I HAVE to get this stupid job done today. I am HATING my editorial job for the Master Gardener's magazine. The actual work is fine. Not much there for me other than approval of content, and I have EAGLE EYE proofers. But. I have all these uppity women with waaaay too much time on their hands who send me hate mail for not spotlighting their Iris Society plant sale. Or that a certain member who got a fucking plaque for always showing up at the Rose Society Fundraisers didn't get a friggin' cover story. I am not making this up. o_O
No, I just featured a local school for autistic and handicapped kids (of which my youngest sister is one)where the MGs built an acre of greenhouses, taught the kids how to garden, grow the school's FOOD, have a yearly plant sale and donate all the money to the school... Huh.
Or two months ago where the cover story was about the Little Hands on the Farm, where we take kids from inner city school and they get a day at the Fair to learn that milk comes from cows (I swear, some kids do not know this.) That bread comes from GRAIN, on and on, and then they learn how to grow things them selves.
Or February's issue where I highlighted a program at Juvie Hall where we teach these kids that they CAN do something (they are SO ANGRY when they go in) and they learn patience, peace, and satisfaction from DOING SOMETHING positive by growing something. You'd be amazed at the satisfaction you can have at putting a seed in some dirt, then 60 days later harvesting your own tomatoes. Or a peach. Or learning how to cook with food you grew. Or making a boquet from your own garden and taking it to a nursing home. Most of the kids (80%) in our program DON'T GO BACK. Tell me something else with that kind of stat.
And silly me. I thought that was more important than Bunny Thompson being named "fundraiser extrodinaire" or Kitty Hathaway being the "belle of the Iris Ball." Fucking society women. Most of the MGs are like me - get their hands dirty, like giving back to the community. It's the noisy biddies with nothing but their showdogs and "social clubs" to occupy their time that are DRIVING. ME. CRAZY.
Deadline in five hours. Vericonca Mars finale tonight. There may beseveral bottle of wine involved with the watching. Oh: does ANYONE have a copy of The Go-Gos "Turn in to You" on mp3 that can yousendit to me? It's for a super seekrit project. 10Q if so!! Or Julie Brown's "The Homecoming Queen's Got a Gun?"
No, I just featured a local school for autistic and handicapped kids (of which my youngest sister is one)where the MGs built an acre of greenhouses, taught the kids how to garden, grow the school's FOOD, have a yearly plant sale and donate all the money to the school... Huh.
Or two months ago where the cover story was about the Little Hands on the Farm, where we take kids from inner city school and they get a day at the Fair to learn that milk comes from cows (I swear, some kids do not know this.) That bread comes from GRAIN, on and on, and then they learn how to grow things them selves.
Or February's issue where I highlighted a program at Juvie Hall where we teach these kids that they CAN do something (they are SO ANGRY when they go in) and they learn patience, peace, and satisfaction from DOING SOMETHING positive by growing something. You'd be amazed at the satisfaction you can have at putting a seed in some dirt, then 60 days later harvesting your own tomatoes. Or a peach. Or learning how to cook with food you grew. Or making a boquet from your own garden and taking it to a nursing home. Most of the kids (80%) in our program DON'T GO BACK. Tell me something else with that kind of stat.
And silly me. I thought that was more important than Bunny Thompson being named "fundraiser extrodinaire" or Kitty Hathaway being the "belle of the Iris Ball." Fucking society women. Most of the MGs are like me - get their hands dirty, like giving back to the community. It's the noisy biddies with nothing but their showdogs and "social clubs" to occupy their time that are DRIVING. ME. CRAZY.
Deadline in five hours. Vericonca Mars finale tonight. There may be
- Spock is::
aggravated - Current Music:Kill Bill soundtrack - in my MIND
'Oos dis bint, then?
stoney321- Laura Stone
- Hey, Don't Judge Me
Comments
An old biddy got it bad, cuz I'm down!
