Laura Stone (stoney321) wrote,
Laura Stone

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Bad!Mix (it's like badfic, but with a down beat.)

So... I love fanmixes. Maybe you've noticed? Anyway, I look for fanmixes online and come across some doozies. Lemme 'splain. For me, they're about capturing the story arc/personality of a character or show and express those things using music. I like to make them have a soundtrack feel, or maybe throw a song in there for a laugh with IRONY IMPLIED. And... I like to think I have decent musical taste. The point is, I find fanmixes where I'm left blinking over and over again at the song choices/choice of subject out there. They either show the maker has a) absolutely no musical taste or b) has absolutely no familiarity with the source material.

Long story short, I've made some faux fanmixes to illustrate this point and make you laugh. I know I'm cracking the hell up. Um... for some reason (because I'm re-reading the series and it's on my brain) they're mostly Harry Potter fanmixes. Some Jossverse and Star Wars thrown in FOR LAUGHS, Please to be Remembering that part...

"We Did It In The Magic Box" A Spike/Anya 4Eva! Fanmix

1. "My Prerogative" Bobby Brown
They say I'm crazy
I really don't care
That's my prerogative
They say I'm nasty
But I don't give a damn
Getting girls is how I live
Some messy questions
Why am I so real?
But they don't understand me
I really don't know the deal about her brother

2. "My Humps" Black Eyed Peas
What you gon' do wit all that breast?
All that breast inside that shirt?
I'ma make, make, make, make you work

3. "In Your Eyes" Peter Gabriel I totally think they did it in his Desoto
when I want to run away
I drive off in my car
but whichever way I go
I come back to the place you are

4. "Closer" NIN
I wanna feel you from the inside

5. "Lump" The Presidents of the United States of America LOL Im not sayin Spike is limp omg, he's always hard, right? LOL!
Lump was limp and lonely and needed a shove
Lump slipped on a kiss and tumbled into love
She spent her twenties between the sheets

6. "Molto allegro, Symphony 40 in B Minor" Mozart
This totally shows the heartbreak they'll have to face because of bitch Buffy and shitty Xander getting in the way of Spanya's True Love and screwing up EVERYTHING. Also, it has oboes, and oboes are kick ass. The divided violas are a symbol of people coming between them. GOD I HATE BUFFY AND XANDER!!!!114234!

"There's Not Enough Product To Express My Feelings" An Angel/His Hair Fanmix

1. "Ain't Got No" Nina Simone Angel, alone and starving, wanders the world
Aint got no father, aint got no mother
Aint got no children, aint got no
Aint got no earth, aint got no water
Aint got no ticket, aint got no token
Aint got no love

I got my hair

2. "Boys Don't Cry" The Cure Post-Mandy hair do - what was he thinking?
I try to laugh about it
Cover it all up with lies
I try and
Laugh about it
Hiding the tears in my eyes
'cause boys don't cry

3. "Hair!" The Musical Soundtrack The 80s were a tough time for our hero
Let it fly in the breeze
And get caught in the trees
Give a home to the fleas in my hair
A home for fleas

4. "Angel of Mine - Evanescence If his hair could talk, it would sing this
Drips of moonlight washing over me
Can I show you what want from me

Angel of mine, can I thank you
You have saved me time and time again

5. "I Have The Touch" Peter Gabriel So now he has the perfect gelled look, does he want people to touch it? It's so beautiful...
I tap my fingers, fold my arms, breathe in deep, cross my legs
Shrug my shoulders, stretch my back - but nothing seems
to please
I need contact

Oh man. Now I want to write a story in drabble-form about Angel trying different hairstyles. So this is basically how I avoid putting the last coat of paint on everything in my house. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

"Can I Borrow A Feeling?" A Dumbledore/Voldemort Fanmix - Their Love is So Tortured...

1. "I Will Remember You - Sarah MacLachlan - No matter how far apart they'll be, even death can't take away their memory of loving each other in the long ago
I’m so afraid to love you, but more afraid to lose
Clinging to a past that doesn’t let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light

2. "What a Feeling!" Irene Cara Their first kiss and slow dance (Yule Ball of '46 maybe?)
What a feeling.
Bein's believin'.
I can have it all, now I'm dancing for my life.
Take your passion
and make it happen.
Pictures come alive, you can dance right through your life

3. "Patches" Clarence Carter They are Yin and Yang. Each depending on each other to fulfill their destines...
He said, Patches
I'm dependin' on you, son
To pull the family through
My son, it's all left up to you

4. "Little Red Corvette" Prince For the love scene that may appear in Book 7 in flashback? ^____^
Girl, U got an ass like I never seen
And the ride...
I say the ride is so smooth
U must be a limousine

