Laura Stone (stoney321) wrote,
Laura Stone

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More Fic! Wanna Laugh? SUUUUURE You Do!

Okay, I'm leaving for NYC for the weekend (I'll be back Sunday) so I wanted to post something FUNNY and LIGHT since my last two posts were grumpy. Must. Leave. On a Good. Note.

So here's part two of "The Tale of Moon Hair and Beaver" which is (oh my god, stick with me on this one, folks) a Spander AU offshoot from the Buffy/Spike/Angel AU Native American Indian fic. Shhh. Trust Mama.

The Tale of Moon Hair and Beaver, Part Two

Continued from Here


He Who Re-Builds Things That Are Broken Over and Over Again, now known as Beaver, pushed away from Moon Hair. Moon Hair backed away, confused as if he drank too much of the Corn Drink from the Hunt Night Pow Wow. Moon Hair adjusted his loin cloth. It seemed it was not time to shoot his Arrow just yet.

"Beaver - why do you pull away? My people's Chief Warrior says that what two Warriors do at night on a long hunt, when no other braves are around, is for those two Warriors alone."

"Chief Warrior, huh? Yeah, I just bet he told you that. Listen. This is wrong. Isn't it? I mean, your people are hunters - killers. My people? Not so much. More: bore you to death kind of people."

Moon Hair stood tall. For him. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked at the boy. "You have only pulled your Arrow. You have not felt your Arrow pierce the hide of that which you hunt. This is true, yes?"

"And by Arrow you mean... Oh! Oh. What? Huh. No way, man. I've plunged my Arrow in so many different animals, it's not even funny. Rabbit, Elk, Deer, Skunk... Okay. Forget that last one I said. Can you just let me brainstorm for a second and come up with something more... macho? Oh! Wait! The mighty Puma. I've plunged my Arrow in that pussy."

"Your words are strange, and you hide behind them. You offered to lay down on the skins with me. We will do so. We will do it now." Moon Hair pushed the boy backwards towards the skins.

Beaver laid down, hands trembling, and looked up at the silvery-haired brave standing over him. "M-mommy?"

Moon Hair stopped unlacing his long deerskin moccassins. "You wish to suckle at me? Like a Squaw?"

"What I wish for now is to hide far, far away from here."

Moon Hair held the leather thong that kept his loincloth on and looked upon the boy. "Tonight you will learn what it is to be that which is hunted."

"Moon Hair. Tonight it is YOU that will learn."

Moon Hair and Beaver turned to see Stone Head standing over them, tommahawk in hand. Stone Head was in his Chief Warrior headdress adorned with Eagle feathers. He wore his chest plate of bones that he had taken from the Elk. And his loincloth appearerd to have a totem hidden away.

"Moon Hair. Always you lose yourself with words. We should name you Magpie. You were not speaking well to the boy. I would say you were being a little hard on the Beaver."

"Stone Head! Why do you come after sending me away? Did you... Does the village need my skill with the arrow and spear?"

"The village? Oh, yes. Yes, the village missed your mighty Arrow."

"I'm just going to sit here for the rest of the night, aren't I?" asked Beaver.

Moon Hair spoke to Stone Head, "Chief. Did you know that the People of the Clacking and Fighting -"

Beaver interrupted, "Actually, it's 'People of the Clacking, Fighting Tribe,' no 'and.' I'll shut up now."

"His people - they believe that it is wise for two warriors to lay on skins together for warmth. Their people do not question when two braves wish to lay together. Chief Stone Head - do they not sound like reasonable men?"

Stone Head looked at the boy. He put his tommahawk back in its' holster and absentmindedly began to tug on the laces on the sides of his loincloth. "Beaver. Tell me: where do your people live?"

"Oh, on the far side of the River of Many Forks, and in the direction of where the sun rises. We call that 'East.' "

"You live in a land called East?"

"Uh.... No. Where the sun rises? We call that E- Nevermind. I'm from the land called Cannuck."

"They sound like a wise people. You will show me what your braves do when they seek one another for warmth. And when you are done showing me, you will show Moon Hair."

Moon Hair turned to Beaver. He felt his Arrow rise with the thrill of the hunt.

Stone Head spoke again. "And when you have taught us the ways of your people, I will show you the Dawn Key punch."

Beaver had been holding a stick in his hand. At the comment from the large and looming Chief Warrior Stone Head, he jumped slightly, and snapped the stick in two.


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