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Ants in my pants

I have complete wanderlust today, and no way to satisfy that need... Today is the kind of day where I want to change my name, have a completely new wardrobe, dark sunglasses, and hop on a plane to anywhere and just live in the moment for a month or so. *siiiiigh* Instead I'll do laundry, bah.

Things that made me laugh: The Geek Social Aptitude Test. I'm happy to say that I scored a 9 out of a possible 49 (men can score a 50.) But like the results say, I'm the James Dean of nerds, so, not totally cool. :)

I made bread yesterday and forgot to slip it in the oven to bake off, so it kept rising all night long. It's so tall I have to flip my toast over to toast the other half. Whoops! However, it's light as air. *pats belleh*

I would tool about town everywhere on this awesome bike. It's just awesome!

It's blustery outside, so no activities for me today. Probably what is inducing my labor antsy feelings. Talk to me! Tell me a story. I used to have a neighbor that was the best storyteller. So funny, this guy. He had a neighbor back in the day that was a real, honest to god hillbilly. He used to tell stories of a "squish squash" that terrorized the Georgia mountains. In a nutshell, it was the deep South version of Big Foot. How much more awesome is the name Squish Squash?? About a trillion times cooler.

*sigh* [eta] And don't forget to check out the trailer for my new movie St. Nick if you missed it earlier!

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( 38 comments — Leave a comment )
miss_sophia
Feb. 4th, 2009 03:26 pm (UTC)
Have you heard the one about the woman who knitted and felted Bella's uterus, complete with a little felted baby Renesmee, and then tied up the whole thing with a ribbon for extra WTFery? And the explanation of the color scheme is not to be missed either: "The inside of the belly is all black because Renesmee was such a mystery and was hiding. There is red for the Edward since he's a vampire and nothing shiny I had would felt. 8-P. Bits of brown in there for Jacob because he's part of Bella (even before imprinting) as much as her baby."

I don't know if that will make your day better or worse.
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 03:28 pm (UTC)
Oh yeah - that was linked yesterday. FREAKING CRAZINESS.
_tallian_
Feb. 4th, 2009 04:53 pm (UTC)
Someone has *way* too much time on her hands - the uterus creeps me out!
fabrisse
Feb. 4th, 2009 03:40 pm (UTC)
I hate riding a bike (I'm a walker), but I want that awesome bike.

I got a 12 on the aptitude test.

Squish Squash is the best bastardization of Sasquatch ever.
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 04:08 pm (UTC)
I don't like biking uphill - I still have a second knee needing surgery. But that bike? I think I could suffer through...

I can't express how much I love the name Squish Squash. It's so funny!
fiveandfour
Feb. 4th, 2009 03:40 pm (UTC)
Oh great, here I was settling in for another boring day of work - pretty well resigned to do a good job of it, too - and now all I want to do is hop on a plane. Doesn't even matter where it's going, either, so long as I'm traveling and meeting people and seeing someplace new.

So no story for you!

(Though I will say I thought of you last week-end when my daughter came across the Bunnies do Twilight in 30 seconds cartoon. We're of the mind that the Brokeback Mountain cartoon was better, but it made us laugh nevertheless.)
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 04:09 pm (UTC)
I haven't been to the Bunnies site in forever, thank you for that link! (My personal fave is Jaws.) "Die you sunofabitch!" Hahaha.

Oh man, you and me with the random plane hopping and not caring where I end up. [dreams]
_tallian_
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:00 pm (UTC)
I also am the James Dean of nerds. I obviously need to get some Linux tshirts to correct this problem.
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:45 pm (UTC)
I need some l33t sp34k shirts to increase my score, too!
ethrosdemon
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:04 pm (UTC)
I was being SO SUPERIOR to that geek test until I got here 38. I am a very active member of a private, invite-only BitTorrent tracker with extremely strict ratio/bitrate requirements. if I'm on more than one, that's probably multiple points, I guess.

I will tell you a story:

When I was a kid I lived in a town that was only accessible to the north by backroads, there was no interstate or highway, just two lane county roads. You had to know where you were going to get there if you came from anywhere but 1-10, and why anyone would be looking for my hometown anyway is unknown to me (maybe they would get really lost and need something to eat or they think the whole county is denuded of people so they would be enjoying the scenery and accidentally stumble on the town).

I grew up two blocks from the bay on a street that was still brick when I was a kid. We got milk and Coca Cola delivery. This was in a time after humanity had been to the moon, after the Oil Crisis, after cable television and greed was good. My road ended in a boat launch into the bay. This wasn't a rural location. It was in the oldest settled part of my town. The part of the bay by my home was called Texar and called a bayou. The main road that bisected my neighborhood was named Cervantes. My family had been in this town since people spoke the language that gifted my town with these names. This was before people spoke English there in a predominant way.

