prison pornos are hooooot,” he finished in a high, sing-songy voice.

“Thank you, Charlie. Dee, go put on your little outfit and don’t forget the, you know, “ he waved his hand in a circle around his head, “the bag.”

Dee rolled her eyes. “Okay, sure. Yeah, I won’t forget that. I’m just going to go outside for a bit, catch some fresh air, you know, find my center.” Dee closed her eyes, pulling her clenched fist in the air down to her waist. “I’ll go in from the back.”

“Yeah, he will.” Charlie laughed and grabbed Mac’s beer from him, downing it. “Where’s Dennis?”

Mac fiddled with the gels taped over the lights. “He’s in the back, dude. He’s getting into his outfit.”

Charlie snapped to attention. “He, uh, might need some help with that. I’ll just, you know, check it out. I’ll just go back there and see if someone doesn’t need a little of the Charlie Magic.” He waggled his fingers in the air.

“Whatever, dude.”

Frank waited until the door closed and pointed at Mac, “I told you, we gotta drug that one and dump him by the river.”

“He’s your kid, Frank, you do it.”


*****


“Okay, you go in there, put on the outfit hanging up, put this, “ she handed the bag to the Waitress, “over your face, they’ll think it’s me, and then you get to do my brother!” Big satisfied smile.

“This is really weird.”

Dee cocked an eyebrow at her and took a swig from her bottle.

“He’s really in there waiting to have sex with you? Me? You?”

Dee nodded.

“Give me the bag.”


*****


“Dee, did you get shorter?”

Fortunately, the bag muffled the Waitress’ voice. “Uh huh. I mean, I took off my heels.”

“Whatever, just… get on the bed and… try to look sexy for once.”

She tried to hop to the bed as gracefully as she could, but the leg shackles were making it hard.

“You know what? Just lay face down on the edge of the bed there.”

“Oh, good idea,” Frank said. “Those prison uniforms have back doors, anyway. Saves the laundry guys time from all the mending.”


*****


Dennis leaned against the wall, trying to stay upright. He couldn’t bring his leg up high enough to pull off his shoes without falling. He couldn’t keep his eyes opened long enough to find his leg, either.

Charlie held him up, led him out of the storage room and into the office to lay down on the small sofa.

“Shhh. It’s okay, dude. You don’t have to do Dee.”

“But… ten thousand… twenty large, Charlie. I gotta. Bang Sweet Dee like a screen door. I gotta take one for the team.”

“You’ve done enough, buddy. You‘ve done enough.”

Charlie laid his hand on Dennis’ head. He really did have amazing hair. Charlie made a mental note to hoark whatever product Dennis kept in his apartment.

“I’m taking this one.” He stood and unbuttoned his jeans and reached for the prison guard uniform and paper bag.


*****


“Why are they both wearing bags?”

“Frank…” Mac sighed. “He wears one in case hers breaks, don’t you know anything?”

“Oh, right. Okay, people, let’s saddle up and get this show on the road!” Frank pushed a button on the tape deck behind the camera and Bryan Adams’ “Have You Really Ever Loved A Woman?” filled the room.

Mac’s jaw dropped. “What the- Frank, come on! This is a hot prison porno, you can’t have romantic music playing! It’s gotta be something like Anthrax or Dre! Some god damned ball-draining rock-n-frickin'-roll!”

“I’m the one calling the shots here, and this is the song that my not-son is going to bang my not-daughter to, alright?”

“Why do you get to be in charge, it was my idea!”

Frank leaned away from the camera. “Are we gonna sit here and argue, or are we gonna make some magic?”

Charlie shouted from under his paper bag, “MAGIC. Let’s make magic, I wanna make some magic!”

Mac grinned, “Dennis, I always knew you wanted to do her, man that is sick. You are so going to hell, bro” He clapped his hands together once. “Lights?”

“Camera!” Charlie shouted.

“Dennis, you’re really revving’ to go, man! Aaaaaaaaaand, ACTION!”

“Charlie?” The Waitress whispered.

“Nope! Not Charlie, let’s do this!”


******


Sweet Dee downed her ninth beer and smashed the bottle in the middle of the alleyway. “They juss… they don’ unnerstand, is all. Who does…” She almost lost her footing but caught the door handle just in time. “I can’t,” she made a circle with one hand and poked her index finger in and out of it, “ Dennis. I juss… nope. “

She made her way into the back office and slumped onto the sofa. Dennis moaned and shifted; she had plopped onto his legs.

“We gotta do it, Dee. We gotta. Twenty thou man. No, twenny thousman… Men? What is it?”

“Dennis, no!”

“But Dee,” Dennis struggled to sit up, “this time we’re getting paid for it!”

“Shh!! You promised we’d never talk about that!”



