And here is the full cartoon. You're welcome. That voice is another on my list of voices I can do. Yes, I'm extremely talented.
So, it turns out my in laws will be spending the holiday with us, but I sent ideas for food that she can bring so we don't have any carrot dimes (oh god, I gagged a little just thinking of them, the "recipe" is at the bottom, btw.) or sweet potato casserole made from a box (seriously?? How lazy and unimaginative can you get?) or an angel food cake enveloped in green frosting. Every gathering the woman makes those three things. Why the green frosting on the angel food cake? Why GREEN? It's inexplicable.
However! I am making things that are delicious, the Cowboys are playing (and I swear to the god of your choice, if you jackholes fall apart at the back half of the season AGAIN I may just have to support some loser team like the Eagles. Oh my god, I almost threw up in my mouth. I could never support a team from Philly, please forgive me, in the name of Tom Landry.) Attn: Roy Williams: you are this close to getting a head smack from me. If you need to put glue on your hands to hold that damn ball, do it.
I digress. Today I am: making ginger-orange rolls for breakfast tomorrow. Making homemade rolls to rise in the fridge tonight. Baking a pecan pie. Turning my chai spice cake into a bundt cake with my homemade pumpkin butter as a filling. Brining my turkey with apple, sage, peppercorns, cider and thyme. (Tomorrow it will be smoked for 8 hours over apple wood with apples, sage, and thyme in the cavity.) Oh, and I need to make sweet potato dip, since we all want mashed garlic potatoes with supper, and you need sweet potatoes for it to be an official Thanksgiving holiday (serving it with red bell pepper slices and pita chips..) I have a Pinot Noir from Sonoma to go with dinner, and a chilled bottle of Kendall Jackson for my mother in law, because she doesn't care about quality. HEY-O, bitchiness abounds. :D
I'm hoping to dive back into writing ASAP, so I may be anti-social for a bit. I'm feeling incredibly overwhelmed by all of the responsibility being thrust upon me from every corner and to insure that I don't get bitchy, I'm going to slap on some headphones, listen to Gorillaz and the Beastie Boys and some Rachmaninoff, because I like being unpredictable. Oooh, if I may geek out for a minute, I nerded out yesterday explaining to a stranger why Vladimir Horowitz is one of the greatest pianists around because the man is FASTER THAN A STEINWAY ACTION. There are maybe four people I know that give a rat's ass about that, and I love each of you with all of my heart. (I'd be MORE THAN HAPPY to explain why that is a big deal, if anyone is interested. *crickets.*)
OKAY. Diving in to my list. I'll see you on the other side. Happy abuse the Indians so they'll feed us before we rob them of their culture Day! Wait, that was too long so they shortened it to Thanksgiving. It's catchier, I'll give them that. :)
Carrot Dimes (Also called Copper Pennies.)
Get two bags of frozen carrots, cut into slices.
Put them in a ziplock bag.
Pour in one can of Campbell's tomato soup.
Add one diced red onion.
Add the cut green tops to two green onions.
Seal the bag, place on its side in the fridge.
Allow the "marinade" to soak for several hours, being sure to turn it over every few hours to make sure that delicious flavor soaks in everywhere.
Place ziplock bag in boiling water until the carrots are warmed through, dump into dish and serve.
Watch children burst into tears.
EVERY GATHERING. She makes this at EVERY GATHERING. Pass that cooking torch, woman, pass it on. My kids literally cry when they see that on the buffet table. So does their mama.