First off, I would like to say that I found AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE SLASH. Ahahaha!! "Meatwad blinked as Frylock caressed him with two fries, a third became harder." TEARS. So, so wrong. Now, on with the Exploits in Bad Language Use...
- aggressive nipples Now, I think we all have known a set of nipples that just won't take "no" for an answer.
- my breast had turned into a purple canteloupe What's funny about this is that the author spent TWO PARAGRAPHS describing "her" darkening nipples. The were aggressively getting darker. RAWR.
This may be the best dialogue exhange ever:
"Are you going to rape me," she asked breathless from the kiss.
"Only if you make me force you."
Take it in. *wafts air to my face* Take it allllll in.
- Hot Piss running down your Nut Sack I like how important some words are.
- missionary stile sex which obviously is two Elders (LDS) getting in on with some pigs.
- diddle me delicately DIDDLE. The sexiest word in the human language. "Boinked me bravely." "Creamed cunningly." There should be more alliteration in fanfic, people.
- cleaning the sweat from off their brow, collectively-chaotically piled into the very small admittance room I am imagining the Flying Wandellas - glistening - and making those circus performer noises as the leap through a doorway into a small room into a large pile.
- the walls were accented -- dare I say accessorized Oh, don't be coy. You dared.
And this may be the WEIRDEST THING I have ever read, and folks, that is saying a lot. I just... Nope, nothing can touch this.
...a rather tall, well-built figure clad in bandages except for the crotch area where a large blue rectangle was growing - and growing!
"Viagra! Viagra muchachas!"
NUMBER ONE. Muchachas = FEMALES. Why they need Viagra...
NUMBER TWO. The blue triangle grew until it burst forth and rained down tiny blue triangular pills like a gumball machine. A zombie crotch gumball-meds machine in fic makes PERFECT SENSE.
DOUBLE-YOU. TEA. EFF.
All I know is it would please me greatly if EVERYONE ON MY FLIST ended all comments, posts, etc. with: "Viagra! Viagra Muchachas!!"
I am STUMPED by that one. Absolutely stumped.
Don't you need a palate cleanser after that? Sure you do. Check out all of the fantastic fics in the lynnevitational ficathon. A few that just blew me away were:
A Connor/Dawn. Yeah, you heard that right. One of the better fanfics on the net, seriously. TRUST ME.
Angel study - Gen-fic. Wonderful.
I haven't read everything yet, but these were outstanding.