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PLACEHOLDER FOR BREAKING DAWN RECAP

I just got back. *inhales breath* AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! THE RECAP IS POSTED.

Um, spoilers for the one person that didn't read the stupid book,

Yep. Bit that summbitch right open. People were grossed out. I wanted to hit them, because DIDN'T YOU READ THE BOOK?! LOL.

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Comments

quietlyboloney
Nov. 26th, 2011 02:25 am (UTC)
"Her feet are going to get fat. And she is going to want all the pillows now. And she is going to cry for no reason and be really hot, no, wait, she’s really cold, and just go back to the store and get her some damn ice cream. Deal with it."

"She touches Bella, whispers “death” and goes back to scrubbing lime scale."

"Emmett turned off the Net Nanny so there are lady parts shown, and Edward is too much of a gentleman to look at that."

"starts having sex on him"

This is so glorious, I have been excited to read this. I finally saw the movie tonight. It was a fucking masterpiece.

The wedding scene was so AWKWARD. "Make contorted faces at the camera the whole time you're walking down the aisle." At least they somehow managed to make her dress look as good as possible within Smeyer's ghastly constraints.

I was disappointed that there wasn't direct teeth to uterus action, but at least we got what we did, plus a more satisfying sex scene.

All in all, it was enjoyable. And now I can read all the reviews!
stoney321
Nov. 26th, 2011 03:32 am (UTC)
Ha!!! I'm glad you got to read and laugh with me about this movie. It is seriously MSTK3 material, right???

<3
quietlyboloney
Nov. 26th, 2011 03:42 am (UTC)
I invited my friends Krissy and Joe to go with me, and it was all to make fun of it. We actually got pulled over by a cop because he kind of ran a red light, and he asked us where we were leaving from, and when we said a movie he asked which movie, and when we said Breaking Dawn he laughed and asked us if it was everything we ever wished for. We said, "And more!" and he said as he looked at my friend's license, "Poor Joe." It was GREAT. Everything was red outside after the theater though, because of red lights and it was giving me the wibblies and the fact that I'm going through my lady times is grossing me out to a disgusting degree.

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Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

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