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Twerk it Tuesday

It's rained non-stop for a week now, and with all of the flash floods, etc., we've been mostly indoors, as has (evidently) every one else. Which means that the locals have some serious cabin fever happening. I'm guessing that this is the cause for some of the... snippy behavior I'm seeing everywhere. People without patience, acting testy and snotty, etc. Example: yesterday as I was driving through a parking lot, one woman decided she needed to back out without worrying about my SUV about to pulverize her Cadillac. I tapped my horn, thinking she hadn't bothered looking around before hitting reverse [after all, she probably had a muy importante bunko planning call on her cell phone, or something] and she laid on her horn, then RACED AFTER ME in the parking lot, then looped back around when I got out of my car to intimidate me. Um... This is the second time in a year this has happened. People? Don't do threatening shit. I'm clearly not a threat (hahaha, I totally am, though) but they don't know I'm not packing heat, because THIS IS TEXAS. Everyone has guns. Lol. My guns are my arms. HEEEEEE.

Anyhoodle. This morning after walking Emily to school, Miss Sally Derg and I are on our drag/run (Sally is still hating exercise) and there's a huge line of cars waiting to pull in and drop off their kids. You can see that people are getting testy in their cars. I had to stop and wait for traffic and a groovy song came on my iPod so, while Sally is sitting calmly waiting for the light to change with her tail thumping (we weren't moving, you see. Happiness for her.) I started busting a groove. I mean totally ridiculous dancing with a goofy face, because hey. It's drizzling, funky music is playing, and people are being weird because OH MY GOD I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER MINUTE IN MY CAR, RAAAAAGE and that cracks me up.

And while one of the two cars closest to me had a woman that was clearly embarrassed for me, the other lady started laughing and car dancing. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

Your mission, should you choose to accept, is to do something completely goofy and fun in the presence of someone grumpy. Randomly. Silly. Do the robot while waiting in line at the bank. Grab one leg, put the other hand behind your head, and pump that leg like you're Bobby Brown in the checkout stand at the grocers. Something. Anything. Do it! Then post this idea to YOUR journal. Get other people to do it, too. It'll be like the LJ version of a flash mob. (shout out, poshcat!)

Don't you think we should do something like this every few weeks? I love it when I catch people being silly. And clearly I don't embarrass easily. :) [and if you need help, do it around a little kid. You can excuse any silliness on just you trying to entertain a baby, right? Hee.]

HAPPY TUESDAY! [ETA] If you want, here's the song I was listening to, the very non-PC "Get Low" with Lil John [Yeah!] and the Yin Yang Twins. This song makes me laugh my butt off. "I done been to the club 'bout fifty-eleven times, can I play witcho panty line?" WOW. LOL.


( 27 comments — Leave a comment )
Sep. 15th, 2009 02:28 pm (UTC)
I'm goofy all the time so no one will tell the difference!

Seriously, though, if I try this in front of my 13 yr old he will spontaneously implode of shame. WHAT A DAMN GOOD REASON TO TRY THIS SHIT.

I loff you, woman. <3 No fer realz.
Sep. 15th, 2009 02:35 pm (UTC)
THAT IS THE BEST TIME TO DO THIS. Right when your son is coming out of the school, try to moonwalk. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Sep. 15th, 2009 02:34 pm (UTC)
The only silly thing I do is yell at SUV driving assholes on phones who cut me off when I have the walk light because they are way too important to yield to pedestrians *just back from an anger making walk with my heart beating because was almost creamed twice* It's really silly because they never, ever notice.

This post made me laugh, which is certainly calming me some. Mission accomplished!
Sep. 15th, 2009 02:37 pm (UTC)
Oh my gosh, while training for the 3-Day I had cars TAP MY LEG while I was crossing in a PROTECTED CROSSWALK because they were so busy on their phones. WOW. I think my new blood pressure control mechanism will be to tap their hood, wiggle my butt, smile, and do a dance from a show tune in front of their car, or something. Like barrel rolls from Seven Brides from Seven Brothers. And mouth at them "Stop your fucking car and pay attention, OK! L-a-h-o-m-a, Stop your caaaaaaaaaaar, NOW!"

Sep. 15th, 2009 02:54 pm (UTC)
People, please! Pedestrians! We walk among you!
Sep. 15th, 2009 02:55 pm (UTC)
What always shocks me is how little people know about RIGHT OF WAY laws. (Just look at a four-way stop for further examples on people only caring about themselves....)
Sep. 15th, 2009 02:41 pm (UTC)
Your mission, should you choose to accept, is to do something completely goofy and fun in the presence of someone grumpy

In my life, this is called being a fitness instructor

Sep. 15th, 2009 02:47 pm (UTC)

Sep. 15th, 2009 03:00 pm (UTC)
If I can get at least one laugh per class I feel like I've truly accomplished something. Making them laugh is a whole helluva lot harder than making them grunt and groan and sweat.
Sep. 15th, 2009 03:11 pm (UTC)
I've been saying that (about getting people to laugh) for YEARS. It's not easy, that's for sure.
Sep. 15th, 2009 03:20 pm (UTC)
People take themselves far too seriously all the time and especially when they're exercising. It's hardest to get people to laugh in yoga, but last night I got 2!
(Deleted comment)
Sep. 15th, 2009 03:13 pm (UTC)
!!! This was in the parking lot to Joanns (my story!) YOU WOULD THINK, huh? ZOMG, I have to get to the paper and fancy scissorsd ASAP!