When I was young my grandfather would take me and the other kids to the end of our street to swim in the bay he had swum in as child. It was the same bay his father, his grandfather, his greatgrandfather and back back back back until people wore hats with feathers had swum in. I learned to swim in that bayou the same as everyone else who shared my nose of eyebrows or particular vocal inflection.

When I was very small a hurricane came and the bayou rose so high that our houses flooded. The wind was so strong that a magnolia tree that some person who lived very long ago and might have been the person I can thank for my curly hair or my dark eyes planted blew onto our roof. That night my family lit candles and bailed the water while laughing and telling stories of other storms.

When I was about ten, I was in a boat made of thin metal with my grandfather in this bayou and a log popped its head above water and eyed me. This log was called an alligator and my grandfather warned me it was bigger than our boat so not to agitate him. I looked at the gator-log and thought of all the times I'd swum right where it floated. I wasn't scared, just curious how many times I'd swum by him and never known he was there. I wondered how many alligators had lived next door to me and all my family for generation after generation and how we we kind of the same, this alligator and me: this was our home and where we belonged.

stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:52 pm (UTC)
Oooooh, I-10! Yes - if you don't know what's down a dirt road, you're not taking it, that's for sure. [plays banjo music in my head for the rest of your story]

Coca cola delivery? REALLY? That's the greatest thing I've ever heard! I love your story, btw. I am right there with you, eying that alligator. (But unlike you, I'm scared of it.)
ethrosdemon
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:59 pm (UTC)
Yeah, the coca cola was delivered in bottles in flats, the old 10oz bottles or the big liter bottles depending on which kind you got. Like milk bottles in a crate.

Alligators don't move fast, really. They kind of chill out most of the time.
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:14 pm (UTC)
My husband is from Houston and his neighbor's golden retriever was snatched by an alligator, so I have built in fear. YIKES.

You know what should be delivered? Desserts. There should be a service that delivers slices of cheesecake or brownie bottomed sundaes to your door. how 'bout it, science?
ethrosdemon
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:15 pm (UTC)
There's a cookie of the month club.
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:27 pm (UTC)
But you know how packaged, pre-made cookies aren't always good? I worry that I'd get something that's been sitting in a warehouse, shrink-wrapped.

Godiva and Vosges deliver, but it takes days. I want a delivery system like Dominoes, but for all the desserts I crave.

speaking of craving, I'm making some bruschetta with some home made bread right now. OM NOM NOM.
minstrel666
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:17 pm (UTC)
Whenever I'm in Spain visiting my Anna I have this urge to rip up the return ticket, apply for a SSN (or whatever they have their) and start a family with her. Whenever I tell her about that she's all "No, no, finish your college and LEARN SPANISH first". Like I wouldn't pick it up in a month. So right there with you on the spur of the moment.

As for horror stories (hey, you guys started off with Bella), did you know there is a real striga back in my old hometown? No, seriously - a couple of years ago (I was maybe 7 or so) our friend, mister Czarnecki, found one of his horses ridden half to death and with its mane tied into knots. Nobody believed him until it happened again next week and this time I was over and he showed me the horse. What he did was the old fashioned way of chasing strigas off: he hung a mirror in the stable. Basically, strigas are so scary, that even when they themselves see their own reflection, they run away.

It worked.

Now, some of you may be saying that this must've been a practical joke by some village clown or maybe mister Czarnecki himself. And you're probably right. But on the off chance you're wrong, a small mirror doesn't seem that expensive.

Other things to watch out for in my neighbourhood: do not sleep on the side of the field at noon, do not touch stones which have hoove marks on them, do visit the rock circle on the days of solstice.
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:47 pm (UTC)
I highly recommend you follow through on your instinct. Then blog about it so I can live vicariously through you.

I love this story! It needs to be an X-Files episode STAT. i need to make a post with all the old legends I've heard over the years...
minstrel666
Feb. 4th, 2009 06:08 pm (UTC)
Polish monster stories don't go down well on film - just ask the creators of The Witcher movie. Or watch the film if you want to see a sad attempt at fantasy cinema with actors that are usually way better.

I can already see the name of the blog: Pole-Mica, or how I try to make sense of this country, with regular features from Anna, entitled: Mi novio Poloco.