*****


Mac was strutting around the bar, whistling “We’re In The Money” the next day. Charlie came in humming Bryan Adams.

“No way, dude, the three times Dennis asked that to be played last night was enough. What was with that guy, anyway?”

“What… what do you mean?”

“I think he really does love Dee. Biblically. That was some tender fucking shit. Well, until he started spanking her ass with that serving tray. I never thought Dee had a such a round ass. She always looks like an old lady that spent her days sitting, you know what I mean? Pancake butt, right?”

“No! No! That wasn’t a round ass, that was a nasty, skinny ass. That was a Dee Ass.”

“I don’t care, dude, I’d bang that ass, that’s all I’m saying. I’d need the bag, though.”

“Oh, of course,” Charlie agreed.

Dee came in wearing thick sunglasses. Dennis was right behind her already popping some aspirin and wincing from the sunlight outside. The guys whistled lasciviously. “Hey, hey, if it isn’t the dirty rotten sister fucker! What‘s up, bitches?”

Dee fixed them with her most disgusted glare. “Shut up. You two watched. It was your idea.”

Dennis slumped into a booth holding his head in both hands. “I really did it?”

“You sure did, dude, you went to town on her!”

“Mac don’t be disgusting.” Dee left to get a clean apron from the back.

“It was totally hot. I mean, disgusting, because you know… But man, you are one sick dude!”

Dennis looked up at Mac wearily. “So where’s my money?”

Mac looked at Charlie, confused. “What money?”

“My money! My twenty thousand dollars?”

Mac laughed. “Dude. Where the hell would I get twenty thousand dollars? I never had any money.”

Frank came in looking pissed. “You’re never going to believe this. I took the video we shot last night to this guy I know;”

Dennis interrupted, “You took the video? Wait. What guy?”

“I gotta guy, that’s all you need to know. So anyway, I told him I had this hot video of a dude banging his sister and he tells me that he can’t use it because you covered up your faces.”

Dennis spit out the water he had been trying to swallow. “What?”

Charlie quickly followed suit to keep up appearances. “What do you mean? He said it was hot, though, right? I mean, the quality wasn’t in question was it? The guy, uh, Dennis had skills, right?”

“He didn’t even look, Nimrod. He said he’s got his hands full of videos coming to him every day from those dudes you know.”

“What dudes?” Mac asked.

“These dudes.” Frank pulled a DVD case out of his coat pocket and dropped it on the counter. On the cover were three very naked bodies, three bodies that desperately needed to be covered up. Pale, pasty, covered in a slick sheen of sweat and what looked like it could possibly be milk, two brothers with mono brows, tighty whities, and 70s style bathrobes were licking the feet of a thin, pasty, sweaty young woman with a matching mono brow and what appeared to be a Tweety Bird shirt rucked up around her rib cage.

The cover read simply, “The Sweet Smell of McPoyle: Part 18.”

Dee had entered the room while they looked over the picture. She peered over Dennis’ shoulders and dry heaved a few times. “That’s it, I’m out of here. Later, boners.”

Mac sat back and ran his hands through his hair. “You think they’ve done any prison-style ones?”

Comments

( 54 comments — Leave a comment )
brunettepet
Jan. 28th, 2009 04:20 pm (UTC)
Well, now I'm going to have to go on Hulu and watch a couple episodes. I'll be back later when I have a handle on the reprehensible characters! Yay fic!
stoney321
Jan. 28th, 2009 04:28 pm (UTC)
They're all gold, but two in particular crack me up the most:

S1: The Gang Goes To An Abortion Clinic
and
S3: The Gang Gets a Dumpster Baby

Oooh! And S1 "Charlie Gets Molested." That has the McPoyles, the best, most awful TV characters ever created.

:D
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susnasty
Jan. 28th, 2009 05:27 pm (UTC)
Oh my GOD
I honestly don't think I've ever laughed to hard.
you got everything down SO perfectly--i could hear everyone speaking in my head. Especially Charlie and Dee.

And the McPoyles at the and was a perfect touch.

And Yay for Charlie for finally bangin' the waitress!

I think i now have to spend my snow day with the gang!! (I think the episode that cracked me up the most was Nightman Cometh... especially the end.)
stoney321
Jan. 28th, 2009 05:37 pm (UTC)
YAY!!!!!!

Oh, I'm so glad to hear something back. I love that show so much. It's so awful which makes it wonderful. The McPoyles are my most favorite TV characters ever invented. EVER. <3

Thank you!!
beyondrubicon
Jan. 28th, 2009 06:29 pm (UTC)
My brother sat me down and made me watch the entire series last fall and I haven't been able to get "Day Man" out of my head since.

This was PERFECT. I loved that the Waitress signed her note "W". And Frank's prison uniforms.

