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Well THAT was entertaining. Kinda.

I had a 2hr massage today, and my normal girl wasn't available, so I got the short straw. She was illegitimately crazy. Waxed philosophic about aliens living in the center of the earth, because "something's going on down there!" She's also a dog whisperer and multiple other fun little facts.

Now, normally I'd roll with it, if only to get some new stories, right? But I really really needed a massage and she wouldn't. stop. talking. For two hours. She didn't get the "mm hmm" noncommittal responses, or when I wouldn't say anything, she'd wait a moment and then say, "Well, anyway, blah blah blah" SHE ACTUALLY SAID BLAH BLAH BLAH. Then would start a new topic. I know I should have said that I want quiet, but I'm too freaking southern and can't be rude. I KNOW IT'S NOT REALLY RUDE. But that still small voice done tole me to find a secret place in my mind and go to there.


In other news, I have today's Glee recap up, it's the Rocky Horror ep! And I hate Rocky Horror. Do you know how hard it is to not be a dick when you don't like something? I did my best, and also, there is a super fabulous cocktail based on Frank N Furter's costume with honeydew melon balls and Midori.

[ETA: It's Offical!] We'll start featuring "Top Chef: Just Desserts" starting tomorrow, premiere is tonight!

In other other news, Smidgen wants you all to know that my presence is required in her daily scritching, as she keeps walking across the keyboard. I think this post took 30 minutes to write, OKAY CAT I AM COMING GOD.


( 26 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Aug. 24th, 2011 08:45 pm (UTC)
She was about 98 pounds and 5 feet high with pure white hair, so I felt like I could take her if things got hinky. ;)

OH MY GOD!! SO...were you in Utah? (LOL)
Aug. 24th, 2011 08:43 pm (UTC)
I need this recap today like a fat kid loves cake (does that make sense?)

I guess I need it alot.

Going now....
Aug. 24th, 2011 08:46 pm (UTC)

...I'm afraid you're going to be mad at me, though, because I don't like RHPS or how creepy they made Will. I CAN'T HELP IT I HAVE TO BE HONEST! :(
Aug. 24th, 2011 08:56 pm (UTC)
So not mad at you! I generally skimmed over the fact that it was the RHPS in the show anyway...
Aug. 24th, 2011 08:59 pm (UTC)
LOL, that was smart of you. :D
Aug. 24th, 2011 09:04 pm (UTC)
See if she preforms cervical smears as well just to make things extra EXTRA uncomfortable.

I had a dream last night that I was at the carpark of the local mall, which apparently was now in Texas and I ran into you and I was awkwardly trying to explain why the hell I was there. It was weird, but not as weird as your masseuse. (Illegitimately crazy? The bastard!)
Aug. 24th, 2011 09:19 pm (UTC)
Oh, great idea! I mean, while's she's down there massaging my prostate... (I've not told her I don't have one)

I like how you're miserable and a failure in your dreams. I LIKE THAT. It makes me feel powerful.
Aug. 24th, 2011 09:24 pm (UTC)
It's funny because it was true! I was trying to explain that I wasn't actually stalking you while you were giving me weird looks and saying that you'd only just seen me, and yet here I was, back again without any notice. Maybe my subconscious thinks I spend too much time on your journal, maybe I'm feeling guilty over buying that house next to yours, I don't know.
Aug. 24th, 2011 09:26 pm (UTC)
it's probably because of that hidden camera I found in my bathroom (gross placement, I don't know why you'd want to see that) and it's giving you a sense of oogies. Or maybe that's just me.

Aug. 24th, 2011 09:35 pm (UTC)
What can I say, I like to make sure that you're eating right.

Yeah, Texas sounds great at the moment, what with the air bursting into flames because of the heat. I have to say though that when it's physically habitable I did love the place - that restaurant we went to that first day? Seared into my brain with the goodness of the food. Hmmmm, seared brain.
Aug. 24th, 2011 10:16 pm (UTC)
It's fun to walk across the street and melt the soles of your shoes, you're just not living right.

Uncle Julios - simple but outstanding. I love that place, too. So you come in two months when the temperature is moderate and we drink all the margaritas. COME ON.
Aug. 24th, 2011 11:57 pm (UTC)
Fantastic food and tasty, tasty drinks. You never did me wrong on the food front! You did me wrong by selling me off at that truck stop and not splitting the proceeds, but whatever.

Ohhh, I would love to go back. I've bought a lotto ticket so that should do the trick, right?
Aug. 24th, 2011 09:55 pm (UTC)
*shakes head* On behalf of all massage therapists everywhere, we apologize for the crazy.

However, to be fair, sticking us in a room alone with one other person for two hours and expecting us to be QUIET? All I have to say is that either I'm listening to my iPod or you're entertaining me. *G*
Aug. 24th, 2011 10:17 pm (UTC)
Ha!! Normally I have a faaaaaaabulous woman that is utter perfection, she was just booked. Boo.

I don't mind some talk, not at all. But she was like, one-upping me when I'd answer. Eh, she's just a special snowflake. ;)
Aug. 25th, 2011 04:13 am (UTC)
Completely OT...
I completely adore your icon!
Aug. 24th, 2011 11:10 pm (UTC)
You should call in to the manager and give him/her feedback. You won't be directly embarrassing the employee, and the manager will probably offer you a deal on your next.
Aug. 24th, 2011 11:44 pm (UTC)
I agree! That was a waste of a good massage.
Aug. 24th, 2011 11:44 pm (UTC)
Not a bad idea...
Aug. 25th, 2011 01:03 am (UTC)
Oh, hell no. She actually owes you money for listening to that.

It reminds me of the first dinner I had with my then-boyfriend-now-husband's-cousin, who proceeded to proclaim loudly and for most of the dinner that crop circles HAD to be made by aliens, BECAUSE THERE WAS NO OTHER POSSIBLE EXPLANATION!!!!

Aug. 25th, 2011 03:44 am (UTC)
Aug. 25th, 2011 01:38 am (UTC)
I am confused about the lack of KITTEH PICTURES in this poast.
Aug. 25th, 2011 03:44 am (UTC)
Hey Liz?

Also? LOL.
Aug. 25th, 2011 11:41 am (UTC)
Re: Hey Liz?
Aug. 25th, 2011 12:01 pm (UTC)
Re: Hey Liz?
Hahahahah, I love that .gif. Mostly how super protective the moma monkey is and how she STANDS ON THE PUNK WHAT SHOVED HER MONKEY BABY IN THEM WATERS.
Aug. 25th, 2011 05:54 am (UTC)
Speaking of people who believe in aliens, this guy came to my show on Tuesday in a fez and a bathrobe, said he was JFK's illegitimate son, bought $1000 worth of merch, and gave one of the other ushers a foot-tall statue of the Statue of Liberty, plus his phone number, email address, and website, which ended up being one for a radio station that talks about aliens. We then figured out his 12 friends with him (Oh yeah, he bought out an entire row of seats) were the radio staff, all of whom had bios up. At least one was a psychic.

It was special. OH and he came in with a box of flags, the Confederate flag prominently displayed.
Aug. 25th, 2011 11:56 am (UTC)
That is a perfect example of what makes NYC so freaking fun to be in.

But yeah - WHAT THE HELL?
( 26 comments — Leave a comment )


Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

Time Wot It Is

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