Laura Stone (stoney321) wrote,
Laura Stone
stoney321

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Extra spoons?

I'm all out. (If you get that reference, you're old. Hey, I am, too.)

I decided that I deserve nice things recently and planned a birthday party for myself. (I typically don't do anything for my birthday because my daughter's b-day is the day before mine. She should have the attention. Plus, that's a lot of cake.) So I'm throwing one for myself a week early and have some of my dearest friends coming to help me float in the pool, eat delicious food, drink delicious wine, and talk fandom/random all weekend. (I'm kicking the family out to go camping or whatever.)

In preparation, I've spent the past week scrubbing the house from stem to stern, not to mention getting my butt out in the garden to finish some huge projects that are taking me forever to get done.

Well...the garden isn't going to be done. It's 100F (40C) all week, was close to that last week, and I give up. I was sweating so hard the other day that my kids thought I poured water all over myself. GROSS. The kids decided to tear the wallpaper off their bathroom, so I spent all yesterday finishing stripping that off with them, then prepping the plaster and painting it. (Which meant taking the toilet out, faucets, etc.) HEY, DIDN'T PLAN ON THAT TASK. But it's done? And will look nice for my guests? Gah.

It's hard for me to not have everything looking perfect. I was raised to be perfect. Not strive for perfection, but to BE perfect. Vacuum tracks in the carpet, everything spic-and-span, I'm a Master Gardener, so it better LOOK like I am and...I have kids. It ain't spic-and-span. (And these are my dear friends, they won't judge, I know that intellectually, but my mother's voice still creeps in and it's hard.)

Example: my son was talking to me last week while I was styling my hair in the bathroom, and he pulled the towel bar right out of the wall because he was leaning on it. So I had to patch those holes this weekend. Will those patches get repainted in time? ...probably not. And I am having to tell myself it's going to be okay.

I JUST FIGURED OUT THE SOLUTION: get everyone too drunk to look too closely! Okay, this can work. Ha. *blows bangs out of face*
Tags: navel gazing, waaaah
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