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I miss having a fandom. :(

Which might sound strange, because I am still fannish about some shows. This post pretty much sums up how I feel about current fannish trends, aka - rolling around in spoilers and speculations and red herrings and becoming UNBELIEVABLY ANGRY about things and then spending the season bitching about how those spoilers and speculations and red herrings weren't accurate. (Oh, you don't say?)

I have not one single fannish Tumblr on my feed now. No one can be trusted (aside from my Miss Muse), I have painfully found out. I took K_B off my feed last night because someone put in their g.d. author's notes to a fic post "now that we all need a little..." blah blah - which means that they are hinting about a spoiler/speculation/red herring and now I AM INFECTED WITH IT. :(

Everyone can have the fannish experience they want. Which seems to be that they want to be angry and hate a show they continue to watch (oh my god, don't even get me started on the BZUH?-ness of that). So why can't I have the fannish experience I want? Which is to watch the show when it airs, and then talk - BEHIND A CUT - about what I liked, etc? Because people are selfish, that's why. I'm sorry if that makes you angry with me. (People who don't care about my wishes and wants make ME angry.) As flaming_muse said: spoilers should be OPT IN, not OPT OUT.

I've had four different fics on my hard drive that I've essentially deleted. I can't even consider moving forward with any of them, because my joy in the show and sharing it are pretty much gone - not to mention the whole "feeling paralyzed about writing the future with hints of what's to come having been carelessly posted."

I'm just tired of selfish behavior. It's like the majority of the people on the internet exhibit ADD behavior: complete lack of impulse control and thinking things through, or having empathy for others. /killjoy.

There are a handful of people that I enjoy in this fandom, and I'll continue to read them (and I'm talking, like six people), but man - the rest of the fandom has pretty much killed it for me. I've been in one fandom or another since I was, hmm. 11? I'm 40. I've never had such a negative experience. I say this not to be a whiner, but to stress how UNUSUAL this behavior is. This is not how fandoms typically behave, n00bs. As I tell my kids and their friends: Manners are free, so there's no excuse for you to not have any.

Not that it's a hardship to other fan-types in Glee that I'm not really wanting to play ball anymore, I'm not trying to prop myself up in importance (because let's face it - I'm not.) I'm just expressing myself in my personal fannish space.

ION, I bought my son skinny jeans and they bag on him. O_O The child eats almost $200 in groceries A WEEK. If I could bottle his metabolism...

[ETA]: Just to clear the record: I'm not trying to be all sniffy/flouncing. I'm expressing my frustration, is all. (And it should go without saying that there should be NO MENTIONS OF SPOILERS OF ANY KIND in comments here. Or speculation. Or red herrings. Or mention of Brussels sprouts. Because those are gross and make you fart.)

Comments

dovil
Aug. 17th, 2012 10:49 pm (UTC)
I saw your comment about True Blood above - didn't that get good again! Loving it! Which since I spent a couple of seasons with my D: face on (but still liked the characters enough not to quit), I'm really glad I stuck around. It's now back on the Must Watch TV list.

Spoilers suck. I was following a show for ages and a workmate, who knew I was a spoilerphobe, casually suddently mentioned that I'd enjoy the last episode because it had a twist that you could never see coming. Which meant I now knew that all the threads that were pointing certain ways were red herrings and meant that it would be the most unlikely person - and it was. I'm unleashing my pain on to you so that I might one day walk into the sun and smile again. Lovely person, but what a fuckwit.

My last fandom - had nothing to do with any communities whatsoever (aside from the occassional link to a story on the newsletter space, with plenty of warnings beforehand what the subject matter was about) and ruthlessly cut people out left, right and centre until I got the fannish experience that I wanted. I even told a couple of people to unfriend me because they were apparently very upset with what I was writing but weren't prepared not to read it (not that you can avoid that when it's in a shared community space, but that was the point, it was my own personal journal).

People want their own individual expectations to be satisfied by the fanish hivemind, but unfortunately that's never going to happen because people's individual expectations of what life should be like isn't satisfied by the behaviour of others, so why should online be any different. What I'm saying is that people are jerks and we should hate everyone and twitch our front window curtains aside and scowl at the neighbours kids and write angry letters to the council.

I'm going to live in a cave. Rocks will be my friends.

I am sorry that fandom is being a dick. Have you thought about drinking heavily? I find that helps most things. Except my chronic alcoholism, but I have meth for that.
stoney321
Aug. 18th, 2012 01:38 am (UTC)
I would like you to know that I've begun therapy: drinking heavily to counter the affects of a fandom gone wrong and it's helping

I'll need to apply 750L of vodka to make sure, though. Thanks, Doctor D!

(And of course - I agree with everything you've said. I remember how unhappy you got in your fandom. :( Stupid spoilers...)
dovil
Aug. 18th, 2012 01:58 am (UTC)
Hmmmmm, vodka. I mean, hmmmm, prescribed medication. Actually either of those could work.

Hey, I also got a 15k mini-thesis and a degree out of my last fandom so sometimes taking things too seriously can pan out, lol!

If you cut communities out you can cut the stupid, but that also means that you cut out some of the experience of belonging, so I just say cut other people instead (why cut yourself, it's just horrific scaring that could be on someone else).

I think the key to fandoms is riding the high while it's there and then bailing out before the crash and the hangover hits. Blah though that it's going through a crappy phase, maybe it'll get better though rather than it being on the decline. Or maybe you need to get involved in Golden Girls fanfic; for the more mature fanficer.
stoney321
Aug. 18th, 2012 02:13 am (UTC)
HAHAHA, awesome on the mini-thesis!

I plan on just cutting anything living within arm's reach. I bought a dozen box-butters tonight so I can finally have the experience I've always wanted. (And I guess I should be in Dexter fandom?)

LOL at Golden Girls. "Picture it! Sicily: 1922!" Oh, Sophia. Thank you for being a friend.
dovil
Aug. 19th, 2012 09:09 pm (UTC)
You need a saying: 'Fandom is My Drug and Douchebags Are Cutting My Crack With Their Crap'. That's a TERRIBLE saying. Never use it.

People are the best things about fandoms, but also the worst. What I'm saying is that there need to be death squads and cullings - their saying can be 'Keeping Our Happy Place Happy!'. That's a perfect saying. The death squads should totally use that.

Tags

Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

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