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A mini-rant, an AHHH!, and a recipe

First, because of things happening to a very good friend of mine (this has crossover with our flists, I know) who, and I'd swear this over the life of my children, is one of the most thoughtful and considerate people on LJ, I want to say this: if you ever share anything I put in a locked post with anyone outside of that locked post, you are dead to me. Now. I don't go off on people under a lock (I have, though, but it's rare) and I don't post under a lock often. When I do it's with people whom I feel safe sharing my personal thoughts. Or it's writing that I'm uncertain about. Or it's personal information about my kids, maybe pictures. NONE OF THAT IS MEANT FOR THE WORLD. I will hunt you down and shame you, should you do something like that.

But none of you would do that, right? :) And if you think it's ever okay to do so, this is where you go ahead and take me off your flist and we just call it a day, fair and square.

Having said that, I would like to direct your attention to this Murphy bed made out of a PIANO. Guys, I won't lie, this hurts me. Background info: I grew up the daughter of a piano tuner/repair man. My father is a member of a dying breed of artisans, no lie. We always had a few pianos in the house as he worked on varying stages of their rebuilding, and I spent countless hours in the summer (or after school) helping my dad rebuild the actions. (When you hit a key, a series of levers and hammers activate to hit the string. I had the glorious job of using an ancient steam iron and nasty old rag that held decades of old glue within its fibers to loosen the glue that held the felt that cushioned the hammers that sat in the butt that housed the dampers that lived in the house that Jack built.)

My sister, Dampersnspoons (hey, there's where the name is from! *g*) actually helps him tuneDO EVERYTHING ELSE with pianos as well. I'm getting off track, but I want to say yes, the idea is cool, but I think, OH, THAT GLORIOUS UPRIGHT! It could have been in my home, and the wood is so beautiful! Sigh. I realize I'm mostly alone on this one. *solo C note, drop an octave, back up and tighten* <-- for my sister.

LASTLY! Holy sheep dung, I made a "faux mashed potato" last night that I was sure no one would like, but I had to try. And guess what? It was CRAZY DELICIOUS. Also, my son didn't realize it wasn't potatoes. The secret? Actual human brains. Just kidding, it was cauliflower.

Knew it. Butter always gets ya.

Faux Mershed Purterders

1 head of cauliflower (albino broccoli), cored, and chopped up into florets. (It's gonna be pureed, so don't feel like you have to be crazy here)
1/2 C non-fat sour cream (I used greek yogurt.)
scant tsp of Kosher salt (or 3/4 tsp regular)
few grinds of black pepper
1/4 C Parmesans or Pecorno-Romano (I used the latter.)
2 TBSP butter, melted and browned if you have the patience.

Cover the cauliflower in water in a pan, cook until tender, about 7 minutes for me. Drain, put in food processor (or blender if that's what you have.) Add in the sour cream (or yogurt) salt and pepper, pulse. Add the cheese and butter and process until creamy. Mine still had a few wee chunks, but I like a little tooth to my food. And teeth in my food. Just me?

Adjust seasonings to taste, and maybe go crazy nuts with some chives or green onion or summat. This made 5 helpings. But I totally would have eaten half of this myself.

I have to go to Sam's and buy apocalypse portions of toilet paper today. Why? Because I'm an American, that's why. (Lol, I have space and a teen boy with friends that evidently eat a lot of cheese. Gross.) <-- I never said I was classy. It was SASSY. They rhyme, I get why you'd be confused.


Jan. 13th, 2011 06:35 pm (UTC)
If it's any consolation to you, that upright probably had cat pee all inside it and roach turds and water damage and was beyond repair, and probably needed new whippens and phalanges and parts that are too expensive to replace since the brand is obsolete (There were hundreds of piano makers that turned up around the turn of the century, all with specific parts that are impossible to find as they competed with the big boys and finally went bankrupt) and instead of it turning up in a dump somewhere, a lovely person decided to sleep inside it! That's kind of poetic. At least the outside is appreciated.

And I *wish* I knew how to tune pianos, but all I can do is fix everything on the inside of it and make the outside pretty and clean Steinways and scrape strings and y'know, all the laborious work that "women shouldn't do" but do. I asked dad for years to teach me how to tune and he's continually turned me down. It's a man's job, Laura! Now go get that rubber mallet and bang these key pins into the action, sand down the hammer felt, use a jigsaw to cut these phalanges, slice your fingers open as you cut leather to glue it to jacks with animal fat, fill keys with lead to weigh them, carry this 70 pound action out to the truck, and...hey, aren't you on your period?

