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I have lost my damn mind.

So here's what I did today. May I remind you that I am a grown-ass woman. I bought: silver lamè red, cobalt blue, and purple satin, and a Pucci-like print. Not to mention a string of faux pearls, faux fur, and a variety of large "jewels" that are sticky on the back. And pieces of leather, and other fabrics.

Why? To make a wardrobe for toy horses, of course. I MEAN, NATURALLY, RIGHT? [turbans, dressing gowns, smoking jackets, naughty lingerie, peasant vests. FOR HORSE TOYS.] Omg, I should not be this excited. I looked around for a toy pageboy cap (because Skidoodle is Oirish, don' cha ken?) but realized I'm going to have to make one. And while I searched I realized that there is actually a world of women out there that do this stuff UNIRONICALLY. Like, they just enjoy dressing up their toys and COMPETING. Competing.

Not young girls, GROWN WOMEN. I promise I will not turn into that. I promise.

But look at this cad! This bastard! This wealthy playboy that gets what he wants, when he wants it, and right now he wants to force Fancy Face Von Linestock to marry him and give him babies!



LOOK AT THAT SMUG BASTARD! He sounds like Jeremy Irons in my head, by the way.

Oh, Ransom, how many fillies hearts will you break before your lust is ever sated?

Comments

( 48 comments — Leave a comment )
elizardbits
Apr. 20th, 2011 09:57 pm (UTC)
*dies*

He needs some kind of obnoxious facial hair, I think.
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:08 pm (UTC)
I was thinking of fashioning a monocle. ALSO HE WILL HAVE A PURPLE "SILK" SMOKING JACKET. AND ASCOT.
brunettepet
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:11 pm (UTC)
I am laughing so hard right now. He is just missing a top hat and a sneer!

This is going to be EPIC!
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:19 pm (UTC)
I was thinking of making him some dressy spats for his back feet. :D

TOP HAT. Yes, he needs that!!
brunettepet
Apr. 20th, 2011 11:00 pm (UTC)
Spats! I love it!
jaysons_lady
May. 7th, 2012 05:00 am (UTC)
Voting for the spats!
a2zmom
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:20 pm (UTC)
You can tell that cad is up to NO GOOD.
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:22 pm (UTC)
He is such a hedonist! It's all about him. The poor women who can't help but love him.
wesleysgirl
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:24 pm (UTC)
Ha ha ha OMG!!! Breyer horses! Are you going to start breaking their legs off and then plastering them back on in different positions? (And, the important question - is it possible to break the leg off one horse and plaster it onto the crotch of a different horse? IT COULD BE A PORNO HORSE, Stoney!!!!)
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:29 pm (UTC)
Oh, no no no! I could never damage them! They're not going to move, trust me, the tentative shots I've taken of them is HILARIOUS.

PORNO HORSE! Hahahaha. Oh, I'm making sexy lingerie for a reason, believe me! SATIN SHEETS, TOO. Lol!
herald_mari
Apr. 21st, 2011 05:47 am (UTC)
This is totally possible, though I have never done it. Certainly possible though with a little hot water and epoxy. (I have attempted a slight remake of the FAS (Family Arabian Stallion) mold into a more dressage-y trot...)

This was probably a rhetorical question. /facepalm *smiles*
altyronsmaker
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:45 pm (UTC)
Umm. there seriously are times when you scare me. o.0 *teasing, natch*

I know, most times when I click your cut tags, I shall be pleasantly amused. this is, again, one of those times. Damn. You too funny, stoney!
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:49 pm (UTC)
I feel sad for people that can't get my humor, I really really do. Because you KNOW it is fun up in here. :D
strtmyorange
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:46 pm (UTC)
Like I said on the tweetering site place:

There's just so much AWESOME that I have no words!!!
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:53 pm (UTC)
Oh hey, that's you!

I JUST MADE A PAGEBOY CAP. FOR A HORSE. A horse TOY, omg.
strtmyorange
Apr. 21st, 2011 12:23 am (UTC)
Ahahahahahahahaaaaa!! YES!!!

I believe that Ransom needs a bucket or trough filled with a martini.

And a pipe.
drvsilla
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:49 pm (UTC)
He's got it all.

EXCEPT A HEART.
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:54 pm (UTC)
YES. Yes, oh god, yes. Why does he make the ladies want him so? THE BASTARD.
ethrosdemon
Apr. 20th, 2011 10:53 pm (UTC)
YOU ARE THE CRAZIEST PERSON I KNEW KNOW (BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT DEAD) TODAY.

Edited at 2011-04-20 10:53 pm (UTC)
stoney321
Apr. 20th, 2011 11:15 pm (UTC)
GD LJ is being a dick today. Fourth time replying is the charm?

