Laura Stone (stoney321) wrote,
Laura Stone
stoney321

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ATTN: FELLOW ANTI SPARKLEPIRE FEN

I blame Kassie who has shamed me for not fulfilling my duty yet. I am off to witness the trainwreck that is New Moon. I have my light up pen, my pad, and my husband (muah ah ah.) There will be bloodshed TONIGHT! Well, tomorrow, because I'm then picking up children from grandparents, etc. etc.

And in case any of you don't realize that I do not like Twilight (how would that even be possible at this point?) allow me to leave you with this Q&A that sums up my position on things perfectly. (This may be the most brilliant deflection I've ever seen.)





QUESTION:
Is there a spell to become a mermaid that actually works?
I would like to know if there is any spell available to become a mermaid, one that works. I am asking people that believe in mermaids, Don't say things like, "Mermaids don't exist," because I take it very seriously and I find it offensive. PLEASE HELP ME FIND A SPELL!
BTW, I am also a witch.

ANSWER
[Best answer, chosen by asker!!]
You enter a small pond or lake with a mask that allows you to speak similar to the ones that divers wear (Mermaids can survive in salt or fresh water.) Once submerged you begin to chant "Let my power surge and fly, flowing deep through sea and sky, take my form and let it be, free to roam the endless sea" X3. Once you have said this three times, remove your mask. once removed, deeply inhale the water. At first you will feel like you are frowning, this is to be expected. Once your lungs are full of water, they will begin to transmute into gills. Be warned, if you surface during this, the process will quickly reverse itself. Best of Luck!

I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE, THAT'S FUNNY. Unless you're a believer in transmuting into a mermaid, in which case THIS SPELL IS TOTES ACCURATE, GO TRY IT.

And my new Twilight motto:


Tags: picspam!, sparkle!, stoney doesn't suck
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