And yeah, people who don't understand what an f-lock is and that it means "THIS IS PRIVATE 'TWEEN US GALS/GUYS" need to get the boot. Or off your filter, whichever comes first.

Jan. 13th, 2011 06:56 pm (UTC)
AHAHAHAHA, thank you for understanding my pain, and knowing how to make me not care about that piano. Okay, okay, I'm with you on the poetry of it all. BUT ONLY IF IT WAS SOAKED IN CAT PISS, BETH.

Wait... I thought you started tuning for dad, I was wrong? Color me surprised, I've been giving you more credit than you DESERVE. I wish you wouldn't lie to me, I really do.

OMG, I lol'd at the whole wommin cain't do this rant. I LOVE HIM BUT HE IS AN ASS ABOUT THINGS.

I want you to come over and make chicken verde tamales with me. SAD FACE. (I have pork tamales for you, btw.)
Jan. 13th, 2011 07:06 pm (UTC)
I think it's great that you often think I am better than I am, hahah! But nope, never tuned a piano in my life! I just do all the other stuff that's way harder and takes more training to learn how to do. Dad makes no effin' sense at all.

I would love to eat of your tamales! (And let me know what's up with the boy's b-day. We'd like to give him gifts and laughs.)
Jan. 13th, 2011 07:32 pm (UTC)
I mean, yeah, CLEARLY all of the rebuilding work is way more technical than using a friggin' oscilloscope and cranking it. (I'm making it seem easier than it is, other people reading this, my sister and dad have perfect pitch and- eh, Beth knows where I'm going with this.)

I would love for you to do so! I would also love for you to come a'rollin' with me, but I know you hate me and everything I stand for. And you may not give him laughs. You may give him introspections, please.

I'm not sure what his thoughts are on a party, but as soon as I know, I'll wait an hour, then let you know. :D
Jan. 13th, 2011 10:33 pm (UTC)
I saw this awesomely amazing documentary on piano making, where they took us step by step through it all, talking to these men and women who were, in some cases, almost the last people in the states - maybe the world - who knew how to do a particular thing to make a piano.

I want to say it was in New York, this workshop. They made *very* high-end pianos. I loved that documentary. Made me giddy and sad all together.
Jan. 13th, 2011 10:40 pm (UTC)
Someone mentioned this earlier in comments! I bet you're thinking of "Note by Note: The Making of Steinway L1037". They aren't the last people who know how to rebuild, they're just a large group of individuals working for a brand name as big as Mercedes in the piano industry. There are lots of small piano businesses that do the exact same job, every day, for multiple brands, not just Steinway. The documentary was a nice depiction of only a few things that go into rebuilding them, but enough to make people outside of the industry see how intricate they are, and also why they're so expensive!
Jan. 13th, 2011 10:47 pm (UTC)
Probably that is it, yes - the pictures at the website look familiar. They're not rebuilding, though, they're doing it from the ground up - or so it says at the site.

ANYway :) - it was awesome to watch. I wanted to rush right out and learn how to make a piano! Or a part of a piano. Any part!
Jan. 13th, 2011 10:51 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I just had my wording wrong. They are building them from scratch, but the process to build and rebuild is almost exactly the same thing, is what I was getting at. I happen to have done it myself! The people in the documentary are the only ones allowed to build a Steinway, if that makes sense? They're very select about who works for them, and they've been there for years. But I've re-built Steinways in the comfort of my father's workshop. :) It's as tedious and meticulous as any job gets, and each thing you do? YOU HAVE TO DO 88 TIMES, hahah! It's repetitive work.
Jan. 13th, 2011 10:58 pm (UTC)
Yeah, that makes sense - i'm sure that other piano makers do things ever so slightly differently and Steinway is picky about it. I'd love to sit in on a session or two of rebuilding - it would be so damn interesting.

We had a player piano, and when i was a kid, my dad redid the whole player system, using IV tubing from the hospital. (He was an anesthetist.) It was really cool to watch him/help, and we played the hell out of that piano after. Such fun!


Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

Time Wot It Is

April 2017
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