Yeah, I really need to leave the title to her.
brunettepet
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:41 pm (UTC)
Friends just came back from Venice yesterday and I am all, "Why am I not in Venice eating frutte del mare and drinking vino right this minute?!?!" *dons oversized 60's sunglasses and a head scarf and takes off for the airport*

Damn, my passport's expired. Maybe I'll go for a bike ride.
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:48 pm (UTC)
YES YES, dressing the part is a must! And a convertible Aston Martin or Alfa Romeo is key to this plan.

If you ride the bike I linked above, I'm hitching a ride.
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:49 pm (UTC)
HEEEEEEE. I love that the greatest novels are Graphic ones. Bwah.

I would be happiest making the Kestle run in .12 parsecs, myself. But alas, this bucket of bolts won't make it to hyperdrive...
minstrel666
Feb. 4th, 2009 06:24 pm (UTC)
Well, maybe if we put in a bigger engine (a Wankel one! Every car needs this miracle of engineering!) and change the gear ratios and started from atop a hill...

Dang it, now I want to calculate how much more horsepower would an EB110 need to achieve lightspeed.

Sigh, cruising the galaxy in an Italian collectible... this is what I should be doing instead of research.
absinthe_gypsy
Feb. 4th, 2009 06:34 pm (UTC)
I always have this despirate need to go get on a plane to anywhere. I take comfort in the fact that at the end of this month I'll be visiting my parents in Colorado. It's somewhere I've already seen, a lot, but it's better than nothing you know?
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:16 pm (UTC)
I have that same wish - just show up at the airport, buy one to anywhere and just see where life takes you.

Colorado will be a lot of fun, though!
absinthe_gypsy
Feb. 5th, 2009 12:55 am (UTC)
it will! and I'm going to get to see people I havn't seen in years!
mosrael
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:13 pm (UTC)
imadeyouabeard.blogspot.com

I saw this site and thought of you. ^__^ Not to mention, the comic wondermark.com is excellent and has a 'famous beards' poster in its shop.

As for stories... just now I heard someone out front of my apartment building, singing as they rummage through the dumpster. I was confused for a moment because when I hear singing outside, it's usually night, and the singing is loud and clear. I always go to check, and a young man with a guitar on his back will be walking down the street, maybe heading into town, but most likely returning. I don't know anything else about him, but it always makes me grin. It's such a pleasant addition to this semi-chaotic downtown neighborhood. :D
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:17 pm (UTC)
Hahaha, someone linked me to that beard site a week or so ago, it's awesome!

Oh, that's wonderful to have those familiar neighbors, even if you aren't on named terms. I love seeing the same people walking their dogs or pushing a stroller down my street, too.
kseenaa
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:15 pm (UTC)
Now that is one awesome bike! :-D I would love to have one to!

Also, creepy kids R creepy. I don't know what it is with that trailer, but I get the feeling it ain't ending in a good way for those kids. :-P
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:18 pm (UTC)
Isn't that bike wonderful? I can see a plastic sheet that snaps on to the top and the foot rail for bad weather. (It does need fenders, though, so the street muck doesn't splash up on your pants.)

The kids are sad, not evil or anything.
kseenaa
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:31 pm (UTC)
Oh, I didn't say they were evil or anything. Just creepy. And sad to, thats true. I just get a bad feeling for them, so to speak. They they'll end up dead or something in the end of the movie. :-P
shadowvalkyrie
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:36 pm (UTC)
I only scored 6... I doubt I'm really a geek. *sadface*
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 07:42 pm (UTC)
Cl347ly y0u n33d t0 w07k 0n y0u7 n37d3ing! :D
shadowvalkyrie
Feb. 4th, 2009 08:07 pm (UTC)
This took me waaaay too long to figure out. Embarrassing. Maybe it would help my geek cred to not shower for a week and neglect my dental hygiene?
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Feb. 4th, 2009 10:46 pm (UTC)
Anne, I was SURE you'd beat my score! [to my shame, of course]

Oooh, do you watch Chuck? They had a scene in his bedroom and one of his posters was an original Dune theater poster and I thought of you and also how awesome that is. :D
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Feb. 5th, 2009 12:40 am (UTC)
It's a DELIGHT for nerds, that show. Background, Chuck accidentally had government secrets "installed" in his brain, and now he works with spies since all the information is in his mind. (The 'intersect' as it's called was destroyed. Work with me here. *G*)

He works at Best Buy, except it's Buy More and he's the leader of the Nerd Herd. HEE. There was an episode where one person had to win an old Galaga-style video game to save the world, and the game was programmed to a Rush song.

It's a little schmaltzy in places, but I love it. And the kids watch it with me, so there's that, too. Adam Baldwin is in it!
( 38 comments — Leave a comment )

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Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

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