I'm actually a little surprised the show hasn't done this as an episode yet. This is really only a small step up (down?) from being crack heads on welfare. :)

*shudders at McPoyle porn*
stoney321
Jan. 28th, 2009 06:32 pm (UTC)
Hahaha, I totally want this to be an episode!! God, I love that show. They're all so horrible. "He was turtle heading! TURTLE HEADING!"

I'm so glad you thought this worked, thank you!
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beer_good_foamy
Jan. 28th, 2009 06:43 pm (UTC)
Oh! Oh! The Arquettes. There’s no other way to explain it.

Frank, they’re not your kids anymore, what do you care?

The Sweet Smell of McPoyle: Part 18.

~W

And Charlie/Waitress, and Frank the porn producer, and Mac going on about how ugly Dee is, and... I LOVE YOU FOR THIS. And I love the fact that Always Sunny is so messed up that it's possible to write something like this and have it feel like a perfectly natural plot.
stoney321
Jan. 28th, 2009 06:46 pm (UTC)
*claps hands and buys you many things that sparkle*

Oh, yay! ANd hahaha, that's totally true: you can write the most cracked out thing ever and it would feel natural. Which is why I love it (and why I'm shocked there's not more fic!)

I need there to be a McPoyle ficathon, I really do. Thank you so much for reading this, yay!
minstrel666
Jan. 28th, 2009 08:40 pm (UTC)
I am so happy I will have fast Internet next week and can check this thing out. :)

Also - yay, a U-Boot!
stoney321
Jan. 28th, 2009 08:49 pm (UTC)
The show is totally worth it.
susnasty
Jan. 28th, 2009 11:08 pm (UTC)
And I honestly don't know why there are so few fans.
But if you look here in Philly, you'll find a shitload--everyone loves the show.
A lot of times we'll go and watch them shooting if they're doing exterior scenes
stoney321
Jan. 29th, 2009 12:21 am (UTC)
I don't know why, either. Maybe because it's a cable show? It makes no sense to me, either, the show is so great!
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santabutt
Jan. 29th, 2009 03:55 am (UTC)
This was so brilliant. BRILLIANT. I wish I had a happy Charlie icon but I don't :(
(Anonymous)
Jan. 29th, 2009 04:06 am (UTC)
oh but charlie is rarely happy.
he's the most hilariously pathetic character ever.
(there's just something about the mix of alcohol and glue and catfood that makes you so sick you HAVE to go to sleep)
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bioniccheese
Jan. 29th, 2009 04:06 am (UTC)
This. Was. Amazing. That sounded like it could be an actual episode!

Jesus, Sunny needs a lot more fic as far as I'm concerned.

Also, Charlie finally banged the Waitress! Woo!
stoney321
Jan. 29th, 2009 01:02 pm (UTC)
OMG, WHYYYYYYYY is there no fic out there? Talk about a show ripe for fanfic...

Thank you so much! I've never written this show before, so I'm so glad you thought it sounded true, YAY.
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denelian
Jan. 29th, 2009 04:07 am (UTC)
erm. except for heros and BSG and Sarah Conner, i DO NOT watch TV. and i DVR those and watch them in huge chunks. so this is why i do not watch this show.

but... i think maybe i will start. this was HILARIOUS. falling down laughing funny. doesn't hurt that there's 3 inches of ice on everything outside and so i can SEE these people trying to do all this on the ice...

but i'm weird :D

anyway, the point is, this was WONDERFUL!!! thank you for writing and posting it. and now i totally understand what you needed porn titles for and why anime porn would not work lol
stoney321
Jan. 29th, 2009 01:02 pm (UTC)
The show is hilarious, everyone should be watching! Thanks for reading it, even though you don't know what the hell was going on, hahaha. :D
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chrryblssmninja
Jan. 29th, 2009 09:01 am (UTC)
fantastic stuff. The inclusion of the McPoyles at the end actually made my jaw drop.


Although I think Charlie's last name is "Kelly" in the show.


Today in class, we had to say what we did over winter break. The last thing I said was "watch seasons 1-4 of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." like 3/4 of the class (okay, it was a small discussion section) erupted in appreciation, and one girl said, "That's what I did too!"

ah.
stoney321
Jan. 29th, 2009 01:04 pm (UTC)
Oh, derp. I used his real name, whoops! I sat down and wrote this straight into an LJ window, so I didn't have a beta go through. Will fix!

