Can I just put this out here? I loathe "girl-geared" products. Pink tools! Yay, I couldn't even BEGIN to know how to drill a hole without my cutie patootie pink drill! It's pink because I'm a lady, and that's a lady color! Blech. I also loathe the cutification of words, too. I know some of y'all are into it, and that's fine, just know that it makes me crazy. "Prezzie." "Hubby." It's a PRESENT. And that is your HUSBAND. Oh, I'm sorry, that's your mother? Well, she looks like a man. Especially with that full beard. And penis.
I'm losing my mind today, in other words. OH MY GOD. I have rewritten this freaking prologue and Chpt. 1 so many times I just want to spit and stomp on it. BAH. If only my laptop was pink with gamboling kittens on it, it would be so much easier. Sigh. Math is hard. (MY BRAIN IS FRIED. I'm just not going to make sense to the vast majority of you, it can't be helped.)
I had the worst glass of wine on Halloween. Like, pour yourself a glass of rubbing alcohol, top it off with some formaldehyde and cherry juice. I took one sip, ACTUALLY POINTED OFF IN THE DISTANCE SO SOMEONE WOULD LOOK AWAY, and dumped my wine out on the grass, then FAKED LIKE I CHUGGED IT. That happened. In real life. My life is a living sitcom, is what I'm saying. Next up: a very special episode when my daughter gets her period! Or is that when my son brings a homeless man home on Christmas so we all can Learn Something About Compassion? If I was writing that episode, we'd kill him, roll him for whatever change he'd collected, then have a good laugh about how life can be sticky at times. Like our hands.
I got off on a tangent there. I meant to add that I've not been able to drink any wine since. And that makes me sad because I like a glass of vino with dinner. And breakfast, but it's only for the anti-oxidants.
SAVE ME. From myself, true. Nonetheless, I don't wanna look at this same document any more today, BAH.
Oh yeah! I do get to tape another audition tomorrow, and I plan on having Christopher Walken do a schpiel about how the Deer Hunter is actually "hilarious." [It's for an outdoor product store.]
I'm losing my mind today, in other words. OH MY GOD. I have rewritten this freaking prologue and Chpt. 1 so many times I just want to spit and stomp on it. BAH. If only my laptop was pink with gamboling kittens on it, it would be so much easier. Sigh. Math is hard. (MY BRAIN IS FRIED. I'm just not going to make sense to the vast majority of you, it can't be helped.)
I had the worst glass of wine on Halloween. Like, pour yourself a glass of rubbing alcohol, top it off with some formaldehyde and cherry juice. I took one sip, ACTUALLY POINTED OFF IN THE DISTANCE SO SOMEONE WOULD LOOK AWAY, and dumped my wine out on the grass, then FAKED LIKE I CHUGGED IT. That happened. In real life. My life is a living sitcom, is what I'm saying. Next up: a very special episode when my daughter gets her period! Or is that when my son brings a homeless man home on Christmas so we all can Learn Something About Compassion? If I was writing that episode, we'd kill him, roll him for whatever change he'd collected, then have a good laugh about how life can be sticky at times. Like our hands.
I got off on a tangent there. I meant to add that I've not been able to drink any wine since. And that makes me sad because I like a glass of vino with dinner. And breakfast, but it's only for the anti-oxidants.
SAVE ME. From myself, true. Nonetheless, I don't wanna look at this same document any more today, BAH.
Oh yeah! I do get to tape another audition tomorrow, and I plan on having Christopher Walken do a schpiel about how the Deer Hunter is actually "hilarious." [It's for an outdoor product store.]
- Spock is::
aggravated
'Oos dis bint, then?
stoney321- Laura Stone
- Hey, Don't Judge Me
Comments
I hated pink for most of my life, and only like it on flowers, really. And weeny baby pigs, but...baby pigs!
Math is fun when it works. I loved Algebra and Geometry in school until my brain forget everything from the first semester and made the second semester impossible. Stupid brain.
Christopher Walken roxors. I want him to be the Archangel Michael on SPN. That would be *so fucking awesome*.
*you know, cut-rate vessel like Lucifer's cut rate vessel...only it's CW, so...score.*
:)
PUKE GRREN: I'M GUNNING FOR YOU, BITCH. Lol.
*hates fun*
Totally with you on the cutification of words. I have the same reaction to that that I have to nails on a chalkboard: uncomfortable flinching.
Good luck with the writing! I'm sorry it's so frustrating right now.
Uncomfortable flinching, YES. And now, ha ha, I'm trying to imagine what comfortable flinching would be like? The limbo? :D
I need to just take a walk and move my body around, and then I won't be so AUGH-filled.
I HATE that if something is pink with marabou fluff on it, PEOPLE WILL BUY IT. I'm looking at you, CLAIRE'S STORE FOR GIRLY SHIT.
This made me laugh. It is SO Emily Howard.
"But I'm a LADY!"
May I add to this piece of offensive blasphemy that the whole pink craze makes me laugh. Look, it weeds out the people we want to avoid.
Edited at 2009-11-05 10:41 pm (UTC)
You know, you're right. And before Dennis Leary turned into a douchebag, he used to say something that I really liked: I like stupid people because it just makes me look so much smarter. Apply that here, and there you go.
Actually, big lie. I feel no pain at all.
I meant to write the other day about your back woods, gap toothed look. You could just put a fake tooth there a la Lauren Hutton. She never felt the need to get it fixed.
Eh, I might just get a flipper like those pageant babies. (haha)
The paragraph you wrote on the wine and the homeless guy - funniest thing out and it's why I stalk you - well, that and how fantastic you look in my surveilance pics. Plus I'm mentally unwell and form unhealthy attachments. Or something. HEY, an entire case of wine and beer tonight, woooooh!
In conclusion: If you're going to get your hubby a prezzie make sure it's not pink like a vagina and therefore likely to emasculate him, make sure it's white like his virile man juice. IT'S IN THE BIBLE, PEOPLE!
Oooh, 12 bottles!? MMMM. I think I'll need to open a bottle tonight, if only to loosen the knot between my shoulders. I've heard that you have to apply that particular medicine internally. Doctor's orders! (No wonder we have such shitty healthcare.)
DON'T FORGET THE FEATHERS AND RHINESTONES! I'm going to get my vagina bedazzled with rhinestones, I think. Dress it up down there a bit.
Sadly the man I'm marrying in July is thin as a rail. *sigh*
NONETHELESS. I still don't like that word.
Hubby? Blech. Pressie? Doubly so. May I be so old as to add "Preggo?" WTF. You are pregnant. Knocked up. Up the Duff. SAY IT.
As for "prezzie" and "piccie", that's British slang making its way into American speech. My UK friends have been using those words for ever, regardless of their gender.
Also, I didn't know that hubby was a cutification. :-P I don't know really what else to call my significant other. We have lived together for 6 years, not married. What do you call each other then, eh? Significant other is just to damn long a word to use. :-P And it sounds silly to.
Welcome to the insanity! *jumps off a bridge*
On another note, MTV European Music Awards were awesome last night (my time)!