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Tears of a Clown

In Sparkle-News, I made up a drinking game. Now, this is the kind of game that will get you seriously hammered, if not dead from alcohol poisoning. Smeyers: She really, really needs a Thesaurus, stat.

Every time you read the words:

  • UGH

you take a drink. Call the hospital and set up a donor liver before starting, because GOOD LORD, Perfect will raise your blood alcohol to death levels.

You'll notice that I've included the leaked book, Midnight Sun, and keep in mind it's only a handful of chapters, so the count tally for the possibly finished version will be way, WAY higher. And talk about laziness... It's Twilight, all the same dialogue, but from a different POV. And oh! I forgot all the stalker moments! i started counting every time Edward was really creepy/stalkerish (he even refers to himself as a stalker. UM, WHAT.)

Total count for the 12 chapters? 15. And that's a conservative number, because I counted all the stuff that happened IN ONE NIGHT as one. Dude, he reminds himself to buy OIL so he can make it so her bedroom window won't squeak. You know, because he doesn't want to WAKE HER UP while he's watching her. THAT IS FREAKY, SMEYERS.

Someone needs to record how many times Bella's heart stops beating/she stops breathing due to the nearness and perfectness of Edward. That's a double digit, for sure.

Okay, back to photoshopping "Jacob's" head on Professor Lupin. Hahahaha.


Feb. 7th, 2009 09:55 am (UTC)
I don't even remember where I was linked from, but I found your rundown of the LDS subtext in Twilight really interesting. I'm reading your above-linked fic at the moment, and I guess I will comment here as I don't have an IJ account.

I have to say - I know very little about Mormonism in general and their missionaries in particular, but having been raised by ultra-fundamentalist Christians, there's an awful lot that sounds very familiar. :/ And I'm loving the story - I have two chapters to go, but I need sleep so I will come back later. (I got distracted for a long time with some of the meta links... )
Feb. 7th, 2009 03:14 pm (UTC)
fundamentalists of all stripes tend to be cousins in their behaviors and strictness, right?

I'm so happy to know someone else is reading that fic, how cool! (I think anonymous comments are turned on at my IJ, so you can comment there if it's easier than hunting me back down on LJ. I'm interested in your thoughts!
Feb. 8th, 2009 01:20 pm (UTC)
that's definitely true. my dad grew up very old-fashioned conservative mennonite (both sides of my family have been amish and mennonite for generations back), and when he got older he decided THEY WEREN'T STRICT ENOUGH and he went and joined this uber-legalist back-to-puritan-basics non-denominational group. *headdesk* seriously, wtf. who does that?

I finished reading, and I will leave comments there once it all settles in my brain, but AWESOME ending. \o/


Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

Time Wot It Is

April 2017
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