It's such a great show, I wish it had a bigger fandom!
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kseenaa
Jan. 29th, 2009 10:31 am (UTC)
Never heard about this series (poor Swede...), but that seems seriously cracktastic! :-D Had to read up on Wikipedia before I started reading this fic. :-) It was awesome! Highly entertainging! X-D
stoney321
Jan. 29th, 2009 01:05 pm (UTC)
It's such a funny show. Like an angry, pathetic Seinfeld. Thank you for reading it, even though you didn't know the show, that's so cool!
allthespoons
Jan. 31st, 2009 08:18 pm (UTC)
This is AWESOME.
stoney321
Jan. 31st, 2009 11:50 pm (UTC)
No, YOU ARE. (Thanks!)
vilify
Feb. 13th, 2009 02:43 am (UTC)
XD I stumbled across this, and it's the best Sunny fic I've found. Brilliant! I love how you have it set up!
stoney321
Feb. 13th, 2009 01:28 pm (UTC)
Oh, thank you! It's the first Sunny fic I've written due to a lack of finding any online. Thanks so much for reading!
embee123
Oct. 25th, 2009 08:17 pm (UTC)
“Why are they both wearing bags?”

“Frank…” Mac sighed. “He wears one in case hers breaks, don’t you know anything?”


LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL. That's hilarious and EXACTLY the type of joke they'd include in the show. I could hear and envision all of the characters perfectly while reading this. Great job!

P.S. I'm in a little in love with your icon. Mind if I yoink it?
stoney321
Oct. 25th, 2009 09:48 pm (UTC)
I'm so happy to hear you liked it, thank you! Man, I freaking love that show.

I didn't make the icon, so have at it. The credit info should be on my userpics page.
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lost_raziel
Dec. 14th, 2009 03:06 pm (UTC)
Almost a year late but this is amazing! The lack of Sunny fic is so annoying. I wish there was a crap load of Dennis/Dee fics out there, I just love them so much.
stoney321
Dec. 14th, 2009 04:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! (And pfft, I'll take a late reader any day.)

I wish there was more, too. I think that people shy away from writing dark sitcom-based fanfiction in general, which makes me sad.
twoskeletons
Dec. 28th, 2009 09:52 pm (UTC)
This. Is. AMAZING. omg, dude, looooong have I longed for good It's Always Sunny fic and OMG HERE IT IS. WITH BONUS TWINCEST. jfkldsjflds \o/ you have made my daaaaay

My favorite parts:
Frank adjusted his glasses, his gaze fixed on his former children. “Who’s your agent?”
THE RULES ABOUT CHARLIE'S COFFEE-BUYING
with the exception of two homeless guys shredding some of Frank’s documents in a dark corner.
“I told you, we gotta drug that one and dump him by the river.”
I gotta. Bang Sweet Dee like a screen door. I gotta take one for the team.”
“MAGIC. Let’s make magic, I wanna make some magic!”
“Shh!! You promised we’d never talk about that!”
THE SWEET SMELL OF MCPOYLE: PART 18
stoney321
Dec. 29th, 2009 04:03 pm (UTC)
WHY IS THERE SUCH A LACK OF FIC?! Waaah.

I am so happy to have made you happy, woot! Fanks ever so!
nattybear
Mar. 16th, 2010 08:02 am (UTC)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

Oh man, I loved this. The dialogue is all so spot on, so in character. Mac and Frank were the best, I think. This:

“Frank…” Mac sighed. “He wears one in case hers breaks, don’t you know anything?”

... so captures the non sequitur kind of logic they have on the show. And the fast paced, chaotic timing:

Charlie shouted from under his paper bag, “MAGIC. Let’s make magic, I wanna make some magic!”

And finally: The cover read simply, “The Sweet Smell of McPoyle: Part 18.”

*shudders* The mental image this provides is so disgustingly squick-worthy, but the fact that it's so canon is what makes it so hilarious.

I really enjoyed this, and congratulations for being one of the only writers brave enough to write fic for this show. I honestly think it's because as simple and crass the characters are, not many people they can capture them well enough to be able to write believable fic. You did though, and thanks so much for posting! *automatic fangirl* Loved it, I hope to see more from you. :D
stoney321
Mar. 19th, 2010 01:27 pm (UTC)
I come back from vacation to find this awesome comment? Thanks so much! And I agree with you about the lack of fic: I don't know if it's that people can't really delve into their level of baddirtywrongness or if it's that they're scared to try and write comedy, but whatever it is, it makes me sad in my pants. THat's why I went ahead and wrote mmy own story, I couldn't find but two others out there.

Anyway, thank you very much!
... - stoney321 - Mar. 19th, 2010 01:27 pm (UTC) - Expand
... - nattybear - Mar. 21st, 2010 02:08 am (UTC) - Expand
... - stoney321 - Mar. 21st, 2010 02:26 am (UTC) - Expand
... - nattybear - Mar. 23rd, 2010 06:41 pm (UTC) - Expand
( 54 comments — Leave a comment )

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Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

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