I hahahahahahahahahhaha - I hope I never do, either, lol. I put a link up there to get that out of your head. Um, you might teach Jonah some new words, some you may not like. Head's up. HEE.
Sep. 15th, 2009 03:07 pm (UTC)

I already did something goofy and was told by my giggling coworkers that I'm "on" today-- and then one said I'm manic- hee!

Hey, we should talk about Mexico and see if you still can get away to spend some time with me.

Sep. 15th, 2009 03:14 pm (UTC)

Tomorrow is your birfday, YAY! We DEFINITELY need to talk about a trip, because I would love to still go with you. Call me when you're free (I'm mostly free these days, so there's not really a bad time) and let's talk shop! <3 <3 <3
Sep. 15th, 2009 03:44 pm (UTC)
just noticed your icon.

::dies laughing::
Sep. 15th, 2009 03:57 pm (UTC)
Hahahahahaha! It makes me SO HAPPY, that icon.
Sep. 15th, 2009 03:45 pm (UTC)
This kinda reminds me of that winter I spent in Philadelphia, completely freaked out about the snow and darkness, bought a purple lame raincoat (it was the 80's, shut up) and held doors for people at the train station and smiled. You should have SEEN the flinching, because clearly being polite and friendly was a precursor to assault. LIGHTEN UP PEOPLE.

Jeff and I have mornings where we primarily communicate via improvised aria. Evidently it freaks people out when we do it in public. It started as a way to keep ourselves awake and giggling on a long car trip and sorta stuck.

Sep. 15th, 2009 03:59 pm (UTC)
I've always been told that being polite up north is a sign of weakness, lol.

I kinda love that you and Jeff communicate that way. We communicate with one liners, inside jokes, and interpretive dance to the bafflement of those outside the family. That should tell you something about my family... :D
Sep. 15th, 2009 05:07 pm (UTC)
That should tell you something about my family

THAT I LOVE IT MADLY. We do this, too, including some punchlines that we don't even remember the joke for, but but still crack us up.

I wish we could have a multi-family talent night of "Show Us Your Familial Interpretive Dances."

Also shorthand. We have can have a whole conversation reduced to a few words or phrases. "Will Elwell," means, "You've asked me that question or told me that story eleventy million times and I want to keeeel you." Shuts the other person right up.

We made up a version of "I Gave My Love A Cherry" to entertain my sister's kids that goes something like this:

"I gave my love a cherry that had no stone,
I gave my love a chicken that had no bone,
I gave my love some chocolate, it was Toblerone,
I gave my love back issues of The Rolling Stone."

Once, frantic for a rhyme, I came up with "I gave my love a hammerhead shark named Big Tyrone." Yeah. I don't even know.
Sep. 15th, 2009 07:00 pm (UTC)
See, my family does stuff like this, but also with quotes from... avant-garde (crack-y crossover) fanfiction that none of us have been bothered to write because the inside jokes grew exponentially from the idea of the story.
Sep. 15th, 2009 07:03 pm (UTC)
IT IS. That or instability. I was really freaked out when I moved to the midwest, because I'd spent most of my life in New England and/or around New Yorkers, and friendliness means you're trying to get something from me.

Now that I've lived out of the northeast for the past 6-7yrs. I get to freak out out-of-towners by smiling and saying "ma'am" and "sir". WTF.
Sep. 15th, 2009 08:28 pm (UTC)
thank you, stoney, for the gift of a song. i promise to use it only in funky ways.
Sep. 15th, 2009 08:36 pm (UTC)
Go forth and rock out wisely!
Sep. 16th, 2009 05:31 pm (UTC)
as i always do, dear.

for 3 years i had to drive my kidlet the elder to the local high school to wait for her bus for the magnet school. and every day the band played. and i turned every single blessed song into 'play that funky music, white boy'. and we also played fasion police, but that's another story. hee.
Sep. 15th, 2009 10:45 pm (UTC)
You are awesome, for the car dancing alone. *busts a move*
Sep. 16th, 2009 02:34 am (UTC)
I'm just commenting to say-

Sep. 16th, 2009 11:54 am (UTC)
All y'all big tits crawl! Aww, Skeet skeet muthafuckah! Aww, skeet skeet gahd dayum!"

Or you know, bend over to the front, touch your toes, bounce that ass up and down and get loooooow.
( 27 comments — Leave a comment )


Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

Time Wot It Is

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