I've got to make sure I have all of my articles, cut out what can't fit, brave the storm of the bitches who hate my decision as Editor (um, none of them stepped up to the task when I smiled sweetly and offered them my job, when they so CLEARLY could do it better), I'm going to go for a walk to knock out some AGRESSION, spread fertilizer on my beds (shit mood - spread shit) and I bought Diet Sprite in cans yesterday in anticipation. WHEE!
The Big Guys of the rose world are all dirty fingernails sorts, it's the Exhibitionists who have zero sense of proportion.
I suspect Orchid Society people are not of this world.
Julia, Native Plant Society people are cool but they do tend to be crunchy types
What is up with the Iris Society!! It's the same EVERYWHERE. They're frigging irises. I MOW mine, come June. Sheesh. once Miss Emily is in Kindergarten, I plan on becoming a Master Naturalist as well, as they are definitely "my people."
Stoney, the crunchier, the more I can deal.
Yes, I'm quoting Hagrid. Shaddup. It's true!
Will you squee with me in July when the book is out? I will be boinging, to be sure.
::goes cross-eyed with the effort::
Bah. I just hate snippiness. Unless it's coming from ME. :-D
YAY VM is right! I've been re-watching the series on my computer, I love it so much. SKVEE!
Darlin', you da best. Always fun and funny and I love hearing the (not so) sordid details of your life. Sorry I haven't been as commenty lately, but I am here. I will come out of lurk mode now. ;)
I can't fully believe that there are people in the world like the people in Texas. Your Master Gardener crazies are a good example.
What is a Master Gardener? Did you have to take a course, or get a tattoo or anything?
If you read the thread started by Julia_here up above (she lives close to you) you'll see that those who "specialize" in one thing, be it a plant, an animal, whatever, tend to be loopy. My god, have you seen the CAT SHOWS? Huh??
MGs take a year long course, give 100 hours in volunteer time at the COunty Extension Agency answering phones from citizens regarding plants, turf, trees, disease, vegetables, insects and providing free help. We go to schools and educate kids on conservation, responsibility to the environment, give lectures around the city on those same topics... And you have to renew your edcation and Volunteer hours every year to maintain your "title." It's a lot of work and I love it. Most of the MGs are like me. There are just some women who are old, lonely, and have waaaay too much money and time on their hands and get pissy.
*sics spike on them for you*
How you doin'?
(And the new roomie/dog? Fine? Looking at the calendar a lot?)
I just let them know that my position will be open next year, and I went ahead and signed them up for first consideration.
Haven't heard from them since. :-D
and fuck Kitty, Bunny and Muffin.
Rock on, Miss Stoney. Tis your destiny.
Dude, today my life will go back to normal (um, have you called me lately? I think you have.... I haven't been on the phone since the wedding bru-haha began, and then my editing deadline loomed. Meep!)
Now why on earth would you want those songs?
Now, I'm one of those weirdoes that talk about plants using their Latin names, but only to clarify specifics with my friends. If I'm talking to a regular ol' person, common name like stinkweed, or them purple pansies will suffice.
Some people just need to bitch, I've decided.
I'd suggest hitting Bunny and Kitty with a rolled up newspaper like they was a yappy little dog and saying "No! No bark!".
Hitting... haven't tried that one.
I can't wait to see pics! Take a pic after you get it planted and watered in (deeply!) and then again next year at this time. You'll be BLOWN AWAY by how quickly they grow. I NEVER buy big plants, always seedlings, seed, or small 4 inch pots because I know that I can wait one year for bigness and save 65% of the cost.
PICS!!!
"as he empties himself in his lover’s bowel." I thought you'd like it.
I printed out Connie and I read it all last night. I'm computerless at home for now. It was heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelarious!!!! I loved it. It's destined to be a classic. I predict one day it will be on Broadway, regarded as well as Spamalot. Of course it will;)
what's your email addy? I have a question to ask you.
*smooches you all up and down*
morrisona [at] sbcglobal [dot] net