?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T DIE FROM PORKING A WASP'S NEST. 140+ stings, 54 of them on his wang.

WARNING ABOUT THAT LINK: a man grabs a handful of wasps before the story starts and I am covered in hives just from that.

YOU KNOW, THAT IS ENOUGH, PEOPLE. That is just freaking enough. Honestly? I think there needs to be MORE OF THIS HAPPENING to thin the herd. This is mother nature's way of culling the flock, this I believe.

Hey, guys! I thought I had a rough morning, and now I'm too shocked and baffled to remember what the hell even caused my frustration. Sounds like I need to eat a plate of French fries and have some cheesecake because LIFE IS SHORT. Especially when you poke your hose where it doesn't belong.

Fun fact: I am DEATHLY allergic to wasps. I'm very allergic to bees, but wasps can kill me. I almost died when I was a kid when four yellow jackets stung my shoulder and I went into cardiac arrest and my throat closed up. I AM A LITTLE STRESSED ABOUT THIS STORY. And also I am laughing, because that man clearly needed to die.
Poll #1913609 Quick Looksee Into Who Would Be Interested

If Laura was to have a weekly/bi-weekly online chat where she answered gardening questions, I would

be interested in participating, either by watching or sending in a question.
46(83.6%)
not interested because I don't garden, am not into that topic, or other reason.
9(16.4%)

When in need:

French fries! (Mm, salty goodness.)
41(29.3%)
Chocolate! (Mm, repair Dementor damage.)
53(37.9%)
Green peas! (Mm, I'm a weirdo.)
8(5.7%)
Booze! (Mm, smells of Mother...)
35(25.0%)
Glue sticks! (I'm Ralphie Wiggums.)
3(2.1%)

Comments

soundingsea
May. 15th, 2013 01:36 am (UTC)
I am averting my eyes from even your description of the story, because OMG WASPS SHUDDER.

Stoney, I want so much to plant my tomatoes! But there is all this stuff about ~~soil temperature~~ and I'm wondering if I just take my probe thermometer to the garden!?
stoney321
May. 15th, 2013 01:48 am (UTC)
ARGH, tomatoes are tough. You need the soil to be about 70 degrees. to really get them to thrive. (You can actually kill the roots if you plant it when it's still cold. But that's when the ground is close to 50.)

Are daffodils done in your area? Is it solidly above 50F at night? You're probably okay, then. TRICK: your tomato plants need to be stripped of the lower leaves and planted all the way down to the NEXT set of leaves like THIS. You'll have a stronger root system, ergo, stronger plants. :D

If you really want to jump start, plant them near cement - the sidewalk, street, a retaining wall. You'll get all of that reflective heat warming up the soil.

(And I have been horrible about replying to old posts, so I wanted to thank you for your links to help my blog. THANK YOU!)
soundingsea
May. 15th, 2013 02:22 am (UTC)
I... do not think I could pick a daffodil out of a lineup without using google image search to cheat. :) But it looks like this week we'll finally be above 50F at night! I just get confused about soil temperature vs air temperature. The googles are full of contradictions.

I knew about the leaf-stripping, but that picture is the first indication I've seen that says to put the root-ball side-ways. Interesting.

Our plot's in the middle of the community garden, so there is nothing nearby. (Bonus, at least, being the full sun all day.)

Oh, awesome - did one of those tips end up leading you to something that worked?
stoney321
May. 15th, 2013 02:41 am (UTC)
skip the daffodils. Watch the local temps. The longer you can hold out, the better off you'll be. The closer to 70 your lows are, the better your tomatoes will do, promise. Soil vs. air: air is WAY WARMER FASTER than soil temp. The ground takes a long time to warm up, that's basically all you need to know.

That picture is one of the only ones I've ever seen that actually shows the best way to plant. You end up with twice the roots that way. More roots, healthier plant, more tomatoes. :)

THEY DID, THANK YOU!
soundingsea
May. 15th, 2013 03:11 am (UTC)
I will try to be patient! *chews on fingernails* And when the time comes, I'll definitely go for twice the roots.

Glad that stuff worked. Hey, look at that; the stuff I do for a living is semi-useful; who knew. ;)

Tags

Are You Actually

Reading this? I'm just curious. Because that's really detail-oriented of you. Feel free to stop reading. But you can see that there's more here, so are you going to keep reading? Really? That's pretty dedicated. I'm impressed. No, really. I'm not being sarcastic, why do you get like that? See, this is the problem I have with your mother - yes. YES. I'm going there. It's time we put all of our cards on the table.

I love you, why are you doing this? After all we've been through? You don't have to be like this. You know, still reading. You could be baking a pie. And then sharing it with me.

Time Wot It Is

April 2017
S M T W T F S
      1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30      
Powered by LiveJournal.com