[Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend, your Percy, or your c*ck. You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can slip it in your sock.] I cannot get Monty Python out of my head this morning, so I thought I'd share the fun. Yesterday it was the Philosopher's Drinking Song.

Speaking of euphemisms, I used a few in the recap for last night's Jersey Shore. I swear, that show has become an AU of itself. I like Sammi, there is no fighting with Ron, Jenni and Sam are BFF now, and Vinny and Pauly finally go all the way and share it with the world. GOOD FOR THOSE BOYS.

And this is the last week of our writers with traveling schedules, etc., so there should be no further hiccups with the recaps not getting up within 24 hours of airtime. WHEW! I know they were all stressed about that, so I'm glad things are settling back down. Which means the following recaps await you:
American Horror Story
The Vampire Diaries
Top Chef: Just Desserts
X-Factor: The Judges HOMES

Today is a recap for THE WALKING DEADS WEBISODES. (I'll update here with the link, gimmie until 11am CST for final editing.) Then Monday morning, our newest writer will crack you up. (Her husband makes amazing special effects for horror movies, too. FUN.) If there is a show I have been looking forward to, it is The Walking Dead. LOVE IT. (The SouthLAnd in January!!)

SUNDAY ON HDJM: a zombie apocalypse survival test! Test your know how! (And can you beat my survival score? Lol.)