MNfo(s - i) = S/C
M = Mocking
N = Nazism
f,o = fallacy multiplied by obfuscation
s, i = halfwit minus intellect
S = snuff film (in ratio with)
C = cancer
Now. you can solve for cancer types, or the quantitative sum of Nazis in a given thread by- No. No you can't. But I am STILL laughing over mocking causes cancer. And is equal to snuff films. And I made icons!!
1.



Different version...
4.



I overheard
And seriously. There is no way in hell my ass can endure this chair long enough to reply to everyone that is STILL replying to that post. I'm a big believer in replying to every comment left in my LJ, but sometimes... Oh gimmie a break. So if you have posted and not heard from me, that's because I'm doing something ELSE. Away from there. Hats off to
For the three who are still interested, I'll sum up my fantastic weekend with my best friend, who I don't get to see often enough. She's beautiful, funny, silly, and we laughed a lot. We mocked a lot. I immediately checked her into MD Anderson as a tumor grew on her face from the mocking. I kid! It was on her back. I am INCREDIBLY sore, as she is the Most Fit Human on Earth and pushes me to be in constant motion. TO HER CREDIT: she rubbed my knees and calves and I feel a thousand times better.
Until Saturday. I mean, she runs 8-10 miles every day for MAINTENANCE. In addition to working on a horse farm. And riding her bike every where. FIT. But she drinks Diet Coke, so I mocked her for that. And she punched me. I don't know why I'm still friends with her...
We met in college, both of us incredibly lonely and out of place in Utard. I mean Utah. She was born there, loves the desert, hates makeup and the race to "get a man," is quiet and thoughtful and funny and doesn't spend hours on her hair, and so she stuck out. I was mouthy, curvaceous (seriously, Mormon girls come in two sizes: stick thin or lumberjack), silly, boy crazy, and hated girls who's whole existence was to "get married." The locals didn't know what to do with me. A professor who was also a friend, told me he had someone for me to meet, and he'd take me to a restaurant to meet this mystery person that he knew I would "absolutely fall in love with." Chicky bow. It was Chrissy. Well, he was right.
Friday night we watched The Aristocrats together, with all of the deleted scenes from Bob Saget (He is honestly one of my most favorite stand ups. Soooooo wrong. Dana Gould is a close second.) Nothing is sacred, there are no boundaries. We can talk candidly about anything and everything. We have never argued in all the years we've known each other. We also made my husband sleep on the sofa. I forgot how fun it is to be tucked into a nice, warm bed and giggle on the pillow, struggling to stay awake and keep talking. We cried a little when I dropped her off. The kids moped all yesterday. She brings happiness and energy, and if I could murder her, grind her into a liquid and put her in a spray bottle to spritz her about the house, I wouldn't, because I think she would stain the walls. Not that murder is bad, mind you, and trust me when I say that she appreciates it wouldn't be to KILL her, but...
I just think she'd stain. Definitely clog up the sprayer nozzle.
In other news, my boy's birthday was Sunday. It was 75 degrees, blue skies, and I couldn't have asked for a more perfect day. Unless it started raining 100 dollar bills. Okay, I could have asked for a better day but I DIDN'T. So what does that say about me? I am AWESOME, that's what. Or really, really dumb. Can you ask for better days? Does that work?
If I had asked for a better day, would I have gotten it?
Yes! Man, are YOU stupid.
0(0.0%)
No, what are you, stupid?
0(0.0%)
I like mayonaise.
9(39.1%)
If I ground YOU up, I'd put you in a sprayer bottle.
7(30.4%)
Clog.
3(13.0%)
I think I need to channel this energy into a run, so Chrissy doesn't watch me from On High and point because I am LAZY. And so? I exercise. *wanders off whistling*
(The icon for this post was made by
[ETA]: I have changed my LJ name. Ahem.
- Spock is::
ditzy
Comments
And hello? Mockery and sarcasm? Staples of the British sense of humour. *g*
And how John Cleese said "fuck" at Graham Chapman's funeral, because to NOT have done so would have pissed GC off.
CHEERS!
Chrissy sounds very cool, both as a person and as "happy energy" spray. Glad you had such a good time!
Your icon makes me laugh and feel happy. Wheee!
My ears ache from the wind outside, Sue. BUT I KEPT ON! VINNIE!!! Oh, I miss our third.
Math for mocking is the best EVER. (Wal-mart? The hell?)
- Yay! how old is he now?
- Nazi!Mocking!Math!!! ::squish::
- now, die!post!die!!! only not because it's still a bit o'fun.
- I'm totally stealling a few of them icons.
::mocks you, like mad::
Math mocking!! I want a prize for that. Like... chocolate. Can I get chocolate? But not gold coins chocolate, for it is FAUX chocolate and inferior, and I mock the chocolate coins.
My boy! He is 10. 10!!! I have a double digit boy now. I feel OLD, even though I am not. I'm 16.
I heart you, mi amiga! And I'll pass on the good wishes!
I need new friends; my closest RL friend took it upon herself to go ON about how badly the Mormon missionaries she met in Korea treated Peace Corps workers, to my daughter's Mormon boyfriend whose father did his mission in Korea. In the car. At the beginning of a trip to the Seattle Art Museum.
Oh, well, could have been over the luncheon table, I suppose.
Anyway: reading certain threads in the comments that will not end reinforces my belief that, while there are no limits to human stupidity, some people dedicate their lives to the search for them.
Julia, spent too much time yesterday squirting invading squirrels with the pressure sprayer. How do you think liquid Chrissy would work for that?
Wow, to his FACE? Well, I have friends that are devout, but they can understand the absurdity of religion (aspects, at least) and can laugh at things, but... I'll assume this wasn't a similar scenario? YOW.
SNUFF FILMS. That was my first time to see that in a wank, so I feel pretty good about that.
As for Liquid Chrissy™ as a deterrant, I think no, and I'll tell you why: animals love her. The flock to her for she is the kind soul that fixes and loves every animal that comes near her, so it might actually act as a BAIT. And bring more. You should grind up my cat and spray that. But wait a bit. She's helping me with the bunny situation.
I have no words. Well, except that this isn't the first time and it won't be the last but god, seriously, I have lots of WORDS but they're likely to alienate everybody right about now :p
I like words. Words that make sense, especially. Just WOW.
in addition: you rock.
"You want to do my muuuuusical? Shrpingtime for Heetler?"
I am post modern. I'm so post modern I've actually GONE BACK IN TIME. I am currently a serf on a fiefdom. It'd be great if someone would hurry up and invent wet-naps.
We could clone Chrissy? No? Not a good idea?
The boy is ten? And just think, he'll be a teenager soon. I'll pray for you now.
MATH IS YOUR FRIEND. It keeps planes in the sky! :D We should clone her. And make her have extra arms.
And yeah, Laura is spelled: G-O-N-G. It's confusing if you aren't fluent. (And she reminds me a lot of you, which is why I like you a bunch. You gonna be on YIM later? I'll be on, in case.)
Are you sure?
Really, really sure?
Bugger.
Also, I'm Texan, so we have our own thoughts on murder. :D