I am making a fur capelet with a pearl clasp to hold it on. ON THE HORSE.
dampersnspoons
Apr. 20th, 2011 11:16 pm (UTC)
AHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAH

*DEEP BREATH*

HAHAAHAHAHAHAHA! I wish I could try something from that horse's brandy collection one day.
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:52 pm (UTC)
BETH YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW CRAZY I AM BECOMING OH MY GOD.

I need to sculpy a little pipe for him. And a monocle. And make glasses for the "ugly horse" so she can take them off and suddenly be BEAUTIFUL. *falls over, foaming at the mouth*
chantal87
Apr. 21st, 2011 12:15 am (UTC)
FABULOUS!!!!
Just fabulous :-)
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:51 pm (UTC)
THE PEARL-EDGED CAPELET, M. THE PEARL-EDSGED CAPELET! Top O'The Line will do her best Jackie Collins, just you see.
prophecygirrl
Apr. 21st, 2011 12:16 am (UTC)
Oh HELLS yeah!

Work it, Ransom!

OWN IT!!!!!!





stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:49 pm (UTC)
He not only owns it, he INVENTED IT.

Wheeheeeheeepbbbllllllt!
captainofidiots
Apr. 21st, 2011 12:30 am (UTC)
This just makes me so happy. He's such a dapper fellow. The bastard.
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:49 pm (UTC)
WATCH OUT, THOUGH! He's a heart breaker, love taker, dream maker, don't you mess around with he!
(Deleted comment)
lynnenne
Apr. 21st, 2011 03:27 am (UTC)
ME TOO!
herald_mari
Apr. 21st, 2011 05:45 am (UTC)
(try this again with a gleeful icon)
x2 GLEE!
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:48 pm (UTC)
SUE I WILL TEXT YOU A PICTURE OF THE WEDDING DRESS.
(Deleted comment)
txvoodoo
Apr. 21st, 2011 02:24 am (UTC)
I think I missed the genesis of this horse fetish hobby!

Backstory?
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:48 pm (UTC)
Where the hell have you been???? :D

For two months I've been blogging about finally turning this story (wrote it back in 2006-2007) into a series of shorts, and how part of my epic road trip involved me picking up these toys from the BFFs folks.

WHEE!
(Deleted comment)
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:46 pm (UTC)
YES YOU DO. I will make sure that the fandom wiki entry is listed thusly: SAM CREATED THE FIRST STALLIONCREST MASTERPIECE THAT HAS YET TO BE TOPPED.
lynnenne
Apr. 21st, 2011 03:26 am (UTC)
I AM BEAMING WITH JOY OVER THIS. BEAMING!
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:45 pm (UTC)
ME, TOO. LYNNE. THE PAGEBOY CAP. OH MY GOD, I HAVE BEEN LOL'ING FOR 24 HOURS NOW!
serenemiss
Apr. 21st, 2011 05:01 am (UTC)
So random yet so hilarious; love it! XD
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:45 pm (UTC)
Well.... random if you've not seen that I've been posting about filming a series of shorts with these toys for the past two months, based on a story I wrote back in 2006. ;)
herald_mari
Apr. 21st, 2011 05:44 am (UTC)
Is that the Stud Spider mold? (I could go get my horsies from the living room to check), or is it a Man o' War painted black?

Randsom is a handsome horsie-boy! *grins*

PS - Thank you. I needed plastic horse pics tonight to make me smile. :)
stoney321
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:44 pm (UTC)
It's the Trakehner, according to my friend. (they're hers, not mine. I am woefully uneducated in the world of models!)

And that foal in your icon is making me want to boop its nose! <3
oatmellow
Apr. 21st, 2011 01:49 pm (UTC)
I just love it when you lose your mind.

And I thought I was weird for getting excited when I found SOCK MONKEY NESTING EGGS (omg the awesome!) But wow. You're infecting me with your happiness over horsey costuming and pr0n!!
kseenaa
Apr. 21st, 2011 10:20 pm (UTC)
X-D I hope you'll show this to the masses when your done (aka us), because I can't wait to see it! X-D
marenfic
Apr. 22nd, 2011 12:36 am (UTC)
Heh. I love your life.

ipnotika
Apr. 22nd, 2011 01:00 am (UTC)
You are the awesome-est. Fer serious. I used to make clothes for my Breyer horse collection when I was a kid. Usually it involved cutting holes in an old baby sock to make front leg and neck holes, but still. I done dressed 'em, I did. Can not WAIT to see the rest of the herd, and the inevitable movie delight!!!
fiveandfour
Apr. 23rd, 2011 04:46 am (UTC)
Others may call you strange, Stoney, but I say neigh: you'll always be full of whinny to me!

(Can't wait for this movie!)
(Deleted comment)
( 48 comments — Leave a comment )

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Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

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