Laura Stone (stoney321) wrote,
Laura Stone
stoney321

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Re: the weight debate building. (this is about eating issues, not medical conditions)

As someone who was groomed by her mother to have a specific body type, and ridiculed publicly when I didn't have that, as someone who was told by her father that it looked like I had a tire in my waist band, as someone that was an exercise bulimic in her late teens and was grey-faced and wan from being unhealthy, as someone who watched her best friend almost die from anorexia, as someone from the south on the wrong side of the grits line watched her g-grandmother kill herself with food (4'11" 436 pounds on her death bed) let me say this:

Being [eta] underweight or severely overweight combined with eating poorly and not exercising is bad for you. What a shocker, eh?

Note that I am not saying that being UNDERweight and THIN means you are healthy, because we all know that thin person that eats for crap and smokes too much, etc. *cough* Kate moss, Nicole Ritchie, Lara Flynn Boyle *cough* I'm certainly not saying that's the case, and I don't see any of my flist saying that, either. So let's not make assumptions all over the place. (As in, no one is saying people who are of a larger size are automatically unhealthy, and no one is saying that stick-thin waifs are automatically healthy.)

My goal is this: to be able to play when I want, and not have to buy a new wardrobe because of weight fluctuations. Period. I don't have a scale goal, I don't have a size goal. I've struggled with weight issues my whole life, as we all have. I just want to be healthy. To have a strong heart, to have strong lungs, legs, arms, and mind. I'm teaching my daughters that they are beautiful no matter what, and that food is not a reward, that food is not a time killer, that food is not anything but fuel, and often can taste delicious. They make healthy choices and that's all I can ask.

If I, or anyone else in your life that loves you (and you out there that know that I care about you, I DO) says that they want you to be healthy and strong, they aren't automatically saying you are fat, ugly, unattractive, unworthy, gross, etc. Honestly, I see you, not your body shape, not your foot size, any dimples on your ass, just YOU. And if I like you, I like YOU. Which means I want you to stick around for a while. And let's be honest: if you're making poor choices, you know it. You don't need anyone to tell you. I'm certainly not going to.

But I will say this: I care. I care that you might hate yourself because of a stupid scale. I care that you might be killing yourself because you use food to numb whatever it is. I care that you don't use your magnificent body that was designed to move. I care if you smoke. I care if you drink to excess. I care if you make any sort of unhealthy choices. (Wear your seat belts!) :) I CARE. I'm not judging you, I'm not thinking ugly thoughts, I just CARE.

If anyone, ANYONE needs encouragement to make healthier choices, to help you CONTINUE to make the choices you've BEEN making, to get any form of exercise you can, just say the word. I will help in any way I can because I care about you, and about you feeling your best, period. (Obviously if you have a medical condition such as hypothyroidism, etc. that screws up your body's ability to function as it should, that's a different story.) Just... don't knee-jerk to "you're judging me and hating me auuugh!" when it's not that at all. End of preaching at this end. I just can't stand to see anyone else eat themselves to death like they keep doing in my family, that's all. <3

[ETA]


I gained weight because of depression. I walked 6 miles a day, ate 1500 calories a day, and kept weight on. I GET that it's not as simple as eat less/exercise more. But - you can't honestly say out loud that eating less junk food, eating less crap and eating healthier isn't good for you.

This is NOT ABOUT A NUMBER ON A SCALE. BMI doesn't tell the whole picture. Scales don't tell the whole picture. Your VO2 tells you something about your HEALTH. Your flexibility tells you something about your HEALTH. Blood pressure, how well your body utilizes minerals and vitamins, your ability to exert yourself and not have a racing heart and the inability to breath properly.

I am not in judgment of ANYONE that feels their weight isn't what it should be. I've been too thin, I've been too heavy. All I know is this: putting good things in the right amount into your body FEELS GOOD. Using your body in a physical capacity FEELS GOOD. That's it.

Economics, genes, access to good foods all play a part, too.

The whole point is this: I care about YOU feeling good about YOU, whatever that means. I will NEVER (and have never) say that you should be such and such, or that you are doing something bad. (Unless you're smoking. Seriously. You need to stop. <-- directed at my sister) I only say this: if you WANT someone to support you in change, I'm your gal. If you want someone to continue liking you as you are, I'm your gal.

There is no judgment here, only me trying to send positive energy your way. But not in some hippie/crystal stone way. ahahaha. Ahem.
Tags: rant, to do
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