5. "Closer" NIN because I think they're both secretly Animagi (Dumbledore - Fawlkes and Voldie - A Snake) and that's how they sneak off to be together
"I wanna fuck you like an animal"

6. "All I Have To Offer You Is Me" Conway Twitty And ultimately, is love enough?
Before you take another step there's something you should know
About the years ahead and how they'll be
You'll be living in a world where roses hardly ever grow
Cause all I have to offer you is me

"An Unlikely Romance" A Crookshanks/Padfoot BDSM Fanmix

1. "Closer" NIN
I wanna fuck you like an animal

2. "Where There's A Whip There's A Way" Faster Pussycat I like to think Padfoot is the bottom, because no one does LOL
I've got you buckled to the floorboards
Got you screamin like a pooch on a leash to let you go
She grinds her leather like Liberace rhines a stone
She rides just like a pony gonna sign that filly up for the rodeo

3. "Beauty & The Beast" Celine Dion Can't you see them in Hagrid's hut with candles everywhere and a bubble bath? Feeding each other dead mice or something? (They're dipped in chocolate, of course.)
Just a little change
Small, to say the least
Both a little scared
Neither one prepared
Beauty and the beast

4. "Bow Wow Wow (The Chronic)" Snoop Doggy Dogg Because Padfoot likes it Doggy Style.
Gap teeth in ya mouth so my dick's gots to fit
With my nuts on ya tonsils
While ya onstage rappin at your wack-ass concerts
And I'ma snatch your ass from the backside

5. "Gimmie! Gimmie! Gimmie! (A Man After Midnight)" Abba A nod to all the times Crookshanks slipped out of the dorms to meet Padfoot
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!
A man after midnight
won't somebody help me
chase the shadows away

"They Said It Couldn't Last" A Professor Minerva McGonagall isn't Evil, She's In (tortured) Love With Neville Longbottom - aka McGonalbottom Love Mix

1. "You Don't Fool Me" Queen
You don't fool me, you don't have to say 'don't mind'
You don't have to teach me things I know
Sooner or later you'll be playing by her rules
Oh (fool you) oh (rule you) she'll take you (take you)
And break you (break you)

2. "Don't Stand So Close To Me" The Police You know that Sprout knows! (And wants him for herself! I bet Gillyweed is an aphrodisiac...)
Her friends are so jealous
You know how bad girls get
Sometimes it's not so easy
To be the teacher's pet

3. "Closer" NIN I bet Nevvie poo likes her to Transfigure...
"I want to fuck you like an animal"

4. "Papa Don't Preach" Madonna Papa = Dumbledore. Fraternizing with the students? I guess Snape's not the only one, LOL!!!1number!
Daddy, daddy if you could only see
Just how good he's been treating me
You'd give us your blessing right now
'Cause we are in love, we are in love, so please

5. "The Power of Orange Knickers" Tori Amos Not wearing Gryffindor colors, Nevvie? Naughty naughty!
Shame shame time to leave me now
Shame shame you've had your fun
Shame shame for letting me think that I would be the one

"A Love Less Irritating Than Sand" An Anakin Skywalker/C3P0 FanMix

1. "Rocket" Herbie Hancock
no lyrics, just the beautiful sound of machinery coming to life. And a love born...

2. "Add It Up" Violent Femmes Anankin comes back older, wiser, more in need, and finishes what he started... (and maybe adds a few features George Lucas didn't think of!)
I look at your pants and I need a kiss
why can't I get just one screw
why can't I get just one screw
believe me I know what to do
but something won't let me make love to you

(Okay, seriously. Is no one going to laugh at the subtle joke of Anakin building a machine and asking for a screw? Just me? Alrighty, then.)

3. "We've Only Just Begun" Curtis Mayfield Stupid Padme and Obi1 taking Ani away from his TRUE LOVE
Sharing horizons that are new to us
Watching the signs along the way
Talking it over just the two of us
Working together day to day

4. "Evergreen" Barbara Streisand There love will never be finished. Their love can never be denied. They're love is ETERNAL.
You and I will make each night a first
Every day a beginning
Spirits rise and their dance is unrehearsed
They warm and excite us, cause we have the brightest love

5. "Closer" NIN When Anakin comes back from killing the children of the Jedi Temple, he's out of control, filled with rage. Only one thing can save him...
I want to fuck you like an animal

6. "Master And Servant" Depeche Mode If R2D2 would would helping that dum Leia, C3P0 could go back to his Maker
It's a lot like life
And that's what's appealing
If you despise that throwaway feeling
From disposable fun
Then this is the one

There love 4evah!!!

Okay, seriously. I need to stop goofing off. And someone needs to make really bad cover art to go with each of these, because hahahahaha!
Tags: alternate things
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